Memories of Mac
EULOGY TO OUR BRAVE LITTLE ANGEL BOY Everyone has his personal hero, someone that he admires, someone who performs a courageous act and saves a life, someone who discovers a new truth or way of seeing or whose actions echo loudly in the world, someone whose name is grabbing headlines of world's newspapers.
My personal hero though is not a human being, my hero is just an innocent doggie, my silent hero are you, little Mac, whose tragic story was never meant to hit the headlines but rather go into oblivion. A most horrific crime had occured, but they both thought that as you were just a dog nobody would pay any attention to your death.
This is a true story of our angel golden boy who had never done anything wrong, whose only wish was to please his owners, who only wanted to be loved and taken care for, who only hoped to live his doggie dreams. It is the story of one of the most loving God's creatures who no matter how hard we try always give us back more.
This story is also about cruelty, betrayal, unspeakable suffering, indescribable torture and most agonising dying. It is a story of pure Evil, a story of a heartless man who came on this earth to bring nothing but destruction, the man who is a complete disgrace to a human race, a cowardly sub-human whose hands were obviously trained to kill those who can not defend themselves. It is the story of probably the most barbaric, brutal, sadistic and savage example of animal cruelty in the UK in the last decades.
The Welfare Officer who exhumed Mac's broken body was shocked by the extent of injuries visible on the dogs remains, a post mortem revealed these to be the tip of an iceberg of wanton brutality.
And at the same time this story is also about countless innocent, faceless, voiceless victims all over this cruel world. Mac's name is so a metaphor for all nameless animals who are daily brutally beaten, abandoned, abused, burned, shot, butchered, rapped, tested, exploited, tortured and slaughtered both in industry and our personal lives, for those who suffer tremendously and who are silently waiting for us to finally do something to ease their pain.
My little Mac, you too would have stayed buried in that garden, anonymous and completely forgotten unless at least one decent person of higher moral and ethics broke the silence and made one of the involved contact the police and in that way your brutal case became public. Still for some of us there are too many ambiguous facts and misleading details and as you being not here anymore I somehow feel you want me to speak out in your name. You may have been here only for a short while, still you left such a powerful legacy, the legacy that should never be forgotten by any of us. In your short life you never knew what love was, now you are loved by so many. As long as I am here your memory will never fade, it will remain and it will grow. It is the legacy you left to me and to each of those who really care.
Dearest Mac, you are probably the only one who knows how hard it was for me to go once again through all those heart wrenching articles and personal mails from my British and Irish friends. For animal lovers the issues about animal abuse is never pleasant thing to deal with, we are usally too sensitive and generally avoid hearing striking details of any suffering. The truth is too painful, yes. But someone had to do it if we don't want your excruciating pain and cruel dying had been in vain. You little doggie had no choice, nobody asked you if you were willing to go through that horrific torture, nobody questioned your readiness to die, nobody stopped the sick minded monster. You couldn't cry for help as you had no voice, so you just hung all alone from that rafter praying for mercy and a quick end. So I felt I would be the one to tell what was going on those two days in October, because I always believed in our proverb: to say nothing, to do nothing, stops nothing.
Sadly your tragic story received more attention than you had ever experienced in your short life. Your case is now known all over the world. I will never know what made that man so malicious, his injuries to you were not born out of hostile impulse only but out of deep seated meanness, from an inner need to satiate his satanic desires. I will never know what made him do it and I will never forgive.
25th -- 26th October, two years ago
It all started because of money, the money that wasn't even spent on your needs. I am trying not to imagine your utter horror when you heard their raising voices so familar to you and your canine instinct warned you he would be after you again. Because you knew what was coming, as it had happened before, not once but many times. You ran behind the house, you tried so desperately to squeeze into a corner behind the wall, hoping to make yourself invisible. With the signs of never ending hardship still imprinted all over your aching body you knew you had no chance, you knew he was so much bigger and stronger. You looked around for somebody to help you, but nobody would, sweetie, you were all by yourself again. You watched him coming closer, the look in his cold eyes made your small heart beat faster and faster, your body shrink with fear.
He reached for the garden hose, filled it with water, he called for her and told her to watch how you were going to drown. He sprayed the powerful water in your face, you started to cough and choke, your eyes pleaded for mercy and you already hoped God must have heard your silent prayers as he suddenly stopped. How could have you known that his malicious mind was already planning another way of torture, this time to break your body and spirit forever.
He picked you up and took you into that garage. He tied you by your choker chain from the rafters and left. You were hanging there, in that dark garage, all alone and scared, your paws barely scratching the floor, your mouth agaped struggling for breath, your innocent eyes moisted with hidden tears. Still with your brave heart you hoped that she would come to untie you, you longed so much to see the door open, hoping she would save you, but your hopes were in vain. All you heard was his heavy footsteps and there he was again. You couldn't move, your body being tied to that rafter, your lungs fighting for breath. This time he put on his heavy steel toe capped boots, and while you were still hanging he started to kick you again and again. You felt your ribs breaking, you whined and wept, but he wouldn't stop, would he my angel, the coward was enjoying too much with inflicting such indescribable pain to your tired, defenceless little body.
Finally he left you half-conscious, still your excellent canine hearing told you that he drove away and filled you with another hope that it was finally over, you longed she would come now and take you somewhere safe, somewhere he wouldn't find you, maybe even to someone who would heal your body and take care of your many bruises and broken ribs.
And she came, didn't she, Mac. She, who you believed would be your saviour, opened the door. You were so happy to see her and when she untied you, you gathered the last strength left in your exhausted body and to let her know how much you appreciated her coming you even wagged your tail and licked her hands.
She patted your head but wouldn't take you anywhere safe but straight back to the kennel. She ignored your silent plea. She pretended not to see your many bruises, the blood still running from your mouth, your legs barely walking. She had a chance, dear Lord offered her a choice but she rejected his offer, thinking only of her own safety. It would take just a short call and you would have been safe, why she didn't grab the chance she had I will never understand. But then you already knew there was little hope you would make it this time.
You were back in the kennel again, all alone, still in paralysing shock, your body beaten, your heart racing and your breath short, your eyes fighting with tears and your innocent soul filled with such deep sorrow, still wondering what you had done this time to make him so angry, but there was no answer. Because you didn't do anything, my angel boy, you were just a sacrifice lambie of the most malicious mind I have ever heard of. And you knew all the time he would be back soon, too soon.
Words do really come short when describing what you went through in those long fifty hours, my little Mac. Each time I imagine what you were going through I break down. The psychopat came back, took you out of the kennel and tied you to the roof again, all the time kicking you, hitting you with a boulder, with his satanic mind he laughed and mock you. He didn't want to destroy only your body he also wanted to break your spirit, but here he failed, Mac. You fought back with your inborn canine dignity. Your body was covered with bruises, your back swollen, the blood already flooding your lungs and brains, your eyes blinded, still you were hanging there proudly, watching him and waiting for the last blow.
And finally after countless hours of inexplicable torture you saw angels slowly descending towards you in that amazing glow of the Moon, bringing from above echoes of divine mercy and love for you, my baby. And when the final blow did come you didn't feel pain anymore. You just closed your eyes and left angels lift your broken body, softly and with so much tenderness, carrying you to another world, free of pain and human evil mind.
And all that time God was watching and watching, his eyes sad seeing another human betrayal over one of his beloved creatures. Angels took you right to Him and put you in His lap. He opened his arms and smiled, saying: Come to me, little Mac, you are home now.
My sweet Mac, I told you so many times how deeply sorry I am for what happened to you. I still cry whenever I look at your photo, your sad, soulful eyes are breaking my heart over and over again. If I could perform a miracle I would bring you back to this world, I would embrace you with healing powers to make you healthy and strong again. In most mysterious way God decided you became part of my life and I hope you feel I accepted you with such a warm embrace and so much love. I know you are happy where you are now, you are surrounded by light so very different from this earthly place, you have finally found so much love and compassion, true love that makes no demands, imposes no conditions, sets no restrictions. And what is most important, you are not an anonymous victim anymore.
If my life went on the same without the spiritual presence of you Mac, who have died as a martyr, I could only conclude that the life I celebrate here on your memorial site made no contribution, filled no space, meant nothing. The fact that you did leave behind a place that cannot be filled by anyone is my highest tribute to you, Mac. Life can be the same after a trinket has been lost, but never after the loss of such a treasured and brave doggie.
Cruelty to animals has cursed the human race for countless ages. We are supposed to live in a civilised society, where violence should be the law of primitive nature. Each of us on this site has a special bond with our pets, for us they are more than just a pet, we view them as family members. When we lose them a part of us die. But there are so many others in the so-called outside world who play their sadistic crafts of animal abuse, animals exploitation, subjugation and murder, animals who never felt human love, animals nobody mourns when they die. And there are also others who seem to be oblivious to the tremendous cost to our innocent victims and at the same time to our own souls. Let's not forget that it is never wrong to do the right thing. And fighting for voiceless animal rights is the righteous thing of all.
When we let people harm the animals, we are also hurting ourselves, we show disrespect for what God created for us. We all long for the time when all animals get the rights they deserve but to achieve that we must do something. It's not just you and me; it's all people who really care. We must do it now, because if not now, then when? Each of us can do something; if we join our hands we can do everything.
The fight for Mac and all Macs of this world is not over yet. The very special young man from his country still needs our signatures. His goal is to achieve stricter animal laws and stricter sentences for all abusers. I know our Mac is his inspiration and Mac knows that without him his murderer wouldn't be in jail now. Bless you Aaron, and bless all those who have helped me with my own fight for little Mac's justice. I wouldn't have done it without invaluable help of Pressy's GP, Irene, Zara and my dear friend Shari, who encouraged me when I got too desperate. Shari once wrote to Mac's guest book that maybe angels will send Mac back to the Earth to see there are so many of us now who love him. In a way she predicted what really happened. My new dog is the very picture of our angel boy. He's a a rescue, a white golden and his name is Mac.
My special thanks goes to Ginny, due to her and this wonderful site Mac is happy now because he finally feels so much love. And to all people who spread the word about his petition site or added the link to it on their babys pages.
But my deepest heartfelt thank you goes to my beloved dog Puck. His love and the bond we still share is the greatest motivation that keeps me going in the right direction. He is and remains my biggest inspiration.
My little angel boy, you are in heaven now, cradled in God's arms covered with his love and with the love of all our babies who keep you company while waiting for us. Rest in peace my stoic, brave, little hero. I am leaving you with one of your beautiful country many blessings. May angels sing it to you softly on this sad marker.
May the Light of the Lord shine from your eyes,
Like a candle in the window,
Welcoming the weary traveler.
May the blessing of God's soft rain be on you,
Falling gently on your head
Refreshing your soul with the sweetness of little flowers newly blooming
May the strength of the winds of heaven bless you
Carrying the rain to wash your spirit clean
Sparkling after in the sunlight.
May the blessing of God's earth be on you
And as you walk the roads
May you always have a kind word for those you meet.
May you understand the strength and power of God in a
thunderstorm and winter
and the quiet beauty of creation
and the calm of a summer sunset
And may you come to realize
that insignificant as you may seem in this great universe
you ARE an important part of God's plan.
Walk in eternal beauty now, Mac. We all love you so very much.
25th December, 2008
Little Mac I was asked to post the following words to your tribute. No matter what happened there, I know you never stopped loving your country. I too regard on Ireland now as on my other homeland, just because of you, sweetie. I have never seen you, I will never know what brought us together, it still seems like a miracle but you will tell me one day. All my love, angel boy.
Christmas blessing from your human friends in Ireland
May the Irish hills caress you.
May her lakes and rivers bless you.
May the luck of the Irish enfold you.
May the blessings of Saint Patrick behold you.
Now sweetly lies old Ireland
Emerald green beyond the foam,
Awakening sweet memories,
Calling your heart back home.
New Year Eve
Happy New Year my little angel, have a wonderful day in animal heaven together with all your friends. I am leaving for the woods now, and when the clock strikes midnight I will be there at Puck's grave waiting for your spirit to fly by. I will look at the sky searching for the brightest star, knowing it is you. Love you little Mac, more than any words can tell.
1/24/2009
Little Mac, Maria Daines, a very popular singer from the UK with a golden heart wrote a special song just for you, baby. Like mine her heart was broken when she heard about your tragic life and most agonising dying. I can't think of the most beautiful tribute to you, my angel. May her words fill you with her and my love, may its tune be your forever lullaby, may all the anonymous and tortured babies at the bridge be comforted with peace and hope, and may this song keep us going with fighting to prevent such evil deed ever happen again.
Dear Maria, my heartfelt thanks to you and Paul. May God shower you both with His blessings. You are an inspiration to us all. xxxx
Little Mac now you have two resting homes. Good people from myspace wrote a tribute to you on their memorial site and visitors added some loving words. They also made a new picture of you, my beloved angel. I put it up here too, so that everyone can see what a beautiful doggie you are. Enjoy in Maria's wonderful song, so full of love and pain. Our fight for you goes on.....
Maria and Linda, thank you both for adding Mac at myspace:)
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