Welcome to Madison's Rainbow Bridge Memorial Residency

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Memories of Madison

Madison is the best thing that EVER happened to me. She Blessed my life for 7 years and 3 months. That little girl taught me a lot, was the keeper of my innermost thoughts, showed me how it felt to be truly loved unconditionally, was always by my side, and without fail gave me love bites on my hand EVERYTIME I came home -- even if it was just down to the store, was my napping partner always, was my security blanket, she showed me the simple joys of just going for a ride in the car, showing me that seeing my family at the end of the day was really all I needed, and in the end I have no doubt that she is now my little guardian angel in heaven now. She was all things to me so I cannot help but wonder where I go from here. There will never be another Madison in my life and that thought brings me crushing sorrow and complete emptiness. She's everywhere in my home, my thoughts, my dreams, and in my prayers. If I was on the couch watching tv she was on the couch with me, if I went up to bed she came with me -- it was her favorite place, even out on the back porch just enjoying the mornings - she was always there. My baby girl was everywhere with me for 7 years though ALL the ups and the downs and she pulled me through the trails and tribulations many times. She was my constant and I never thought about life without her. This is one small way to pay her tribute, appreciation, and show my undying love for her always. In the end the only thing I could do for her is give her the peace that she so rightfully deserved. It was THE hardest thing I've ever had to do baby girl but we were together in the beginning and we were together in the end. Your last gift to me was to leave me with Nestle - your first born son. He misses you terribly to but we have each other to remember you. He looks so much like you and has your beautiful soul inside of him too. Come and visit us if you can .... mama will be watching for you and so will your Nestle boy. Rest in peace my precious girl and I pray that you will be the first face I see when I cross over when my time comes. ------- 10/14/07 -- Dear Madison ... I miss you so much baby girl. This past week has been so hard without you. I got the call today that your ashes will be coming home on Tuesday. What is left of your Earthly body will be home and near to me. Somehow this does bring me comfort. There have been so many nice people who have sent me emails and sympathy cards this past week and it has helped me through tremendously. Lexi even brought some flowers over and some friends from my work sent some flowers as well. There have been sympathy cards come in the mail too. Everyone has been supportive and they all know how much I'm missing you. I've been walking each night with Nestle and he likes it and so do I. It's good therapy for us and gets us out of the house even if for just a little bit. I took him to PetCo and PetsMart to get him some new toys -- you know how the boy loves his toys. The babies we told you about are here now - you would have loved them so much. I named the little girl "Dolly" after your papered namme "Dolly Madison". She shows me a lot of your spirit and the little boy shows me a lot of your compassion and sweetness (even though they aren't Shar-Pei). I wish you were here to see them .... you loved their smell each time I came home from visiting them - you would get so excited. I'm going back to work tomorrow for the first time since you left last week. It's going to be hard but it's time for me to get back now. I hope you are doing wonderfully in Heaven's Bridge and have met many new friends to keep you company. I think of you everyday and keep your candle lit on your residency. Good night my Maddy, I love you baby girl -- Mama and your boy Nestle ------- 10/20/07 - Hi Baby Girl ... I think about you all the time and miss you so deeply. I close my eyes and imagine my nose snuggled up in front of your ear or just behind it, or laying on the couch with me keeping my feet warm, and it's almost like you are still here with me - until I open my eyes. Your ashes are back home with me now and I have them in the family room where we spent most of our time. I held them to my heart and just sat on the stairs and cried because I miss you so much but your Earthly remains have come full circle and you are back home with me now. Aunt Sue sent a beautiful card with a Poem that's titled "I'm Not Gone". It's been a really hard week back at work and I'm under a lot of stress because our project schedule has slipped. I sure could have used your kisses and hugs this past week. I come home and hug your Nestle boy though. He and I have given each other a lot of comfort since you had to leave. I hope you are happy and healthy - I know you are because God could never forgot a sweet, precious girl like you. I still watch for you in case you can drop by for a visit sometime. I have a 'feeling' you've been here several times to visit and check on things but I haven't SEEN anything. I hope for what is desired but I trust in what I can't see. I hope you've found a great pillow in the soft clouds up there - you LOVED pillows so much. Maddy, you sleep good, play hard, and know that I love and miss you more than I could ever say in mortal words. Love you sweet baby ... Mama and your Nestle Boy 10/27/07 - Hi My Maddy. I think of you everyday and miss you so, so much. I have your picture on my screensaver at work so I see you first thing and say good morning and I see you the last part of my evenings to say goodnight when I log off. It helps because you are with me and I still feel you as strongly as ever in my heart. Your Zack boy turned 18 years old since I last visited you here on the Bridge. I wish you could have been here to give him your sweet birthday kisses. I'll always be his mama but I now have to him go out into the world to make his own life and make his own decisions. I always thought you would be here beside me as the kids started to leave the home nest. Please watch over him from Heaven Maddy and help to guide him in the right direction as he finds his path in life. You always loved the kids so much, were protective of them, and loved to go in the car and get them from school or a friends house. You would cock your head at me and wag your tail so fast when I'd ask you if you wanted to go with me to pick up the kids. You knew what I was saying all the time. The babies are getting bigger and little Pablo is so sweet and cuddly. He has helped me so much when I need to cuddle as we used to. Connie has taken to being the 'mama' around them since you are not here so that they behave themselves when they get a little too rambunctious. It's really cute to watch but I'm sure you are also watching from above. I have found a beautiful necklace that will allow me to place some of your ashes within. This way I can always have you near my heart even by necklace -- you are already always within my heart so you will be inside and outside my heart wherever I go now. I still watch for any sign that you've visited but haven't seen anything yet. Please visit if you can. It will be 3 weeks on Monday that I had to let you go to your peaceful loving new home on the Bridge. I know that you must be very busy making all those new friends and that you are feeling so good now - like you did when you were a puppy - that makes me happy and eases my soul. I MISS YOU Madison....mi Maddy. Nestle and I send out kisses, BIG HUGS and cuddles to you ... We love and miss you always, Mama and Nestle 11/4/07 - Hi Maddy ... I think about you everyday, several times a day and hope you know how much I miss you. I have never missed someone so much as I miss you. Halloween was so different this year without you to help me hand out the candy to all the kids....you were always there to half protect and the other half intrigued with what all the little kids looked like. Nestle helped me this year and was such a good boy doing it. He didn't try to run out the door and he didn't bark at the kids. He only wanted to go out on the front porch and wag his tail at all the kids. I think he was trying to fill your shoes for the festivities with the kids. I feel you with me alot these days, in the tenderness of little Pablo, in the closeness I have with Nestle, in watching over what is happening with the kids, and seeing you in my dreams. I'm very greatful for that but I do miss touching you and cuddling. Are you happy where you are? I wish I knew what your days are like. It will be 4 weeks tomorrow that you had to leave. Sometimes I wonder if a Sunday night will ever happen that I don't think of our last night together. I love you sweet baby girl and I miss you everyday but know that you are in a better place with no pain anymore. I thank God for that and continue to pray for the day that you and I will be together again. You take care, play hard, take naps, and make new friends everyday. Come see me if you can - I'm still waiting here with Nestle. Love you forever and miss you infinity ... Mama and Nestle 11/17/07 Hi Maddy....I'm sorry it's been a little while since I've been to the Bridge to visit you but know that I think of you every single day and every night before going to sleep. I still miss you so much baby girl. There is a part of me that died with you I feel. It does get a bit easier each day but I still have this aching feeling in my heart. Grandma and grandpa are celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary and I'm here in Laughlin with them so they could come out of town - you know they can't drive this far without someone. It's nice to spend this time with them but I've found myself thinking of you even while here. Nestle is doing good and is enjoying his walks and runs with Zack, Chelsea, and me. The new babies are getting bigger. I wish they could have known you. Have you found Mystic at the Bridge too? I got the word that she went blind and came to the Bridge a little over a year ago. If you see her, give her a kiss from mama and tell her I love her. Then tell her to do the same to you. Have you found Handsome and Traveler too? How about Sugars and her mama Bubbles? And Misty and Ridges? Your beloved little Raisan should be there too. When I think of all those precious ones you and I have loved being there with you it does ease my mind that you are with them. You, Sugars, and Mystic -- you were MY girls. The kids are doing fine. Chelsea has a boyfriend now ... you would like him, remember John? He's good for her and protects and watches over her. Nestle likes him too and he likes them too. Zack is hardly home anymore and I worry for him on the motorcycle but I believe you will watch over him for me and keep him safe. I miss him alot. I lost you and Zack is moving into his adult life now so there is a sense of loss there as well.....it's different but it's still a lonliness. Sweet Chelsea stay close to me though ... she's got such a good heart and soul. She's really growning into quite the young lady. She pays alot of attention to Nestle. I carry you with me everyday Maddy and love you as much today as I ever did even though you are not physically with me ... I feel you with me everyday. It will be 6 weeks this Monday that you had to leave me. My Thanksgiving prayers this year will include you at the Bridge and I will make sure to give your boy Nestle you helping of the turkey this year and every year after. I miss you baby girl, more than I can express. Love you always, Mama and Nestle Boy 11/25/07 -- Hi Madison ... You've been on my mind alot this Thanksgiving weekend. I really miss you baby girl. Christmas is now quickly coming up and I will miss you even more. Chelsea took her driving permit test yesterday and didn't pass. She missed by one question. I felt so bad for her but she gets to try again tomorrow. If you can send your sweet thoughts to her tomorrow I know it would help her along with her retest. I hope you know how much I love you and that you are happy and peaceful. I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving at the Bridge with all your new friends and your family there. I miss you sweet baby girl, your spirit lives within my heart, and I love you very much. Love you always, Mama 12/7/07 - Hi Maddy....Are you getting ready for Christmas at the Bridge? We are going to put up our tree this weekend and decorate the inside of the house. It's raining this weekend so we can't put up the outside decorations but Papa and I will get to it. I got little Pablo and Dolly Christmas outfits to wear on Christmas Eve and they look so cute in them. I miss you sweetie and wish you could be with us this Christmas. You will be missed very, very much and I will be thinking of you but I know your spirit is alive inside my heart. I've placed a pretty poinsetta here on your site and still have your candle burning. I pray that you understand why I had to let you go baby ... you were suffering so and holding on only for me. I worry that you might be mad at me or don't understand why I did what I did for you that day in early October...the 8th to be exact. If I knew that there was another way to make you well I would have gone to the ends of the Earth to do it - but I tried everything I could with the doctors to save you. It would have been selfish of me to let you suffer even for one more hour. So, this Christmas season will be difficult here but I know that you are where the truest meaning of Christmas is. It must be wonderful. I love you baby girl - Mama 12/16/07 -- Hi Maddy! I hope our Ripley boy has found you? He came over to the bridge last Friday afternoon ... he got sick baby girl. I think he missed you so much...you were both puppies together. I told him you would be waiting for him and that he would have no more pain. The whole situation opened up raw wounds from 2 months ago when I loss you in the same way ... Ripley pass as gently in my arms as gently as he loved us all his whole life. I hope you are licking his big old ears like you always loved to do. I'm sure you are because you would have been so happy to see him. Give him a kiss for me and have him give one to you from me too. Love each other and show him around there on the bridge Maddy -- he can play now like he did when he was just a pup. I love you both and miss you terribly. Love always, Mama 12/26/07 - Merry Christmas my sweet baby girl. I hope you are having a beautiful first Christmas at the Bridge. You are in my thoughts and prayers, as always and I miss you very much this Christmas. I put your red and green treats with you and of course a little Santa Clause next to you. My God hold you close and give you Blessed Christmas kisses until you and I see each other again. I love you Maddy .. Merry Christmas baby girl...Mama 1/1/2008 -- Happy New Year Maddy girl! 2007 is now gone and 2008 begins. I wish you all the love and happiness that I know that Heaven bestows upon you and that you always know how much I love you forever - no matter how many New Year's pass, you are always with me in my heart, my soul, and my life. I gave our Nestle boy extra kisses tonight at midnight and we brought the New Year in together. We exchanged kisses for you too. I love you baby girl....Mama and Nestle 3/13/08 - I've been away too long baby girl. By now, you know that my mother passed away and I find some meaning and reason to why you had to leave me. You left so that you could be there to meet your grandma (my mother) and be her kindrid companion as she passed over the Bridge. You also know now that she chose my birthday to passover. I now have her beloved puppy, Chico living with us here to comfort me in the absence of mom. He picked her and she picked him and now he is with me and you are with her in Heaven. Give her your special kisses and love her forever as I do from here ... both of you. I had 3 very special ladies in my life...mom, Chelsea, and you. I've lost 2 of you in the last 6 months and I'm devastated and miss you both beyond words. I do find comfort knowing that you are together. Take precious care of one another until we are all together again. I love you and miss you Maddy...Mama 9/16/08 - Hi Maddy! We are quickly approaching a full year since you had to leave and I still think of you always. It doesn't seem that a year has past already. How are you and grandma doing? I hope that you are close together and that you both are happy and free. I feel you both with me all the time. It's not the same without you but I'm learning to live with your different presence in my everyday life. The hurt is fading but I still miss you something fierce. Kisses to you and big hugs baby girl! I miss you and love you always! -- Mama 10/8/08 - My Dear Madison, Today has been 1 year that we have been apart and I still miss you as much as I always have. I think about you always but you already know that don't you? I pray that you and my mom are watching over one another and that you are to one another what each of you were to me while on this Earth. I've come to realize that you will always be with me - just in a different manner until I cross over and we can be together again. Until then, I think you have sent little Pablo to me so that I'm not alone. He is a very special little boy and he loves me and stays right with me just as you did for so many years. Thank you baby girl - only you truly know what that means to me. You Nestle boy is doing great - I think he misses having another sharpei in the family but he loves to take car rides with me and stands on the console just as you used to do. He's such a special boy to me -- your legacy our first puppy together. I'm so thankful that he is here with me and staying healthy. He'll be 8 years old in November -- remember that day he came into our lives?? :) You were such a GREAT mama to the puppies and that is only another testiment to how special you have always been. Today, you run and play hard as you have a whole year's worth of friends that are with you now and you are no longer the 'new kid on the block' at the Bridge. Celebrate you life today and always Maddy, as I will do too - you are a very, very special soul and I carry you in my heart, my memories, and my life forever. I miss you and I love you more than I could ever express into words. Love you always -- Mama and your Nestle boy 12/23/08 -- Dearest Madison, this marks our 2nd Christmas apart from one another and I miss you as much today as I did the day you left. I know that you will be with my mom for Christmas this year, right by her side - her forever friend. Please give each other a kiss and hug from me this Christmas and know that I remember, cherish and love you both forever. Merry Christmas baby girl and don't forget to tell Jesus Happy Birthday. I miss you Maddy! Love you always, Mama 9/14/09 -- My Dear Maddy, I'm so sorry it's been so long since I've written my thoughts of you - I do think of you everyday and see your sweet face in my office everyday with the pictures of you I have on my desk and pined to my cubicle wall. I know you understand why I've been away so long -- I've been so consumed in taking care of my dad (your grandpa) through his illness and his passing on 6/16/09. Now he is with you and mom in Heaven also and I hope you were beside mom to greet him upon his crossing over. It's been 2 years of tremendous losses that started with you on 10/8/07. You went first my sweet baby to make sure that the rest of those whose time was closely approaching could be safe, loved, and looked over when they arrived. Next time you see my mom and dad would you please give them a big kiss from their baby girl and let them know how much I miss them. I have a little bit of their ashes next to yours in a safe place where I can still have an earthly reminder that you were all here with me physically at one time. You boy, Nestle, will be 8 years old this November and you will be happy to know that he is very healthy and still brings me incredible comfort -- he resembles you so much. I took him to see Dr. Anderson and his bloodwork shows no signs of decline with any organ functions. He has pearly while teeth and very clean ears now because I had them all cleaned up so he would continue to stay healthy! Little Pablo continues to be my constant companion and I still truly believe that there is so much of you in him. He's my little security blanket at my neck at every chance he gets, he takes naps with me as you did, and he came into my life so soon after you left. I know you made sure he'd be with me when you were gone and I thank you so much for that. I love you Madison and I still miss you so very much but I can still feel you with me and all I need to do is close my eyes and I can still smell you and feel your sweet touch next to me. Be happy and please drop by to visit if you get a chance! Love you always baby girl -- Mama 10/8/10, My Dear Precious Madison - Today marks 3 whole years since you and I had to part. I think of you alot and especially on this day. I still miss you very, very much but I know that you are in Blessed company with mom, dad, and Sugars. Your Nestle Boy is still going strong but his eyes are starting to get very cloudy but he's still just one big baby. :) He'd be a lap dog if he could and he still snores LOUD - just like you. I love you sweetie, I miss you, and wait for me -- I'll be there someday and we'll see each other again. Love you always my baby girl -- Mama 2/19/11, Hi My Dear Maddy! I miss you and have been thinking so much about you. Especially last week when I went to visit Mama Kathi and I got to see Enya! She and my Nestle Boy are the last 2 left of the original sweethearts that Kathi and I started out with. Enya is 13 years old Madison!! She's still as pretty as ever but moving very slowly, her sight and hearing are fading but she's still a lover. Your Nestle is now 10 years old and 4 months old! He still acts like a pup sometimes and still LOVES to go for rides 'bye-bye' just as you did. He might have another shot at being a daddy later this year and you can be sure that mama, Zack, or Chelsea will keep one of his puppies - which are your puppies too! I've met the little girl that would have the puppies - her name is Persipany and she is a chocolate just like you and Nestle. In fact, mama Kathi sent me a picture of her the other day and I swear I was looking at YOU!! It gave me chills. She's beautiful -- just as you are. You would be excited, today I'm taking Chelsea out to Kathi's to being home a beautiful 4 year old girl named, PINK. Chelsea is so excited to have PINK as her own and she wants nurture her for the same type of bond you and I had together. She talks about you when she talks about PINK. I hope you are happy and thank you for your little 'visit'. I knew it was a sign from you and it made me very, very happy. Please give Sugars, Traveler, Handsome, Allegro, Mystic, Misty, and of course, our big Ripley a kiss from mama and have them ALL give one to you back!! I miss you Maddy and you still live forever in my heart, soul, and memories. I LOVE YOU!! Mama and Nestle Boy 9/26/11 -- My Dear Madison, I think of you so often and still miss you always. Our boy Zack left 3 weeks ago today and joined the Army. I miss him so much. My prayer is that you will watch over Z-man always and keep him safe in this crazy, crazy world. You always protected both Chelsea & Zack with love and such passion - they need you to watch over them now more than ever my sweet Maddie. Nestle is doing good ... he'll be 11 in November! Can you believe YOUR first born will be 11?? He's slowing down a bit, very hard of hearing, and his eyes are glazing but he troops onward and still loves his rides in the car. :) I love you Madison and be happy and ageless my sweet girl. Love and miss you infinity squared paradox! Mama

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