July 10th 2014 9 years have passed and still it hurts just like it did then.
Love is what you are. You are the meaning of love. LOVE DROPS will flow until we are together again.
Momas baby girl ,sky blue eyes you loved your dolly, your soccer ball, to play in water, food, go bye bye, you sang little songs. Her grunts, her teddy bear, her morning biskets, Christmas she loved her presents and would open them with excitement. She smiles. Pretty little smiles. Clean little eyes. Your big backyard, Your home, You loved to go bye bye but loved to come back to your home. Watched everything I did. You knew the difference when I would say Momma has to go to work or momma has to go to the store. You knocked at the back door when wanting back in. When I would come home you would go get your dolly (a rope toy). You would always bring me a prize, a leaf or a pine cone or a stick or anything that was available at the time a piece of paper. When I cooked you would set and watch me the whole time. At night you would go to bed like a person on your own. You loved it when I would get out all the yard tools you would get so excited as you knew I would be outside for a while working in the yard. All I had to do is get my yard shoes out. Clean Clean, washing the car. You loved it because water would be involved. You had the most beautiful sky blue eyes and when outside all you could see is white eyes in the middle of all that black hair. You was a short hired baby black with a patch of white on your chest. Short front legs and back legs longer. You had flying nun ears I called them. So very smart. My baby.
Such a well behaved baby. Almost human. You knew every word I said. There are so many things to tell. 11 years worth. You were born from a mother that was left behind by neighbors. I used to feed the mother. The mother had the babies in the woods behind the home. Another neighbor's little girl got the babies and took them to her house the home of a mean man. He took the mother off some where later when the pups where old enough. I was working in my yard and heard pups crying. No one was at home at the time so I went over to look, two pups in the back of an old truck no food or water. I took some to them. My son came home age 17, It is just me and him I told him there are two pups in the back of that truck one with sky blue eyes. He went to see. He came back with her. He says I'm keeping her. The next day that mean man came to my house. He says you want to keep that dog? I say yes he said you better keep it in your yard. I say Mr.! you dont know me! I take care of what is mine! You will never have the chance to take this one off and dump it somewhere like you did her mother and if you do not get out of my yard I will report you to the SPCA! the other pup was taken out of the back of the truck by the mean man and it would go up and down the street crying looking for his sister or his mom. We took him in too. We found him a home.
I had you spayed at 6 months. You hurt your leg one time I had to take her to emergency hospital at 10:00 pm you pulled a ligamant and had to stay all night. I had to have moles cut off and tumors twice. You looked like a pot belly pig up until 2005. When got sick May 2005. June 24th was taken to doctor with what I thought was a kidney infection and is what she was treated for. I had to take her back again. July 8th I had to go get more medication. I'm thinking it takes time for it to get into her system good as the doctor said. Hurricane Dennis is coming Sat 7/9/05. I take her back to Doc again. More shots. You are not eating or drinking. I pack up and we go to my mom & dads to wait out the hurricane. You keeps wanting to tt and keep squatting and nothing is coming out I keep thinking the Doc says give the medication time. You sleep with me and all along I know you are hurting. Sunday 7/10/05. All day same thing over & over and it is raining I keep drying you off still has not drank or eaten. I think to myself there is something more then an infection. That evening I set in a chair and she by me. You start shaking. The curfew is lifted. I tell mom I'm taking you home where you are more at ease. I load the car up. it is 6:30 about. You can not get into the back seat. I pick your back side up and lift you in on your blanket. We leave 20 min. to our house. You get sick and throws up I keep saying it's ok honey moma is taking you home. I had to drive slow because the roads are wet and limbs and trash in the road from the winds of the hurricane. On the way home I call my son Shane to say Mesha is not doing good.
I get home get all things out of the car you can not get out.
Your eyes are so very big now you are so swollen. I can not pick her up you are too heavy ( by the way) you went from 54 lb to 43 lb in just a few days and that doctor never questioned that either. It is 7:30 pm now. Shane gets home. You are spiting something, You look at us saying please help me I do not know what is wrong I'm so scared. I run in and call that doctor you might know I had to leave a message . He is not calling back fast enough so I call an emergency hospital. While on the phone with them they are telling me $$ to just come in I say I don't care I have to bring her can I bring her in? then I hear her cry out Shane comes to the door says never mind she is gone. I ask the man if I can bring her in anyway, Shane is saying never mind mom she's gone. I hang up on the man. Shane says he kept cleaning her little mouth and she just acted like she did not know him ( she went into schock ). I went out there she is in the back seat of my car her little head laying down , Shane says I had to close her eyes. I do not want to except it.
We check her out no heart beat. There lay my precious girl that I thought I tried to help and would let no harm ever come to her. Lifeless. the phone rang it was her doctor I told him never mind now she is gone. My baby took her last car ride.
Her last bye bye. Mommas Mee Mee. Oh my Mee Mee...my baby.
I could not figure out what happened, what went wrong? She was berried in one of the places she loved out back next to Maggie.
It all happened so fast. I never knew about kidney failure until a day or two later. I called that doctor and made an appt. to talk to him. He said there is no way to tell with out having ran test on her. ** HELLO ** why did he not do that back in June.
It is all still too hard for me to except and now it is 7 months ago today at abt 7:45 pm today. Your brain was still good your eyes was still good but something happened to you inside. My baby can no longer lay out in the yard and look up at the trees and smell the air and see and hear the birds. To lay in the sunshine. I miss you so bad I almost did not want to live anymore
I miss having her to take care of. You were so much like a child
You were so special. I have had smart dogs before but this one was something else. I love that baby with all of my being. I want to hold her so bad.
Mommas Mee Mee , Mommas baby Thats Mommas Girl I love you my darling. Mommy is so so sorry. I tried to get you help sweetheart, I failed. Mommy did not know anything about Kidney Failure. I never heard of it and never even thought of it. I was just doing what the Doctor , the man I trusted for your health, said to do. I never ever would have let any harm come to you. Mommy is so sorry baby I love you so much.
You have the most beautiful eyes, Your black hair shined and so pretty. Your have the most beautiful face. You are so smart,
Mommy is so so very sorry baby, my love, my precious heart.
My girl. I will never forget your smiles. Her had pretty little smiles.
My precious I'm so sorry you took your last bye bye July 10th 2005. When I was standing there looking at you, you looked at me saying Mom what is wrong, I don't understand, what is happening to me please help me. My darling mommy is so sorry. My baby I would have never let anything happen to you but this was beyound my control I tried to get help and I failed. I had no idea what was happening. I miss you sweetie and I will be with you again one day my love. I'm so sorry I failed you.
You looked to me for everything.
I will never forget the day you came into our life. Shane got
you and brought you into our home which became your home.
You became a big part of our life. Shane age 17 had never had a dog of his own so I agreed to let him keep you.
When he moved out in 1999 you did not understand where he went. It was just you and me now. All the memories. Dear God.
When he would leave to go to school or work you watched from the front door. See Shane leave. Mommies Mee Mee. You would always set and look out the door or at the back door
looking around the corner of the house watching for him to pull up in the driveway. Your Shane. You would get so excited.
The greetings that you gave when we would come home are missed.
2005 Thanksgiving you are not with us, the 1st one without you.
December 25, 2005 our first Christmas without you in 11 years.
We had no tree, no decorations. It just hurts too bad to not have you with us. You loved Christmas so much.
2/21/06 She loves Spring time. Spring will be here soon.
I love you baby. Happy belated Valentines my precious.
2/25/06 Your uncle Brett visited you today baby. Your Shane
and I miss you so much. We love you Mee Mee.
March 10th 2006: Oh my darling, You have been gone from me 8 months now and Mommy's heart is still broken. I miss you so very much. Last year at this time you were with me. We had your 11th birthday. Now this month is your 12th birthday and I can I can not hug you or kiss you I can not love on you.
Mommy is so so very sorry but the tears just will not stop.
Oh my sweet sweet baby. I'm so sorry you had to hurt.
Mommy did not know what was happening. I tried to get you
help. Please forgive me my love. I always protected you
and would never ever let any harm come to you. Oh baby the
look in your eyes at the last minutes of your life are fixed
in my mind forever. Oh baby mommy is so sorry. I love you
forever and always. You will always be my little girl. You
were always such a good girl and so very smart. There is no
other like you. When you were made the mold was broken.
I love you darling always your mommy.
March 30,2006 This is your Springtime precious. Mommy sees you Mommy watches you from the back door. My precious girl.Mommy loves you forever and forever. This is the first Spring without you since 1994 when you came in to our lives as little baby. Your Shane loves you and misses you too. You are mommy's heart.
April 10th 2006 This day you have been gone from me 9 months now
Precious sweet baby girl of mine. I love you so so much.
4/16/06 Happy Easter baby the 1st one with out you in 12 yrs
5/10/06 10 months baby. You have been gone from me. I miss you and love you so much.
5/14/06 Mothers day,1st one with out you on this 12th yr.
Oh my baby, my sweet girl I love you.
6/10/06 11 months ago I lost you my precious. Oh but it seems like yesterday. Thank you for loving me so much , you will forever and always be in my heart . Momma loves you sweetheart
July 10th 2006: 6:45 pm you left me 1 year ago today. My heart still breaks, what is left of it.
September 10, 2006 My baby girl 14 months today. Still my heart is broken. You are with me everyday sweetheart. Mommas girl.
Nov.23 2006 Thanksgiving with out you a second time since you left me. It is not the same with out you my heart. I love you
Dec. 25,2006 Our second Christmas with out you my sweet girl and still we had no tree no decorations. We just can't do it.
You are and forever will be my heart my sweet little girl.
Mommy loves you baby. Mommy loves you. Your Shane loves you.
You have been gone from us now 1 year and 5 months.
Jan. 1, 2007: Happy New Year mommas sweet Mee Mee it's not
the same without you. Your Shane& mommy loves you.
Jan. 10, 2007: 1 1/2 sweetheart, this one is hitting me hard baby.
real hard. I'm sorry baby. Mommy is so sorry.
Feb. 10, 2007 1 year and 7 months baby, you have been gone from
me. I will never stop missing & loving you.
2/14/07 Happy Valentines day mommas sweet girl.
3/2/07 Friday night, you came to visit me you let me know you was there with the sweet smell of flowers. I was in my closet. You knew mommy was going out. And you set in the entrance to that closet. I smelled the flowers. I got in the car and as I was going down the road I smelled that sweet smell again, You were in the back seat as you always were when we went somewhere. And too where you passed and took your last car ride.
I miss you mommas sweet girl . that's mommas girl I love you so much. My tears are for you. xoxoxoxox
3/10/07 1 year and 8 months you have been gone from me
I love you sweetheart. I love you.
3/25/07 My sweet baby you have turned 13 today. It is your
Birthday. Happy birthday mommas sweet girl.
4/8/07 My second Easter without you. I miss you. xoxoxox
4/10/07 You have been gone from me now 1 yr and nine months
My heart still breaks. Spring is here baby.
4/25/07 Mesha oh honey Baby came to the bridge tonight at 9:30
He always wondered where you have been. Now he knows.
We had Baby for 15 yrs. You did not care for him but he
sure loved you and now I know you love him because there
is nothing but pure love there and Baby will always be
with you now and your sister Maggie.
I love you babies, mommy loves you so much, SO MUCH.
5/10/07 Mesha 22 months have gone by now. Mommy will always love
you. Watch after Baby he loves you. xxxxxx
12/25/07 Merry Christmas mommas sweet girl, this being the 3rd one without you. I know you are with me in one way or another baby.
I love you so so very much. xoxoxo
May 10, 2007 Mesha darling love of mine, Baby has been with you two weeks now. He left this world 4/26/07 He loves you sweetie. He is little so take care of him. Mommy loves you my darlings.
July 10th 2007 it is 6:45 pm you left me 2 yrs ago today. I love you my darling.
I love you more today then yesterday. The pain will be with me always. I miss you my sweet girl. That's mommas girl.
03/25/08 Happy 14th birthday darling my sweet girl xoxox
07/10/08 3 yrs Oh honey, mommy is here, I will always be here sweetie. I know baby,
do not fret , mommy has not left you, I will never leave you. You are my heart.
11/27/08 Thanksgiving without you again my love.... it will never be the same.
12/25/08 Merry Christmas darling, you love Christmas so much. It will never be the same with out you. I still can not put a tree up.
1/1/2009 3 yrs and 6 months, Happy New Year my sweet girls. each day is the same, never stop missing you my blue eyed sweet girl, mommy loves you. Please tell Baby I love him and will never forget him either give him a kiss for mommy, and Maggie Mae too.
2/10/09 3yrs and 7 months have passed I still miss you sweetheart. I still cry for you.
2/14/09 happy Valentines day darling xoxox you are my valentine.
3/25/09 Happy 15th birthday darling. Have fun at your birthday party. I love you my sweet girl xoxo
07/10/09 4 years now without your precious living being in our home, will never be the same. 4 yrs
All this time has passed and still my heart is broken. Mommy will never stop missing you.
The love drops will never stop flowing for you. You are my # one baby.
Baby our bird is with you. He sings his song for you.
9/16/09 5 yrs ago Hurricane Ivan and you were with me darling. Mommy loves you xoxoxoxoxox
11/26/09 My 4th Thanksgiving without your precious body being with me.
I miss you all the more that will never stop my sweet baby girl. Mommy loves that girls oh yes she does! Happy Thanksgiving my sweet love, my heart , my soul. Have a good time at your Thanksgiving today at the Bridge. Give Baby a kiss tell him mommy loves him and Maggie Mae too. My heart will always over flow with love for you my precious darling Mesha. xoxoxoxoxox
*** Max oh darling we love you Shane and I. I'm so sorry sweet sweet boy (((MAX))) xox 12/1/09
12/24/09 Oh my sweet girls, my 4th Christmas with out your precious body here on earth with me.
Mommy cried again yesterday as I put your little Christmas tree next to you. I said to
you, it's Christmas my darling, you love Christmas. Love drops fall. I will never stop missing
you. Have fun with your Christmas at the Bridge my darling. My heart my love. xoxoxo Mommy
12/31/09 4 years 5 months my 4th Christmas and 4th New Year with out you here to hold.
Max is with you and Baby and Maggie Mae. Happy New Year darling at the Bridge.
Christmas was sad with the memory of you at the Christmas tree knowing you had presents.
I cried out for you. I heard you grunting by my bed, wanting me to get up as you needed to go
outside and you was ready for me to get up. I love you my darling sweet girls. You are mine forever. Forever my heart. xoxoxox
Jan.1st 2010 >> Happy New Year my precious baby girl xoxoxox I love you soooooooo much.
March 25, 2010 Happy 16th birthday my sweet girls, yes hers is! that's momma's sweet girls!
Happy Spring darling you love Spring. 16 years ago today you were born in the woods. A month and a half later you were pluked out of the back of a truck and brought into your
forever loving home. I remember and it seems just like yesterday. Have a gret time at you birthday party my sweet precious girl. Mommy loves you xoxoxoxoxoxox
APRIL 4th, 2010 Happy Easter my sweet girls that's moma's sweet girls her's sure is.
I miss you my sweet girl, soooo much. loving you is forever in my heart.
12/5/2010 Oh No Baby I'm so sorry I thought I came on July 10th your 5 yr marker, Oh how could I not have came Oh baby my sweet girl mommy is so sorry. I did not forget you, I just did not come to you on that day, Mommy is so sorry honey. Now Thanksgiving 11/25/2010 has passed and I did not come to you and I remembered you love the huge ham bone. Now it is the Christmas Season.
I still can not put up a tree or decorate. I took your new little brother Cotton and had his picture made with Santa and it was the same place and all the while I could only think abut when I took you to that same place and had your picture made with Santa. My heart cries out for you and will forever. I love you forever and always darling. Momm's sweet girls yes her's. xoxoxox
12/25/2010 5 years without you on Christmas. Oh but my sweet girl I will never forget how you loved Christmas, your presents. Merry Christmas my sweet girl, that's moma's sweet girls. I love you baby. I can not say it enough. You are my heart.Merry Christmas darling.xoxoxo
12/31/2010 : The last day of 2010 5 years ago on July 10th 2005 I had no idea you would not being having another Christmas are new year with me. The pain is still so fresh. Oh Lord precious, mommy is so sorry. My love for you is as great as it was then and more so. Happy New Year at the Bridge my sweet sweet girls. Mommy loves that girls. xoxoxo
FEBRUARY 7TH 2011 6:45 PM Your Moddy , my Mommy passed away and I hope you see her
Oh the pain of it all.
March 25th 2011 Happy 17th birthday darling.
04/01/2011 oh sweetheart mommy's computer at home needs a modem. My mommy passed away 2/7/2011 and I remember the days I took you to her house. I love you sweetheart I have not forgot you,
I know you will see Moddy and you have ran to greet her. lightning struck our home 1/5/11 I have not been able to get on line. I'm sorry honey. I love you darling Easter is coming sweetheart.
4/24/2011 HAPPY EASTER MY DARLING I LOVE YOU FOREVER AND ALWAYS SWEETNESS. X0X0X
5/12/2011 Hello baby I got the computer fixed now ..I'm back baby. mommy is here.
6/25/2011 Love drops still fall for you. Nothing is nor will ever be the same in my life. I lost you and now my on mommy. Sometimes I can't handle the pain. I will love you always. Always.
7/10/2011 July 10 2005 the most terrible day for me, my sweet darling girl.. today you have been gone from me 6 years. It seems like yesterday. I will NEVER, stop hurting for you or missing you you will forever be moma's sweet girls yes hers will. I love you my darling xoxoxoxo
11/12/11 Thanksgiving is coming .. honey this is so hard for me. I don't have you or my Mother and is my first Thanksgiving without my mother. Baby you loved the holidays so much.
11/24/11 Thanksgiving day was so very hard for me I was alone that evening. Thoughts of you and My Momma , the holidays are so hard for me honey. I cry all the time.
12/1/2011 MAX 2 yrs ago you left. 2/1/2009. We love you
01/08/ 2012 * I came to you at your residency and signed your book on Christmas Eve. But I have not came until now to tell you Happy New Year sweetheart. 6 yrs. This year will be 7. I will forever need you and miss you. xoxoxo I love You darling.
MARCH 25 2012 Happy Birthday my darling Your 18th birthday I love you my darling
JULY 4TH 2012 It is Wednesday the 4th day of July and I love you and miss you all the more omg,it is about to be 7 years, and July 4th 2010 I still had my Moma it was July2010 when they told us they could do nothing, the cancer came back. OMG. I love you Sweet girl Mommy.
JULY 10, 2012 7 YEARS you have been gone from me in body yet your face remains before me. Your sky blue eyes stare into mine as they always did. The memories the love . one of a kind you were more human then fur baby dog. I love you my Mee Mee with all of my being xoxoxo
December 25, 2012 This my 7th Christmas with out you You love Christmas and you know you have gifts under the tree but you don't mess with them until Mommy pulls them out for you and I know you are doing the same up there except the Angels have to pull them out for you now. I love you my sweet girl xoxoxox Mommy
JAN. 1ST, 2013 Happy New Year Sweetheart. My sweet girl. have you seen MODDY yet your human Grandmother. xoxox My heart. I love you baby.
FEB. 14, 2013 HAPPY VALENTINES DAY BABY I LOVE YOU
MARCH 10 2013 HAPPY EASTER MY SWEET GIRL MOMMY LOVES YOU.
3/25/13 Happy 18th Birthday my precious I love you for always xoxoxo
7/4/13 Happy 4th of July sweetheart, your last one was 2005. Mommy loves you darling xoxox
7/10/13 8 yrs ago today you left us my sweet girl you are and forever will be so loved xoxox
03/25/2014 Happy 20th birthday my sweet little girl I love you to the moon and back xoxoxo
4/20/14 Happy Easter sweetheart. I love you xoxo give all others a hug me xoxoxo
7/4/2014 Happy 4th of July my precious sweet baby girl. Mommy loves you xoxoxox
JULY 10, 2014 Thursday At a little after 6 pm this afternoon Shane & I lost you 9 years ago.
It was hurricane Dennis day. July 10th 2005. at age 11. Now you are 20yrs old my beautiful sweet girl. Your Shane still can't talk about it. I still hurt. I love you precious heart and miss you all the more. xoxoxoxo