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Good By my Beloved Me-Me
by Stephanie Tia Calewarts
My beloved Me-Me 2 .....In Memory
My little girl was born on Feb 11,2001...and she passed away on Nov 12,2004.. I want to write here about her...her birth was very very diffacult...she had 2 bothers that didnt make it...and she had to be delivered by c-section...i remember that night all to well...her mom Hannah was in extream pain with labor....so i rushed her off the to the emergency vet for the c-section ... i got them home and moms milk didnt drop so i had them both in the welping room where I spent the next 2 weeks caring for them both...i kept Me-Me...on my chest between my breasts to keep her warm....mom layed next to me with her head on my shoulder watching her new little baby....for 2 weeks i bottle feed her and kept her going....she went into puppy fade about 3 days after birth and i kept her going by loving her and petting her little tummy...talking to her and feeding her...every 2 hrs...I stayed with her around the clock for 2 weeks till she got strong enuff to make with moms help...and she made it...as she was growing up she was a playfull pup...liking to get in to things ripping up toilet paper dragging out close from my room and such.....but always playfull...but that was Me-Me.....I wanted to show her but her bone structure wasnt heavy enuff so i decied to keep her for a brood bitch.....but still loving her emiensly non the less...we had a very special bond....she became my protector...my guard dog...and that i think she took to heart and was just her...at about 8 weeks of age she got stepped on by a guest and hurt her rear end....and i thought for sure she would be crippled for life....but she never showed any signs of it...she was a strong girl....as a pup she and buckwheat became close playmates and he adored her....he took to her as if it was his daughter...and looked out after her...those 2 were insepratable....as time went on i noticed a change in Me-Me i couldnt put my finger on as to why....she personanalty started to change....at the age of 2 she started to become agressive towards the other dogs....and for no reason i could identafy with....her older 1/2 sister toots was soon becoming her enamey...i soon learned that both dogs were alpha dominante and soon they would need to be kept seprated...they both demaned to be my favorate...shortly after the age of 2 she bit one of my girl friends in the hand causing some seriouas bit marks.....and this was the first time she ever bit.....we both put it off to her having a bad day...she was close to going into season so we attrubited it to that...i couldnt figure why she did that it was not like my little girl to do that...but again maybe cause she was going in to season....well she did go in to season shortly after that and i had her bred....but no luck...she didnt take....but to me she always remained faith full and devoted...so i waited for one season and had her bred again....again no luck....so the next seasom came along and she got preagent.....Woooo-Hoooo she was going to be a mom...i was so thrilled with that...as the weeks went by she seemed to glow...her coat was perfict....she gained some weight....she looked wonderfull...and she became so out going and loveable...she seemed to crave attention...and that she got me from me in abundance...and then some...we were both going to be moms...but at the 6th week of her term she aborted her pups...and she never was the same from that point on...she had 3 pups.....all still born...her agresstion became worse as the days went by.....i had to keep her septated from the rest of the dogs espicialy toots...they would kill each other given the chance...everything went down hill from there...so i put up a fence in the house to keep them apart...thats the only thing i could do....for her safety and for the others too....when she went into labor i tryed to help her in the birthing room....i had fresh cool water for her and light food to eat...i was stroking her in the birthing box as she was laying there and she bit my hand severly ....but i knew she wasnt feeling well ....so i let it go....but continued to help her and be with her....i wasnt going to be pushed away from her...she needed me and i was going to stay no matter what....and i did....well that time passed....Me-Me kept looking for her babys for weeks after wards....she went into a deep depression....with drawing from every thing around her....she seemd to act as if nothing matterd any more....she became very agressive towards Mariah....her grandmother and... also her best buddy from her younger days Buchwheat...so now i had to keep her seprated from all the dogs i just couldnt trust her any more to be with any of the dogs....she would attack them for no reason at all and a fight would break out...but i had to do it...my heart just sunk....still i loved her so much...she became distant from me to, wanting the affection i would show her...it was always on her terms...not mine.... buts ok...when i had food or was cooking in the kitchen she was always under foot begging for a tid bit of food and i would always toss her a piece or two....she could catch it in her mouth and eat it up inna heart beat...very rarly ever missing a toss to her...she was good at that...she liked everything i ate....yourgert,melon,onions...and any thing i would eat...she always was there for a sample...and she always got some...I would come home from work and if she was behind the fence i would let her out to go pee but she had to jump up on me for a hug and a kiss and a good scratch too...before she went out....if she was out on her own and i would come home she was at the front gate jumping up on it with her tail just a wagging waiting for my greating...her eyes were sparkling with happy emotions...and tail that was wagging so hard i just didnt know how she could stand on her back two paws...she remaind still devoted to me....my protector...we had, one day a couple come over here....and the guy wasnt of good nature a real loser and Me-me knew he could be trouble...she could sense it...she went threw the bedroom window to stop the guy....just to protect me...or some one would come knocking on the back door...she was right there to stop them and she did!!!....thats my girl...always trying to protect me...how she loved to be spoon fed right off my plate....and she took advantage of the too....she would always get the plates after dinner to clean off...she felt as if she was getting rewarded....for just bieng my protector and companion....well inna way she was...and i loved to spoil her...at night when it was time for bed she had her place....she loved her crate...she consiterd it her place for the night and she would sleep there till morning....morning would come and i would let her out for a morning pee and drink...she looked forward to that every day...i let her out and straight to the front door she would race.....i open the door for her and down she would go...come in and eat a nibble or two and a drink...she would be out from behind the fencing till Marie and me went to work then behind she would go...for the day...we get home and i would bring her out and the others behind the fence...as usual she was glad to us and gave us both big welcome home and out she would go....but after she got in we couldnt touch her...any attempt to she would growel at us and put her head down and walk away....she didnt want to be touched...then on November 10, 04 i was at the computer with my hands lowerd towards the floor and she was walking by....she turned and with out any warning she attacked my hand...and bit it real bad...i grabded her and put her behind the fence..she knew she did wrong...i took care of my hand....and at that point i new i lost control...and it was time to say good bye...so i called the vet and made arrangements for her to be put to sleep...it was the hardest call i ever had to make....all the following day Me-Me....avoided me.....she was riddled with guilt and shame....and she knew it...she looked at me many times as if to say she was sorry and i believe her....but for some reason i knew she couldnt control her behavor...i just knew it in my heart...our last day together was filled with pain and tears....we enjoyed a cup of yourgert together...and she had some treats....marie and me groomed her....giving her a show ring cut and look....cause thats the kind of chow she was at heart...she was trying to tell me the end is here and please help me...so we got her collar and her leash we walked around the yard......she sniffed in the leaves....barked at the squarils...we got in the car and she wanted the the whole back end and she got it...looking out the windows she didnt miss a thing...totaly enjoying the ride...we got to the vets...it was in the early evening sun setting in the west....not a cloud in the sky...the day its self was sunny but cool...her type of day...I told her how much i love her and held her close to my heart....whispering in her ear...as she fell asleep and crossed that rainbow bridge....Me-Me I love you for eternity....
Comments would be appreciated by the
author, Stephanie Tia Calewart
321-784-1468 Tech Support
