Every dog has a special way of capturing your heart. Ozzy was a very special dog with a very laid back and clownish personality. The thing I will remember the most about him is when he would be in my lap and lay his head across my chest or on my face. I always took this as a sign of trust and love.

Out of our five Dachshunds, Ozzy was the biggest, weighing between 17-19 lbs. I was worried he would injure his back if he walked up any stairs, so what my husband and I would do, is carry him upstairs before we went to bed or went upstairs in general. Ozzy got used to this. So when we would get ready for bed, while we were turning off lights, etc., the other dogs already upstairs waiting on us, Ozzy would be at the first step waiting for us to pick him up and take him upstairs to go to bed. This became a nightly ritual and a memory that I will always have. Ozzy was buried on May 16th, 2012. He was buried in our backyard, right in front of the steps that lead up to our deck.

I recall a recent blog I posted on my Tumblr page from December 13, 2011:

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A Dog Can Change Your Life

I watched Marley and Me tonight. The movie gets me every time - I can't see to watch it without crying in the end. The movie is great though and if you are a dog lover, you probably appreciate it as much as I do.

I try to think of my life without my dogs and I can't. It's like thinking of my life without Brandon. Brandon is my heart and soul and I would be lost without him. I feel the same about my dogs. Some people may think I'm crazy, but those people have never owned a dog. And if you are a dog owner and don't feel that way, then you need to truly open your heart to your dog. I believe dogs enrich our lives and make them whole. Dogs love you unconditionally and will always be there for you.

Bonnie will be 5 this December and she is already sprouting grays hairs below her mouth. I remember getting off the bus from my third deployment and meeting her for the first time. It was an instant bond and a moment I will cherish the rest of my life. She is definitely MY dog and a canine epitome of me.

I know the time will come when I will have to say goodbye to my fur babies. I know I won't be ready. But I'm fortunate to have Brandon by my side to help me through it because it will be heart-breaking.

In the meantime, I'll continue to live happily with my loving husband and my 5 crazy, lovable dogs.

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I can't help but get teary-eyed every time I think of Ozzy or see his picture. I feel like a piece of my heart is missing. I know that I have to move on and instead of dwelling on his death, I need to celebrate his short life with us.

To be continued...

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April 22, 14 - I miss you and love you Big Boy.

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November 23, 2014 - Still thinking of you and wishing you were here with us. I love you Ozzy.

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April 21, 17 - Still miss you everyday. Wish you were still here with us so you could meet your new brother, Oscar, and sister, Pepper. They would have loved you. Hope you are having fun running around and playing with other dogs. Until we meet again. Love you Ozzy.

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April 22, 19 - I came by to visit you today and could not help but cry and think of how you should be here with us still. You were only 5 when you died and you would have been 12 this year. Bonnie, Whiskey, and Jack all miss you I'm sure. I know Brandon and I do; we still talk about you and how unfair it is that you are not here.

Please also visit Bonnie.