by Laura Ankerson
I just wanted to share an experience I had last night (Nov 5th, 2003) in a dream... but let me just tell you something about the kitty cat that I am talking about. Raji hasn't come home in over a month. I have had him since he was a baby only 8 weeks old and this past April he turned 15 years old. He was a one of a kind cat... a one owner cat... and a cat that didn't take crap from anyone or any animal, even though I could play as rough with him as I wanted and he always knew when to hold back and behave or when the play time was over.
When he was a kitten he used to crawl inside my leather Harley Davidson hat and sleep for hours. If my friend Mark would come over to visit Raji would crawl inside the sleeve of his leather jacket and go to sleep. He knew better than to be up on the countertops or table... and he was a very intelligent kitty and could exact revenge if he felt it necessary. I remember he used to wait for my roommate to get totally involved in watching television and then Raji would run out from his hiding spot... bite Mike on the back of the arm or the ankle and then run into my bedroom because he knew that Mike wouldn't go in there. My nephews learned the greatest respect for him because I had warned them from little on, that Raji would bite if they messed with him. It was so funny and cute whenever the boys wanted to go into another room or up the stairs and Raji was within 5 feet of wherever they wanted to walk they would call for me to come and get Raji so they could walk safely by without getting attacked. Even when the boys turned 10 and 11 years old they would still remember that Raji was a force to be reckoned with and would call for me to get Raji so they could walk down the hallway or even to sit on the sofa.
He had always been an indoor kitty and once when he was younger he managed to get outside through a window, but he couldn't get back inside. He was terrified when I came home after work and it was dark and he cried and cried until I finally heard him and brought him back in the house. From that time on he wouldn't go any further than the front steps. He also loved to go for car rides... especially at night so he could see the street lights and stoplights... he was such a cool cat.
He used to torment every guy I ever dated and all of them were afraid of him. When we moved to South Carolina to be with Rafael I explained to Rafael that the first time Raji attacked, bit, or hissed to show his dominance he must make sure he retaliated or Raji would be relentless in his torture. Rafael didn't believe me until finally about two weeks after moving I was at work and when I came home Rafael said he had had to give Raji a little smack with a newspaper insert because Raji wouldn't let Rafael walk through the doorway. Every time he tried to step over him Raji would scratch and bite his ankle, so he had to do it. It was so funny because I had warned Rafael, but he still apologized repeatedly for doing it. I told him that in the next few days Raji would attempt to do that again just to see if this was a fluke and that Rafael would have to assert himself again or Raji would know he could get away with it. And sure enough, about a week later Rafael had to do it again while I was at work.... after he used the newspaper that second time Rafael never had to do it again and Raji had learned to respect him and later come to love him.
When we finally moved out to the place at the dead end road in the country, Raji discovered that he could go outside and roam around and still always come home and be fed. He knew he could come into the house and if he wanted he could snuggle up with me and purr on my pillow until I fell asleep. He was a one of a kind and wonderful kitty cat.... I loved him very much and he loved me too. Like I said, he hasn't come home in over a month and I knew that due to his age, his poor hearing, and poor eyesight that this day would come inevitably. I knew in my heart that he went off to the woods to die. I also knew in my heart that the reason he didn't come home to die was that he knew it would be much harder on me to see him there. It had gotten to the point that he didn't want to come into the house anymore... I knew he was distancing himself from me so it wouldn't hurt so much when he left forever.
Last night I had a dream that I opened the front door and there he was sitting there waiting for me on the porch. He looked so young and vibrant, his eyes were clear, his fur coat was shiny and soft like when he was young... and I rushed over to pick him up and gave him so much love and hugs and kisses. I carried him over to tell Rafael that he didn't have to worry anymore about Raji because Raji was just fine now. I told him that he had come home to let us know that he is fine. He is happy and can run and jump just like when he was little. He can see better than ever and he wanted to make sure that he came home to tell me how much he loved me.
I know that it was a dream, but I also know that in my heart it was really him coming home to tell me that he was alright and he knew he was always loved. I know I will not see him in this life again and I am alright with that because I know he has a "beyond" and that I will see him again and he will always be my kitty. He lives in my heart and my memories and I will always treasure the memories he gave me. Thank you for letting me share my experience and my memories of Raji.