I already had 4 cats and a dog when my neighbor said "come with me to this barn they have kittens to give away". I said ok but I'm not getting one. There he was, this little gray cat in a pen with 10 other cats. I didn't have a gray cat so I took him home. My husband was going to flip. The minute he walked into the house, he owned it. He acted as though this was where he belonged. He immediately went to Toey our 9 year old dog and laid beside her. They became instant friends. Nomar slept on our bed at night and everyone who met him, loved him. He was sweet and very special. He went out and hunted in the warm weather. I always worried about him and kept close tabs on him through the day. During the winter, he stayed in, it was too cold. The other day he went out. I don't know why. I kept calling him through the day thinking he was sleeping in the garage or hiding someplace. I began to worry and at 4:00 pm looked out the back porch to see him laying in the snow. I knew he was gone but I don't know what happened. I feel deep sorrow and I am devastated that this little cat who showed so much love and sweetness had to pass over alone. He was probably frightened and cold. I know he knew how much he was loved but I wish I could have been there for him. If only....I keep saying to myself. I want him back but I know I can't. I have his pictures and his memories but when will the pain stop. We love you little guy and will miss terribly. I miss you at the bottom of bed in the morning. I wake from my sleep and immediately feel the pain.