by Gina Michaelson
Dear Buddha,
This is so hard for me, not having you here. I don't feel safe at night, I don't feel as loved when I come home. You stood by our family through some of the roughest times imaginable, but you always made us feel safe. You were sweet and kind, sometimes when I needed a hug, you would let me put my arms around you and rest my head on your strong shoulder, and I knew that everything would be OK. When I would come home, you would jump up lick at my face, and even though I would yell at you for messing up my makeup or clothes, you would still look at me like I made your day. You were my only friend I could be honest with about my feelings, happy or sad you let me talk. I had just taught you to shake hands.
I hope there's a rainbow bridge, sweet Buddha, and I pray that you and KC and Sean are all together watching over us with Little Bit. I know that you guys will have stories to share, all the love you gave, all the happiness you made us feel. The house is empty. It's been seven years and I still sometimes cry over loosing KC, now your gone too, and I feel like my supporting pillars have been knocked down.
I got your earthly remains today, mama had you cremated. She keeps the box by her bed with a picture of you. She loved you so much, you always made her happy no matter what went on in the rest of our lives. John and Pauline broke her heart a hundred times, but you knew how to fix it. I truly wish I did too. I feel helpless without you here, You always knew how to make me feel special.
Please tell KC hi for me, tell her she is my baby. She was there when my earth shattered, without her I couldn't haven't put the pieces back together, I might have just thrown them away, she saved my life. You and KC are two of the largest blessing God ever sent me, and I'm sorry that he had to take you both away so soon, but every day in some way I thank the sweet heavens that I had time with you at all. I look for your face in every dog I see, but I don't see the same reflection. I try to feel your fur in every dog I touch, but they're never the same. I try to hear your bark in my dreams, but I've lost KC's, and yours is fading too, Buddha.
I'll love you forever and I hope that there is a heaven where we can be together, where KC can play catch with me and I can rub her tummy, and where you and I can talk.
I love you still, I'll never stop.
With all the Love in the world,
your sister Buddha, and your mommy KC,
Gina