It has been two weeks since the loss of my Amanda "J". I find comfort in knowing that she is never far away. She is still alive in my heart. And when I need her the most and am missing her so much the pain is almost unbearable; in my dreams she appears. The following is dedicated to her. How can I let you go. How can I walk away. You are the light of my life. The love of my heart. But I can not be selfish. You never said a word. You didn't have to. Your actions were all that I needed. See, actions speak louder than words. Your actions told me that you were no longer you. You were existing for me. No longer living. It broke my heart, To see you fall. To no longer hear your voice. No longer a smile, or the wave of your tail. Only the love in your eyes remained. Clouded over with your pain. Your final steps still remain, A faint out line in the snow. It breaks my heart to see them every day. I wish it would snow forever and a day. So that it would erase my pain. I find comfort in the fact, That I was with you, Till you sighed your final breath. I can still feel you fur against my face. The smell of your breath. I asked God on my first night alone, With out you, To let me see you, to know that you were okay. And in my dreams you came to me, As clear as day. You were as beautiful as I remembered you. Your eyes were bright and so full of light. Then and there I knew, That I had done the right thing. It's been a couple of weeks since I kissed you good- bye. But I can't get you out of my mind. I asked God again, just one more time. To let me see you. In my dreams again you appeared. It was so real. You were running around my legs. Smiling and happy. But your looks had changed. You were still as beautiful, But with a silver lining. I looked to my friends and family. Can't you see her. Look at how beautiful she is. But you were only there for me, As you have always been. I find comfort in knowing, That you are my forever friend. In my heart you live. Till I see you in my dreams again, We shall meet at Rainbows Bridge in the end. I love you. Love Mom.