Welcome to Brahms's Rainbow Bridge Memorial Residency
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Memories of Brahms
Brahms Lullaby - a true angel with fur on. You were rarely without a purr. You loved everyone -cats, people,and unless something scared you, you purred, you loved like I've never seen You were Scotty Underpants beloved brother and Lucy Bear's little baby and Gus's loving friend and Laurie's little darling. On July 1st, 2006 you disappeared in the night and I never saw you again, it was the worst day of my life. You are only 3 years old. I think of you in heaven with Jesus and it is my only comfort. You were born in my house and the day you were born I knew I wanted to keep you and one of your brothers - Scotty Underpants who is thankfully still with us and who we love dearly and is so funny. But do we miss you Brahmsies. Scotty used to cuddle up with you at night and play with you in the day time. He gets extra love and prayers now and it took Lucy a long time to smile again after you left us. Gus knows how much I miss you and he is my great comfort - at 16 years old and diabetic, he is a special blessing also I thank God for every day with him. 18 pounds not fat, just a giant orange teddy bear with a white face and white paws and turtleneck and tummy. Oh Brahmies I loved you so much and still do but miss you nearly more than I can take sometimes. I think of you in heaven knowing Jesus has you in His loving hands.
November 26, 2006
Brahmies I remember you coming into the garden with me anytime I was outside with you. It was so hard to go into the garden this summer after you left us. But Scotty knows. The other night I was out cutting some plants down that I should have done earlier and while I was on my hands and knees, he climbed on my back and stayed there 10 minutes. He was remembering you and comforting me. He's your brother even though he's so different. Why did you leave us Brahmies? God knows I guess - along with the sadness there's a lot of good things this grief can bring.

I love you sweetheart.
Six months ago, missing you this morning Brahmies. Scotty Gus and Lucy and Laurie all tell you hello and we love you.
March 20, 2007 - it is the first day of Spring, you love Spring Brahmies and even though it's only 20 degrees I know you'd be out there with Scotty playing with him and Lucy and loving Gussie cat. By the way Mr. Gus needs your angel prayers for him. He loved you so much you were so sweet to him. You treated him just like a favorite dad and were so considerate knowing he wasn't a young kitty cat like you. What manners and honor you treated the others with. My angel boy I love you.

April 11, 2007 - In 3 days Brahmie it will be your birthday along with the little Scotty Underpants. You and your brother will be 4 years old. Such a happy time the past 3 years and it will be sad this year without you baby. More memories of you with Gus as this really touched my heart. After you became an established kitten and were ready to explore the house-you and Scotty stayed here and your other brother and sisters found new homes boo hoo, my beautiful boy the first thing you did was to find Gus and greet him. I said to you and Scott - that's Gus and you went right up to him and did the cat equivalent of a hug and handshake. You rubbed against him and turned him in 3 circles.
He didn't want another kitty at age 13 but Gus couldn't help but love you. Since Lucy was a single mom, you loved Gussie cat like a a beloved daddy and cuddled with him when you were scared or cold or needed a cuddle mate. Gussie grew to love you and brother Scott as you were sweet and respectful and didn't violate his space but just loved him on his terms. Scottie loves Gus too and I believe he learned this from you. You are an angel and no one had to teach you to love My angel boy.

June 23, 2007. I just noticed I said your birthday was coming up Brahmies but I never wrote you Happy Birthday on April 14.
Happy Birthday sweet heart. I take great delight in thinking of you as a 4 year old up in heaven loving those babies - your friends D-Max, Ralphie, Princess, Hot Rod, E.T. Little Man, Winston, Burton, Timmy,Max -a new little orange boy. there are so many special friends you have now and they love to have parties. Please give them kisses and bring paw pops to everyone. We miss you dear boy, next Sunday July 1 it will be a year for us to be without you. Please keep your paws on Gussie cat, I need him here with us so do Lucy and Scott. You're his bestest buddy besides his mama. Brahmies I'd love a happy dream to know what you were doing, how I'd love to hear a purr and get a scratchy kiss and bath. I love you sweet boy Brahmie Rahmie.

Brahms Lullaby you've been gone a year. It's July 2nd and you had a beautiful party with lots of music with your friends - D-Max and White Boots and Timmy and Princess and Little Man and Abbie and Bushey and Mesha and Buddy and Misty and Hot Rod and E.T...
I know you love them all sweet boy. It was a year ago that you left me for a place where I couldn't find you and couldn't follow you and the very realization of this made my entire being turn to a solid block of ice. I believe you're with Jesus now how I wish for a vision of you playing and having fun and being the loving angel you are. I love you sweet boy. Your Mom
December 4, 2007
Brahmie Rahmie, still missing you. Scottie is playing in the snow. I know you'd be right there with him but you'd probably come in a little sooner than him. He's my buddy now like he used to be your buddy but we all miss you, me especially miss seeing you together. But I do think there is something of you, you left for him. I love you Brahmies..
December 23, 2007 - Brahmie Rahmie! How I love calling you that sweetheart, it is my special name for you announcing your sweet presence pretending you were doing something wrong although I could never be angry with you, it was just to be funny.
Brahmie can you talk to God today, I'm having such a rough time baby boy. It's Christmas and I feel like everything is all wrong. Of course I miss you terribly I'm so used to missing you terribly. I would give anything to see you playing with Scottie.
Your little brother gets so much attention now - I wish he had you but he doesn't and he is such a little trooper, so sweet and wonderful. He has your sweet spirit Brahmie Rahmie along with his own. He doesn't wake me up at the crack of dawn anymore
and he is so good whether I stay with him or not. I'm so grateful that he knew you for 3 years he is a better kitty for having known you and the sadness of the loss has given him such a sweetness. I don't think you knew sadness and loss Brahmies. I think you had the perfect Angel life but you were also the first kitty I ever lost and as of now the only one still. Sweet baby please say a prayer for your human momma. She is hurting something terrible tonight. She has lost too many things and everything seems all wrong right now. It is winter and very dreary cloudy cold and nasty. Scottie of course has been right out there in it. A big winter storm. You and him loved the snow you loved the spring the fall and the summer. You loved everything you loved life. I would let you out of your "apartment" that you shared with him and he'd come shooting out of it and you'd amble out and walk over to Gussie Cat and turn him in 3 circles and lay down and let me kiss your tummy. You'd be so happy to eat together and then it was time to go outside. You'd amble to the door happily while Scottie Underpants would launch out the door and go airborn off the porch and out to the edge of the woods before he knew where he going and why. It was so funny so very sweet and amazing to watch. Two brothers from the same litter - Ying and Yang, Sweet and Salty, a sleek sooty black boy and a giant teddy bear a big little orange boy. The best of friends, 4 beautiful eyes looking at me from different branches on the same small tree. Sweet baby you are in heaven now and you know God can you talk to him for me. Your mama hurts and she misses you very much too. I love this song for you - My Little Orange Drummer Boy - it fits so perfectly. I used to have the Garden Song and it fit you too because you loved to visit me in the garden but it still makes your mama too sad, this helps me remember you and your sweet wonderful personality, you were the purpose driven kitty the little angel boy who knew some kind of heavenly happiness and joy, a little too angelic for this world my little darling. I want to see you again, but I want it to be with Scottie and Gussie Cat and Lucy too. Maybe in heaven Lucy will learn to love other kitties like you do, she loved you while you were her babies but after that she was done...another reason you were an angel boy, no one else loved like you. But I'm repeating myself. What was the expression I heard tonight.
Sweet baby you are the very picture of love itself - God's special gift, the face of love, the paws of love the fur of love the breath of love.
January 18, 2008
My Little Orange Drummer Boy. Brahmie Rahmie I love you baby. You march to the beat of your own drummer my little angel boy
Please watch over your friend and mine Gussie Cat. He is so special in his sweet Gussie way as you and I both know and now he is suffering in another way. I love him so much and I know you did too Brahmie Rahmie. I keep thinking he may be joining you sometime soon and if he has to leave me I want more than anything for him to be with you and God. But maybe God can heal him up again and give him some time to feel good..Precious little orange boys I love you both so much. You left me so quickly Brahmies and Gussie has stayed and stayed through thick and thin. Both in God's time and purpose. Beautiful boy you graced us for 3 short years and remain forever in my heart and those of Scott Lucy and Gus. I love you Baby Boy

February 1, 2008 - Brahmies 19 months Hello Baby Boy, I love and miss you and I realized tonight you are so much with us still, there is not a day goes by I don't think of home with you
in it still - you have such a big angel heart
and you've left that here with us. Scottie Underpants has taken over your head bumps for Gus. God had to take you for a reason,
Angels just can't always stay. When I first lost you all that joy you brought turned to anguish but after all this time I can say I'm so glad you were with us even though 3 years was over in what still seems like 3 months, you are never forgotten and I still like to think of you playing with all your wonderful
friends up in heaven. There are so many amazing babies I've met and heard about here and you get to play with them all...
I love you sweet boy still can't write to you without tons of tears. Scottie esp. loves you and carries part of your heart wherever he is.
March 30, 2008
Brahmie Rahmie spring is coming very slowly your kitty mama
Lucy is sitting right here next to me. I just mentioned your name to her and she looked at me in that sweet deep way that both she and your brother Scottie have when I mention your name and they wish to tell me they understand and remember you very well that you are still with them in their hearts. Oh I pray for a sign of you. It has been soooooooo long. I'm reminded of the song "Here Comes The Sun". That song fits you so very well.
It's been a long cold sometimes lonesome winter here and in a way it's been a long cold winter without you dear boy. Spring is coming very slowly this year but it's coming. I never thought of it this way, winter is loss and cold but spring always comes even if it's not until April sometimes. Dear Lord I hope spring comes eventually on the missing of you my dear boy, it's been sooo very very long that you've been gone. In a way you're always here but in another you've been gone so long. Here I am crying for you again my sweet baby boy. I love you Brahmies and Lucy and Scottie and Gussie cat do too. You missed the slumber party today me and the 3 musketeers all taking a 3 hour afternoon nap and no one even woke me up for all that time. I remember the old slumber parties and there wasn't room on the bed for all four of you so one slept on the floor. Scottie has your sweetness baby boy I love you very much.
April 14, 2008
Happy Birthday Brahmie Rahmie. This is what I wrote to you for a tribute.

..on April 13-14, 2003. Your Mama Lucy had gone into labor, wasn't eating the last 24 hours. Lucy had turned into a little pumpkin yet 1 week before she gave birth was still climbing up into the garage rafters and running around. I mentioned this to my sister and she said yep that's exactly what she did when she was pregnant with my nephew so I guess it was normal LOL...anyway the time came and I watched 1,2,3,4,5 little babies born and Lucy the best little mom taking perfect care of all of you. After seeing 4 beautiful variations of black and white and gray babies....there was this big orange kitty that lit up the room....I wasn't planning on keeping any babies, well that lasted until about a minute after they were born, Brahmie Rahmie "You Had Me At Hello" and you later chose Scottie Underpants to stay with you. For 8 weeks I watched your little family eat and eat and eat and eat, play, sleep, eat, play, eat,did I mention eat...I still remember the day all your little 4 week old legs grew long enough to run around without falling over and I had 5 little race cars kitties zooming around the room. Lucy
girl who had come to my house several months earlier and pleaded with me with her eyes to take her in had brought me one of the best gifts of my life. Well you my Brahmie Rahmie only had 3 birthdays with us. You was the angel that just couldn't stay and for the last 2 birthdays Scottie has been 4 and 5 years old by himself....but you are everywhere with us still. When Scottie greets Gussie cat and sleeps with him. When Lucy goes potty in the hole I just dug to plant a bulb
in. When Gussie cuddles with me to give me another little bit of comfort like he did when you left us. Wish Brahmie a Happy Birthday in heaven all you sweet little bridge babies. My little angel that led me here to a place that also changed my life in a big way. It is midnight on
April 14...you disappeared at midnight as well.......Scottie is here and he Lucy and Gussie cat are loved and loved even more since we lost our baby, brother and Gussie's best friend...
I love you baby boy and will miss and remember you forever until we meet again.
May 21, 2008, You had me at Hello baby boy. I heard the name of that song
somewhere and tonight I was just thinking how it fit you. You had me at hello.
I looked and Lucy had just had her last baby and there you were a little
orange ball of sunshine plopped down in the middle of things. I saw
the miracle of life and the love of life through your little
face and heart. Soooo happy to be here, loved your mama and all
your brothers and sisters. It was a perfect kitty world. All the playmates
you could want and meals on paws whenever
and wherever you were hungry. What I wouldn't give to go back
and watch it with you again.
I love you baby boy.

July 1, 2008
Dear Brahmie,
2 years ago tonight June 30 2006 at 11 PM I saw you for the the last time.
Brahmie the Angel, purrfect and beautiful with love and joy you were born with.
I know, I watched as you were born into a family of beautiful black and
gray and white babies and suddenly there you were. Where did you come from.
That's easy, Heaven. You came to teach so many things and the biggest lesson,
the hardest one came when you left like so
many angels do - you were gone. 3 years and
3 months we got to have you. I have to say it still feels like I had you for
3 weeks. Scott, Lucy and Gussie have their battle scars. Gussie fighting
and living with diabetes, Lucy was given away to someone who didn't want her
and had to find a new home herself.
She had to pack her kitty bags and find someone who loved and wanted her.
Scottie lost his beloved brother and playmate--just like that you were gone. In a
cruel world that it is sometimes, you had a purrfect kitty life. You led me to
so many angels. Before that, you were the angel, You and Scott, Lucy and Gussie.
I knew a lot of sorrow already and you all gave me a reason to not give up.
But you Brahmies had to leave to show me there were angels like I've met here.
So many took us under their "wings" and showed me I wasn't alone, showed me who
you were playing with in heaven- loved you and the others pictures and stories
let me share their babies pictures and stories. I have to say the sadness hasn't
lost much of it's edge when it hits. You lived a life of profound beauty and a
very compelling story. My heart had to be broken to live again - I will live
in this sorrow and beauty until I see you again my beautiful boy.

Brahmies, it is July 1st 2011, I can scarcely believe it. 5 years!! I thought
I'd run out of space but perhaps I can still write to you. I haven't written since
2008. Shortly after that October 2008, Gussie Cat came to join you in heaven
after a very long brave battle after which he is now healthy and whole and I pray
to God playing with his buddy Brahmie Rahmie. And then a year ago, your Mama
Lucy Cat joined you both, very suddenly :*( We have a new baby - Louie Reese
who looks like your tuxedo brother Patches who we gave away at 8 weeks, who I
missed ever since. Scottie and Louie Reese are the best of friends. Scottie
gave Louie hell for awhile = part of his Scottie nature. He missed his Mama
and his brothers and Louie was a newcomer. But now he is so glad to have a
little brother again to play with. Finally!!! Brahmie Rahmie, still thinking
of you, still missing you.. You brought so many gifts in your short life and
brought me some of the best friends of my life. Although I've never met them,
they shared you and your stories and your beautiful life and family. xoxoxoxo

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