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Cody , which is short for Lakota Sioux, you are the sweetest fur ball of love in the world. I often joked with you that you had the demeanor and personality more of a puppy than of a typical cat much like your wonderful sister Sparky. You wanted nothing more then to spend every minute of every day in my arms or in my skin. You loved to cuddle up with me at night in bed and would slowly move closer and closer until you were laying across my chest or my neck, hoping that if you moved very very slow I wouldn't notice you there. You were never able to sleep unless your paw was touching my skin. Whether it was reaching your paw across my chest and touching my skin to sleep or whether it was just to reach out and touch my hand with your paw. I know it made you feel safe and comforted though, or maybe you also knew just how comforting it made me feel. Your were perfectly happy spending my days off with me laying on my lap watching TV and never getting up for anything all day long. When I was sad you would lay in bed with me and lay on your side like me with your head on my pillow facing me. You would say a couple of meows while looking in my eyes then go to sleep. You wanted to make sure I knew your were there for me. I have had many cats but have never had another cat anything like you my sweet baby boy, Cody. Never met such a loyal devoted cat who truly loved me more than himself. You is so unbelievably missed. I want you to try not to be scared. As I discussed with you when you first passed away you will be seeing a large Grey and White Tabby up at Rainbow Bridge named Murray and also a rather large shelty named Shelton. They are both very kind and very loving and so very wonderful. They are going to take such good care of you and keep you safe and protected. Don't be afraid and please don't run away from them. They are waiting for you. Shelton was another member of our family who would have been your uncle. He took his journey to the Rainbow bridge in 1997. Murray would be your older brother. He is so much like you. So loving, so wonderful and so loyal. He took his journey to the Rainbow Bridge in 2001. When you see them, could you please tell them I love them and I miss them too. I promise, they will take very good care of you until I can get there to meet you. I will take care of your sister here at home for you. 4-9-15 My sweetheart, I have missed you so much that I have cried almost non-stop since you left me the other night. I still feel like there should have been something, as your Momma, I could have done to prevent this and fix it before it came to this. I can't believe you are gone and I am so lost right now. I am afraid to go to bed because I know you aren't there waiting for me. You don't come wandering out of the bedroom to tell me it's bed time. You aren't there to cuddle against my face and reach your paw across my chest so you can feel my skin before you go to sleep. I hate waking up because you aren't there laying next to me asking me to sleep in for a few more minutes with you. Life isn't the same anymore. I miss you. I love you. 4-11-15 It's now 4 days... It doesn't feel like it is going to get any easier to not have you here with me. Your sister, Sparky, has just started to come back into the bedroom to sleep with me for a few minutes at a time. I know she misses you and is lost without you here. She doesn't know what to do with herself. She doesn't seem to know where to lay on the bed without you already there in your spot. So she leaves and sleeps in the living room. I was happy to see She was laying with me when I woke up this morning. Hopefully she will become comfortable again to sleep with me all night like she did when she was cuddled next to you. I know her heart is breaking just as much as mine is. I so wish you could come back to us. This pain is so unbearable. 4-13-15 today was the first Monday since you left us. It was especially hard for your sister. I think she was afraid I was gone for good because when I came home from work she was screaming at me and following me everywhere. When I sat down with her she couldn't get enough love from me and seemed to be trying to crawl under my skin and into my clothes. She even started biting me. I guess she was pretty freaked out having me gone all day after being home with her all weekend. She did sleep the entire night with me in bed last night. That's the first time since you left us. I broke down several times at work today crying, I miss you so badly I can't breathe. All I can think about is how much I wish I had gone with you. I felt you in my dream last night. I wish I could hold you and cuddle with you again. I wear your ashes in a pendant around my neck every day so I can keep you close to my heart. God, I miss you. I hope you have found Murray and Shelton and you guys are playing together and having fun. Mommy loves you so so much. I miss you so bad. 3-14-16 It's been almost a year since you left me and I still miss you soooo much. I still cry all the time. Less often than before but still pretty regularly. As you can see I am sure, Sparky and I welcomed an addition to the family shortly after you left. HEr name is Reagan and she is such a sweet tempered dog. You would have loved her. I think you two soul dhve gotten a long so great. Both of you so mild tempered and loving. Sparky does not like her much, but I am sure that is no surprise to you. Reagan was sucha large intricate part of our heaing though. If not for her I don't think Sparky and I would have survivied your loss. It was just so painful. I'm sure you have sseen how Reagan has some issues that have been discovered since We rescued and adopted her. She is deaf so she takes a little extra TLC and patience, but I don't mind that one bit. I actually love it. Her deafness also helps tremendously with Sparky yelling at her lal the time beucase she doesn't hear her or know about it. Also though, her health isn't all that great. Her times with us is limited too and I don't know how much longer we have with her but I know eachday is a gift and a blassing. She has her good days and her bad days of course and I try to spoil her and make sure she is loved and cared for better than she has ever known. I hope for her to last the year at the very least. I don't know if that will happen but anything is possible. I want you to watch for her though and be ready to welcome her incase she passes to join you sooner than I would like and just in case I am not home for her when she goes. I knwo you will be there for her just as you were always there for me. She is such a sweet girl and she is going to love you so much. Well you 1 year date is coming up very very soon and it breaks my heart to think about it. I love you so much Cody and I will never ever forget you or how much I know you loved me in return. You are always my sweet baby boy. Mommy loves you. Kisses. 3-17-16 I've been thinking about you so much lately. I think becuase your 1 year anneversery of being gone is creeping up closer an quickly. I miss you so much baby. I wanted to stop by and add some St Patrick's Day platns to your memorial and make it look festive for today. I love you and I miss andI wish I could hug and kiss you so much. |
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