3/3/08 My Precious Girl, It has been a long three weeks since I've gotten to come talk to you here. I have missed coming here and seeing your beautiful face, but most especially just talking to you. As you know, I was out with foot surgery, but I also know you've been with me every minute. I am back at work today, and of course came by here to see you first. I love you so much Countessa, and will always love you to bits - always. Your buddy Cody is well too, he had eye surgery also, but is alright and up to his old tricks again - and for that I am so glad :0) Cody, Princess, Starr and Chickpea send you their love and kisses, and of course mine comes to you without question. :0) All my love and xoxoxoxo's, Mommy. 3/5/08 My Beautiful Girl, I just want to stop by and tell you how much I love and miss you. You are my pride and joy, and never a day goes by that I don't think of you and I know our love will always be there. Take care of yourself and know that you are never far from Mommy. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy 3/6/08 My Countessa, As I opened your site and saw your beautiful face, I got the biggest smile on my face. :0) You are my beautiful, beautiful girl Countessa, and I love you so much. All my love always. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 3/13/08 My Loving Girl, Last night I was talking to Heather about you, and we were thinking of all your cute and sometimes naughty ways that you had. How we laughed when I reminded her that even your doctor said you had beautiful "legs." :0) You are my precious girl Countessa, and I love and miss you to this day. You are my girl, always. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 3/21/09 My Precious Countessa, I want to wish you a very happy Easter with lots of love and xoxoxo's :0) It goes without saying my darling girl that I will miss you, and think of you on that special day. I know you are where you are supposed to be for now - it's hard to accept, but I know I need to. I will instead focus on all those other Easter's that we both got to share together. Have fun with all your buddies at RB, and know that your Mommy loves you with all of her being. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 3/24/08 My Precious Baby, I cannot get you off my mind now for the past few days, but especially so today, and I know tomorrow will be horrendous. I keep thinking of you, and wishing I could have done something more for you - I would have, if only I had known how very sick you really were. I took you to the vet on the 23rd and they gave you medicine and said that you should be alright or at least we didn't expect it to get so bad so fast. I took off work the 24th and stayed with you, and kept waiting for you to get better. You were so calm the whole day, and just wanted to lie down quietly. I took you out into the back yard and you stayed there all day. You would move occasionally to new spots and I took that as a good sign. I had to work that night, and so left you with the hope that when I got back you would be better, but to my utter dismay, found you even more sick. I got home from work at 7:30 a.m. and we rushed you to the hospital around 8:00 a.m. They asked that I leave you there as the doctor was not in, but that he would be in by 10:00 a.m. and they promised me that you would be well taken care of. I left thinking that you were in the best place and that I only had to ride out time till I got good news about you. But Countessa, my world crashed when I got a call from the vet at 9:10 p.m. telling me that you did not make it. March 25, 9:10 a.m. is etched in my heart forever. If only I knew how sick you were my darling girl. There are so many things I keep telling myself I could have and should have done. Nothing I can do now will bring you back, but I can still tell you, that you were such a source of joy in my life. I have never been loved like you loved me and I have never loved a puppy as much as I loved you. All my love and xoxoxo's, to my most precious girl. Love, Mommy. 3/28/08 My Beautiful Countessa, I love you too much and miss you more than words can say. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 3/31/08 My Darling Girl, Thinking of you a lot today. All is well at home - Cody is doing well after his surgery - his eye is as good as new. Starr is getting the same eye growth that Cody had, but it's small right now and so I'm going to wait till I absolutely have no choice but to get surgery done on her too. Starr is such an adorable little girl - loves your mommy to bits and is so much like you. Thank you for leaving her for me - it is the closest I'll come to having you around. Princess and Chickpea are also cute as ever - they still sleep on my bed and take up most of the space. The space is tight but the love they have to give is boundless. It's a given that I still love you with all of me and that will never change. All my love to my beautiful girl. Love and xoxoxo, Mommy. 4/9/08 My Beloved Countessa, Sorry for being away from here for so long. My life got busy, but not busy enough that I did not think of you - just busy enough to keep me away from here for a little while. I think of you evryday and still miss you with all my heart. If I could, I'd come and bring you back home with me in a heart beat. You are my special girl Countessa, you are Mommy's love always. Love and xoxox's, Mommy. 4/15/08 My Countessa, Just stopping by to tell you how much I still love and miss you. You are still my beautiful girl and I think about you everyday. All my love to you, my precious girl. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 4/23/08 My Beautiful Baby Girl, Each time I come here and see your beautiful face, only brings the biggest smile to my face. I still think of you, and miss you everyday and all the time. It is with a heavy heart that I look at the park that you liked to play in. I still have not been able to stir up the courage to go there. That is your park, and the last time you went there is when I was there too. Cody; Princess; star; and Chickpea all send you their love and kisses, and mine goes to you without saying. :0) I love you my Sweet Girl, and will - forever. All my love and xoxoxo's, to you. Love, Mommy. 4/24/08 I love you and miss you so much Countessa. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 5/5/08 My Darling Countessa, I love you, I love you, I love you soooooo much. :0) Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 5/16/08 My Precious Baby, Please know that I think of you everyday. Just because I have not been visiting your site as often as I would like to, doesn't mean you are far from my mind. Your name comes up everyday and never a day goes by that you are not missed. There will never be another you - Countessa. Your babies, Princess, Starr and Chickpea are doing well. Starr has an eye infection, and I am taking care of it as best I can - it is getting better, but taking a bit too long. She is such a precious little girl, so much like her Momma. :0) Little Chickpea is still so "in love" with food. I often have to check her and take her food bowl away to keep her from eating more than she needs. :0) But she is priceless, and all she wants is attention - of any kind - but you knew that, and you that is why you used to constantly keep your eye on her. I remember how much you loved and spoiled her. I will be back again soon to talk to you and to let you know that I love you - as usual, and that you are constantly with me. Love you with all my heart, Countessa. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 5/22/08 My Beautiful Countessa, I love you so much, and miss you like I did the first day you left me. Know that you will always be my girl, and I will love and treasure the love you gave me - always. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 5/23/08 My Countressa, This is going to be a long weekend that I'll be away from work. Just want to make sure you know that I will take you in my heart wherever I go. I love you and miss you so, so much. I love you Angel Girl. All my love to you always. Love and xoxoxoxo's, Mommy. 5/29/08 Hi Sweet Girl, Just want you to know that I think of you so much, and love you and miss you every day. I am organizing my photo albums (finally), and I am coming accross so many beautiful pictures of you. Will get them put up at your site - one of these days. It is such a beautiful day today, and how I wish I could just go for a long walk with you. How you loved to go for walks - I just had to say "lets go out" and you'd get all excited :0) Still have not gotten up the nerve to go to "your park" yet, and I doubt I will, for a long, long time - if ever. You are my Beautiful Girl, Countessa, and I will love you forever and always. All my love and xoxoxo's, Love, Mommy. 6/3/08 Hi Pretty Girl! You have been on my mind so much today. Wish I can just come to RB and bring you back home. You are still my Precious Girl, and I love and miss you everyday. You are Mommy's love and Mommy's life, and always will be. Know that I love you always. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy.
6/6/08 My Loving Countessa, I know that you know, your Mommy loves and simply adores you. I miss you today like I missed you the first day you left me. If I allow myself to, I can still go to that terrible hurting and lonely place where I was - on the day you went to RB. For now, I will stay as content as I can be to come here and visit you - but all I really want is to look into your beautiful eyes and bury my face into your soft georgous fur and stay there forever holding you. I love you Countessa, sooooo much. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 6/17/08 Hello My Precious Girl, How is Mommy's girl today? As always, you are daily in my thoughts and always near me in spirit. Even though I say it here so often, it goes without saying Countessa, that I love you and miss you with all of me. I know you were there the other day when we celebrated Cody's 12th birthday. I felt you near and I felt you looking at me with the biggest smile when you saw me eat an extra bite of his cup cake for you. Cody and Starr looked absolutely adorable in their little party hats sitting and looking down at his birthday cup cake with one lit candle on it. Cody is as cute and lovable as ever, but you also know how mommy's fears about him getting old. I just treasure every moment I have with him and the other girls, and know that each moment spent with them is absolutely a very special gift. A gift I want to hold onto for as long as I can. Know that I love you to distraction Countessa girl, and I always will. My sweet baby, I love you sooooo much. All my love and xoxoxo's to you only. Love , Mommy. 6/27/08 Hello My Sweet Baby, I think of you everyday, and today is no exception, except that I want to make sure that I made a point of visiting you here just to tell you that you are and always will be My Precious Girl. All your little girls and Cody are doing fine - they miss you, that's for sure, but they are as well as they can be, without you. They are such a joy to me. I was just thinking of what a precious gift you left me, when you left me your little girls. Starr and Cody follow me around all over the house. Princess and Chickpea would do the same too, I'm sure, but they, as you know, can't be with Starr - for the fighting. But thank you my precious Countessa, for giving them to me - they have helped keep your Mommy smiling in your absence. I love and adore you as always little girl, and I hope that when the time is right, you and I will meet and be together - for always. Know that you are my girl. All my love and xoxox's, Love, Mommy. 7/2/08 My Countessa, Came by to tell you that I was thinking of you and to also tell you again how much I love you and my heart still breaks when I think of how long you've been away from me. You are still Mommy's girl and always will be. I love all my other little puppies but there can never be another YOU. I love you soooooo much and with all my heart. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 7/8/08 Hey Little Girl, Your Momma's here again just to tell you how precious you are to me and to let you know that you are still my girl. Never a day goes by that I don't think of you Countessa. I always think of what a beautiful and loving girl you were. You sure loved your momma to bits. I thought I'd change the music at your site, but nothing sounded right for you. I guess it will always be "the dance" for us. Your little girl Starr had to go visit Dr. Manzoor. I actually was brave enough to to with Starr. The last time I visited Dr. Manzoor was when I left you with him on that fatal morning - two years and four months ago. Dr. Manzoor remembered what a good, beautiful girl you were. Anyways, Starr went there a week ago to have an eye infection checked, and also seemed to have some ear problems too. She is much better now and I'm seeing that she is getting her meds regularly and on time. Starr is such a little Love Bunny. She too, adores your mommy. Just know that you are always with me Countessa and I love you now as much as I ever did. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 7/18/08 Hello My Darling Girl, You are still my love, and know that I love you with all my heart and miss you with all of me. All my love to you - always. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 7/30/08 My Precious Countessa, It's your Mommy here, again. :0) I just want to tell you that I still love and simply adore you as much as always. Never a day goes by that I don't think of you. As I got to my desk this morning the first thing I saw was your beautiful face looking up at me and that just made my day. :0) All is well with us here - Cody is as cute as ever, he is slowing down a bit, and I am watching him like a hawk. I am getting as many kisses and all the love I can from him, Starr and Princess because I know they are old now (in doggie years) and time is precious, and like with you, I don't want it to end. But Countessa, you are still my most precious puppy and always will be. Just want you to know that. Baby girl, know that you are loved to bits by me - everyday. All my love and xoxoxo's to my precious girl, Mommy. 8/5/08 My Beautiful Countessa, Came by to tell you that I love you sooooo much. Still think of you EVERYDAY. Miss you like nothing else. How I wish I can just come and pick you up and bring you back home. You are still all over the house - I see your pictures and toys every where and your presence is still a big part of home. Your three girls and Cody send you their love and kisses, and of course - Mommy sends you her heart. I love you my darling Countessa. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 8/13/08 My Precious Girl, Mommy is here checking in to see how her pretty girl is doing. As you know, it goes without saying, that I love and miss you so much. But it does me good to say it every time I come here. You are still a huge missed presence at home, and you are thought about and spoken about everyday. Your three girls and Cody send you their love and kisses as always - and you know you have my love and heart forever. Have fun playing with all the other fur-babies at RB and send Mommy kisses each beautiful butterfly I see. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 8/26/08 My Precious Countessa, Mommy is back to check on her little girl and make sure that you know that I love you so much. You are always in my heart Countessa, and never a day goes by that I don't think of you and miss you. Dan and I took Cody for a nice long walk on Sunday. I needed to go get the Sunday papers, so we decided to take Cody along. He was very excited, and did very well on the walk. We got him a cup of ice water at a 7-Eleven and he drank some but mostly he was too excited and wanted to keep going. I thought of you and how I took you out that way too. How you loved to go out, I'd just have to say "lets go" and you would start looking at our faces and start shaking with excitement. All of us still think of you and love you, but of course, you know you still own your Mommy's heart completely. All my love to you, my precious little girl. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 8/29/08 I love you Baby Girl, with all my heart. :0) All my love and xoxoxoxo's to only you. Love, Mommy 9/5/08 Hello My Girl, I was just thinking of you and thought it would be a good idea to come sit with you for a while and visit. I still think of you DAILY and LOVE YOU SO MUCH. You were always such a special little girl and you still are. I doubt that this ache in my heart from missing you, will ever go. I can still see you lying at the foot of my bed so contentedly. How you loved being on my bed and how I loved you being there. Cody now sleeps there - but for me, it will always be your spot. I love you with all of me. Love and xoxox's, Mommy 9/18/08 Hello My Precious Girl, Mommy has been so negligent and has allowed herself to get distracted from coming here for her much loved visits. I hope you know that you are still MY GIRL. I love you so much Countessa and nothing there has changed. :0) Your babies and Cody are doing well - they are all helping to keep your mother in a somewhat sane frame. I don't know what I'd do without them. Only the other day I was saying how cute Starr is, and that you left me the best gift when you left me your babies. I hope you are having fun with all the other furbabies at RB. Tell them with the biggest smile on your face that your Mommy wrote to say "hi" to all of them but that her heart still belongs only to you. All my love to you, my beautiful Puppy. Love and xoxoxox's. Mommy. 10/1/08 My Sweet Countessa, I am sooooo sorry for not coming here to visit sooner. I have a lot of reasons that I can share with you for not doing so, but that is not important. What is important, is that you know that you are still MY LOVE. You are still my beautiful girl, and I love you with all my heart. I hope you have been having fun? I know you have been with me - because I have always felt you close. Your Cody and your other girls are doing well. Starr still has her eye infection - but I am trying to do what the Dr. said I should - so I'm hoping it will be a thing of the past soon. Yesterday we had some bad thunder and lightening and your girls were terrified. Cody sat through it - like nothing was going on :0) his hearing (as you know) is not what it used to be. I love you baby girl, and always know that even though I am not here as often as I would like to be or as much as I should, you are still always with me. All my love and kisses and I'm going to be here more often, that's a promise! Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 10/14/08 My Beautiful Countessa, Just came by to tell you that I love you so much. Never a day goes by that I don't think of you. You are still my precious Countessa and I wish you never had to go away. Though I cannot see you, I know you are still around me because I feel your presence with me always. Your girls and Cody send you their love. Cody is now taking baby asprin for his stiff joints. He is such a cutie and like I did with you, I watch him like a hawk. Send him a big butterfly kiss while he is sitting out in the backyard. He will love that. I love you Countessa. Always know that, and know that my love for you will be CONSTANT. Love and xoxoxox's, Mommy. 10/21/08 Hi Baby, Came to tell you what I always say, that I love you. I miss you so much - not a day goes that I don't want you back. You are still my precious girl, and Mommy's love. All my love, always. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 12/2/08 My Precious Girl, I am so sorry for taking so long to come visit you here. It wasn't that I forgot you, it was that I have been having trouble with my computer. But it makes me so happy today to be able to come see your beautiful little face and talk to you again, and tend to your site. I still miss you so much Countessa. Last night, I was thinking of you and started to cry just thinking of how much I love and miss you, and wished that I could just come and bring you back home. You are always in my heart little girl, and you will always be my precious, precious love. It is so close to Christmas, and we have already put up our Christmas tree at home. I thought of you, and of the many that we celebrated together. This will be no different except that you will be in my heart, and when I'm stitting and admiring the beautiful tree, you will be right there with me. Say hello to all your little pals there at RB for me. I will say bye for now little one, but remember, you have all my love as you always did. All my love and xoxoxoxo's, Mommy. 12/25/08 My Precious Countessa, Merry Christmas my darling girl. I have been thinking of you so much and even though it has been so busy at work and home, you have be on my mind through it all. This is the third Christmas without you. There is so much that reminds me of you - your Christmas stocking, the old ornaments on the tree that were put up year after year while you where with me. Just want you to know that I love you so much and miss you like nothing else. Happy Christmas precious one and know that your mommy loves you so much and that you are dearly missed. Have a lovely time with your pals at Rainbow Bridge and know that you all gave us the precious gift of love. All my love to you - this Christmas. Love and xoxoxox's, Mommy. 1/20/09 My Beautiful Countessa, Happy New Year my girl, even though it's a bit late - but you know that you were the first one that I whispered a "Happy New Year" to. I still love and miss you like always, nothing has changed that at all. I do find it hard to come visit you as often as I used to because of my computer. But you are always on my mind and still Mommie's Precious Girl. Cody, Princess, Starr and Chickpea all love you and send you a big kiss each, and so does Dan, Trevor and Heather. Take care of your self Pretty Girl and always know that you still have Mommy's heart in your little paw. All my love to you with tons of kisses, love and xoxoxoxo's, Mommy. 2/4/09 My Beautiful Girl, I needed to come visit you today as I am thinking of you and missing you more than ever. I am home recovering from foot surgery and have all the other puppies around me but you are the one I am missing the most. Wish you were here to keep me company. I hope you know that you are still and always will be my precious love. Cody, Princess, Starr and Chickpea send you their love and a big kiss each, and I send you all my love and kisses. Please know that you are not forgotten and that you never will be. You still my precious Countessa. I love you as much today as I ever did. Come visit Mommy and know you have all my love with you always. Love and xoxoxoxo's, Mommy. 2/11/09 Hi Pretty Girl, Just want you to know that I love you soooo much. I miss you and think of you everyday. You are my precious girl who lives in my heart. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 3/23/09 My Precious Countessa, As this time draws near, I can't stop thinking of you. You know, I think of you daily, just more so at this time. I still think of things I should have or maybe could have done to keep you here with me. I am told that when our time here is done, there is nothing to stop the end. But my mind won't let up, and I am still here, after three long years - in this vicious circle wondering if there was something I could have, or should have done for you that I didn't. Countessa, I still miss you so much and love you more than I can say. Words seem so inadequate. You are Mommy's heart. You are still a huge presence here at home. Everyone still talks about you and there is always a huge smile and sparkle in our eyes when your name comes up. I still have every one of your toys - safely stored away, all in the same condition as you left them. You always slept with me on my bed and to this day, the beautiful box with your ashes are safely tucked under my pillow - and has been there since the day I brought you home in it. So, what more can I do to keep you with me Countessa? This is the best I know to do right now. I tell you this only because I want you to know how much you have always meant to me and how much you still do. You are my precious, precious girl. All my love and xoxoxoxo's, Mommy. Cody, Princess, Starr and Chickpea send you their love and xxxx's. 4/7/09 My Beautiful Baby Girl, What a joy it was to see your beautiful face as soon as I opened your site. I got the biggest grin on my face - it was a grin tinged with joy and sadness. Sadness, because I cannot grab hold of you and hug you to bits. I love you so much Countessa, and will miss you again as usual, this Easter. But you are always in my heart - that is a constant. Have fun with all your RB buddies and share your Easter bunny and the goodies from your Easter tree. Remember you are sill MY GIRL. All my love to you - precious one. Love and xoxoxox's, Mommy. 4/22/09 My Precious Countessa, I had to come visit and talk to you for a little while before going to bed. I thought about you alot today, and missed you so much. You are still my wonderful baby girl and I love you more than I can say. Cody, Princess, Starr and Chickpea all send you kisses. You are still a big presence in the house, and you always will be. Have fun with all your wonderful buddies at RB and wait for Mommy. I love you with all my heart. All my love and xoxoxo's, Love, Mommy. 4/26/09 Hi Baby Girl, Mommy was just thinking of you and thought I'd come by and check out your beautiful little face. You have a way of always making me feel better after a visit here. All are doing well at home, except for little Princess. She seems to have hurt her back leg. I think she rushed down the stairs too quickly to go out and play, that she ended up hurting herself. I am keeping a watch on her and she seems to be doing better, but is a bit fussy and wants me close. Cody is stitting here with me while I write to you. He sends you a big Cody kiss. I am felling low and very sad today. I got word that my dentist of 24 years passed away. He met with a really bad car accident. I can't believe it and cannot imagine not seeing him again. If you see him, tell him I said "hi" and that I already miss him and am sorry that he went away. Like you, he also went away too soon. I love you Countessa Girl, and know that you are in my heart every hour of every day. All my love and xoxoxox's, Mommy. 7/18/09 My Precious Love, Your mommy is here again, to tell you that you are still every bit in my heart. I am sorry for being away so long, but you and I know how close we are and how we are always thinking of and taling to each other. Here at home, we all love you very much. Cody, Princess, Starr, and Chickpea, and always your mommy. Seems like everytime I go outside I always see a white butterfly and I know it has to be you - today was no exception. :0) I love you sweet girl, with all my heart. Love and xoxoxoxo's, Mommy. 8/21/09 My Sweet Girl, Just stopping by to say I love you and miss you. Hope you have made a lot of friends at RB. I bet you are the popular one - because you were always such a outgoing little girl. You were able to make friends so quickly and loved to play. Know that you are still my little girl and that I love you with all my heart. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 8/26/09 My Beautiful Countessa, You have been on my mind a lot for the past few days and I knew I had to come and talk to you. You know that your Mommy still adores you, and misses you with all her heart. Everyone is alright here, Cody is doing as well as he could - I give him an asprin everyday to keep him going and that seems to work well for him. Princess also gets an asprin as her back legs are not so strong - I think its arthritis, like Cody's. They all still love you very much and please know little girl that you are still a big part of our home. I saw a white butterfly this morning and I always know that is you - making sure that I still know that you are with me. I know. :0) I love you so much, and you will always have a big place in my heart. Love and lots and lots of xoxoxoxo's, Mommy. 11/26/09 My Precious Baby, Happy Thanksgiving! Came by to see how my beautiful girl is doing this Thanksgiving. I still love you with all of me Countessa. Not a day goes by without me thinking of you. I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving day at RB with all your little buddies - have fun and know that your Mommy still loves you to bits. xoxoxoxoxo's, Mommy. 12/7/09 My Beautiful Countessa, I love you so much and hold you in my heart every moment. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 12/16/09 Hi Baby Girl, Thinking of you and wishing you were here to spend Christmas with me this year. Still remember all the wonderful Christmas' of years ago. The other day, I found the Santa that you tore off your stocking some years ago - while you were trying to get the goodies that were inside. You and Cody had a ball that year! :0) I miss you so much and love you so, so much. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 12/24/09 My Precious Countessa, Merry Christmas my beautiful girl. My love and my thoughts are with you today as it is always. I miss you being with me again this Christmas .... but you are with me in thought and in my heart. Know that I love you so much and miss you so much. Your babies and Cody send you their love and a big Christmas kiss from each of them. Mommy sends you all her love and tons of kisses. xoxoxoxo's, Mommy. 3/6/10 My Sweet Countessa, It's been a long time since I visited here, but you know I love you so much, and talk to you every day. You still occupy a huge place in my heart and NOTHING HAS CHANGED THERE. Cody and your girls are doing well, and I know they still miss you. March is always a difficult time for me - it makes me remember the awful time we had to say goodbye. We all still LOVE YOU VERY MUCH COUNTESSA. Dan and I still TALK about you - all the time. :0) We talk about what a sweet loving girl you are. Stay close to Mommy and know that you are ALWAYS IN MY HEART. xoxoxo's, Mommy. 3/23/10 My Beautiful Countessa, It's been four years since you left Mommy. I still have a very hard time emotionally when this time comes around. I start to think of all that happened these next few days starting today, and I just want to run away and find someplace safe, some place to hide from these days, but I can't find that place. Today, four years ago, was when we first noticed that you were not well. I was so sure that when you went to the vet that all would be alright- but it was not.... this connection I have with you is even too powerful for me to understand. You are my precious little girl and I simply adore you ....even now. I was told today that you were put in my life to help me through the difficult years that I faced at the time. Seems like that is true ... I do believe you loved me through the worst ... and now that I have the time to love you back, you are not here ... that's the hardest part for me to live with. I love and miss you with all my heart my precious, precious girl. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 3/25/10 This day will forever be burned in my memory. I thought about you all day Countessa and wished I could just have you back. But you are where you have to be for now, and I will just wait for the day when I can see you again and hold you forever. I love you so much. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 4/14/10 My Precious Girl, Just want you to know that I love you sooooo much. Still, never a day goes by without me thinking of you. Cody and the your girls send you love and xoxoxo's, and you know your Mamma always has a heart full of love for you. Take care of yourself my beautiful girl, and remember you are still with Mommy always. Love and xoxoxoox's, Mommy. 5/3/10 My Precious Countessa, You know how my heart is breaking today....even though I know you are happy to have your precious baby Chickpea with you; as she come to be with you at RB last night. We miss her so terribly here. She was such a sick little girl these past few weeks, but she put up a huge fight to be able to stay with us .... but she couldn't stay, and we couldn't hold on to her... four doctors tried to help her but to no avail. Please hold her extra tight for me, and shower her with kisses. I know she knows that her Mommy here loved her to bits and still does, just like I still love you. But now she is with her real mommy. Nothing will ever change that. Cody, Princess and Starr are very sad, I know they know that Chickpea is no longer with us.... I can sense their sadness and withdrawal since she left to go to the pet hospital. But you take care of yourself my little heart, and love and care for your little girl, and know that you both are in my thoughts will forever be in my heart. Love and xoxoxox's, Mommy. 5/21/10 My Sweet Countessa and Chickpea, I came here to tell you both how much I love you and to tell you also that you both are so missed. Chickpea, today your ashes were brought back home .. so in a way you are back home. You came back in fine style - Dan picked you up and brought you back on his motorbike and he said that before he could head home - he was standing and thinking about you and in that short time he notice a beautiful butterfly that came and hovered around him and the bike. I absolutely know that had to be you .. telling him "lets go home - take me back to Mommy." I know your spirit is not in that box, instead it is free... you are happily frolicking now; as you loved to do by your mother's side at RB. Just know that I will hold on to what remains of you and Countessa for as long as I can and cherish you both and remember all the love you both gave me, and also know that I love you both SO MUCH and you both will ALWAYS live in my heart. Love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. 10/27/10 My Precious Girl, I may not come here as often as I should, but you know that I think of you all the time .. every day. You are still my LOVE. I hope you are taking care of your little girl Chickpea .. I wish she was here with me too, but you loved her so much .. so its fitting that she followed you and is now with you. I know you will love her to bits. Dan and I still think of you and talk about you ALL THE TIME. I still have your basket of toys that you loved.. they are on top of my bookshelf and will remain there for always. Know that Mommy loves you so, so much - just the same as I ever did. Kiss my Chickpea for me and here are a thousand kisses for you - my precious baby. Love and xoxoxox's, Mommy. 12/31/10 My Beatiful Girl, We both know how much I love and think of you. I missed you so much this Christmas, but you were with us in a very special way - I hung the glass heart that I keep your hair in on the top of the Christmas tree for all to see and for me to see you whenever I looked at the tree. Your two girls Princess and Starr are doing well, as is your loving pal Cody. They had a lovely time and I was grateful to share this Christmas with them. We all love you so much Countess. I especiall adore you just as much as I did when you were here with me. I still dream of you often and it's always pure joy when I do. Take care of your self my precious girl and know that you are very much alive in your Momma's heart. All my love and xoxoxo's, Mommy. HAPPY NEW YEAR! 3/24/11 My Beautiful Precious Countessa, You have been on my mind all day. I've been thinking back on how sick you were this time, five years ago. I stayed home from work that day and tried my best to do all that the vet asked that I do for you. But you just kept getting sicker, only thing was I didn't realize just HOW sick you really were. I kept thinking that with each bit of medicine you took, you were going to get better. Anyways, this is where I've been in my mind all day. Wishing there was some miracle that could have happened. I love you so much Countessa, just the same as when you were here with me. You were such a special girl and you still live in my heart. Your two girls Princess, and Starr are doing well. Cody, your special boy, is still enjoying life. He follows me all over the house, actually they all follow me all the time ... and I just love all the attention. :0) Wish you were here with me too. Know that you are still my SPECIAL GIRL. Till we meet again my baby. All my love and oxoxo's, Mommy. 1/2/13 My Beautiful Baby, What a couple of years 2011, and 2012 have been! But I survived them and thought of you always right through all that was going on. Countessa, you are still my precious girl and I love you as ALWAYS. I promise to come visit you here more regularly this year . I hope you are playing with Cody, Starr, Princess, and Chickpea. I love you, miss each one of you, even though I know it is next to impossible to have you all with me today; you are all always in my heart. You all were such precious gifts and I feel blessed for the years I got to spend with each one of you ... I know you all made me a better person for having been in my life. Love and kisses to you my Countessa,and to Cody, Starr, Prinny, and Chickpea xoxoxo. Love always, Mommy. 4/2/13 My Precious Countessa, My love for you remains the same. March 25th makes 7 years that you left me. I still think of you and love you like I did then, nothinging has changed. Lots of other changes have taken place; some good and some very difficult, but I'm sure you,ve seen and shared them all with me, because I know you are still with me always and that I am nost certain of, brcause I know you will NEVER leave me. I love you sweet baby and I always will. Kiss all my other loves that are with you - Cody, Starr, Prinny and Chickpea, but keep my love and the biggest chunk of my heart for yourself. Love you awlays. Mommy. I broke my elbow; but you know all about that .. :0) xoxoxo. 3/25/14 Mamma is still here Countessa, and I still love you just as much as I ever did. Thought about you last night and cried myself to sleep. How can that be after 8 years...and I'm still missing you like you left yesterday. You will always stay in my heart and I know one day I WILL SEE YOU AGAIN. Kiss all my other puppy babies for me and know that I love you so very much. Love, Mamma. xoxox. 7/2/14 Hello my precious Countessa, Happy Birthday my sweet girl! I wish you were here so I could give you a big hug and kiss, but I know you are still around me. I still think of you with love and remember all the wonderful years we both had. I will never forget you my girl. Know that Mommy loves you and always will. xoxoxo. 3/25/15 Hello My Precious Girl, I still love and miss you like it was yesterday. You are still in my thoughts and especially in my heart. I still hurt when I think of this day 9 years ago. I still can remember every minute of that dreadful day. But you will always live on in my heart and I will love and miss you always. Kiss my other puppies for me. Love to you precious girl. Love, Momma. xoxoxo.
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