Needless to say, my son was so happy when we returned to his camp with the new puppy. He named him Diego because he had just seen Beverly Hills Chihuahua and thought that the name of the hero dog was Diego. The entire family immediately fell in love with Diego, but over time, i.e., as soon as my son entered middle school, Diego became my dog. I had never owned a dog before so I wasn't sure what to expect. But over time I came to love Diego more that I could have ever imagined. I am a lawyer and have been working out of my home office for several years so I got to spend every day with Diego. He would sleep at my feet below my desk every day. I would take him on off-leash walks in the hills above my house virtually every day. And when I wasn't that busy, we would go on an all-day hike to the Marin Headlands north of the Golden Gate bridge. He would run on the beach, I would throw his ball and we would hike to the summit and look out across the Pacific Ocean. One day, we were both sitting at the top of the summit at sunset and I told myself that life doesn't get any better than this and that I wouldn't want to be any other place in the world than with Diego watching the sunset at Rodeo Beach. Diego was so affectionate, warm, loving and kind. I think that he was really more of a person than a dog. Maybe this is true for all German Shepherds. As everyone who reads this knows, your dog becomes your best friend and constant companion. Diego was a member of the family. We went everywhere together, camping, hiking, mountain biking, to the snow in Lake Tahoe, to my in-laws for Thanksgiving. Diego loved swimming in lakes and ponds. If he saw a puddle or creek, he would immediately go lie down in the water and just look at you with his ball in his mouth. More often than not, after sitting in really muddy puddles, Diego would require a hose bath when we got home. He loved chasing those spikey squeaky balls when we would go on hikes or walks. When he was done running after the ball, he would just keep it in his mouth for the rest of the walk.

About a year ago, he woke up one morning and couldn't walk. He couldn't pick up his right hind leg. The vet told us that he had a herniated disc which required surgery. After surgery, he was able to walk, but he couldn't jump into my car any longer. He just didn't have the same strength in his hind legs. We still went on walks and hikes and to the beach, but he needed to take more breaks. Anytime Diego saw some shade in the grass under a tree, he would just sit down on the grass and squeak his ball. He didn't know that he was getting old and couldn't go on strenuous hikes any longer. He would still try to jump in my car, but I had to give him a boost. He slept a little bit longer under my desk during the day, and we stopped going on hikes every day, just every other day. And the walks were on flat trails. But he was always so excited to run to my car when he knew that we were going out.

Last week, he was more lethargic than usual after our hike. We had gone to a nearby small lake where I would throw the ball into the water and he would swim out to fetch the ball. I thought that he was just over-tired. Then he stopped eating and started drinking a lot of water and had diarrhea. I also noticed that his belly was bloated. He had always had digestive problems so I gave him flagyl which normally eliminated his diarrhea. But this time it wasn't working. Finally, last Sunday he was having so much difficulty walking that I took him the vet emergency. I simply thought that maybe he had some stomach blockage, but he was immediately diagnosed as having hemangiosarcoma and wasn't going to live more than another week. I was in shock. I couldn't bear to watch him suffer any longer so we had to put him down. I was hugging him and crying as they injected him. He didn't know what was going on and I just felt so sorry for him. I am crying right now as I write this story.

I guess that I am writing this memorial because I really don't know what else to do. I have been crying off and on for three days. I look under my desk and Diego is not there. I could never have believed how painful this could be.

When I got home on Sunday after putting down Diego, I immediately texted by neighbor Keith who is retired and loved Diego. Keith would often send me a text and ask me if he could take Diego on a walk. After getting my text on Sunday, Keith rushed over to my house and knocked on my door. When I opened the door, Keith was just standing there with the saddest face. He then gave me a big hug and we both started crying. It must have looked pretty weird to see two old guys in their 60s hugging and crying. But that is how everyone felt about Diego. Everyone who met Diego fell in love with Diego.

So now I am in that state of walking around the house and seeing everything that reminds me of Diego and it's really hard trying to keep it together. I know that this grief will subside over time, but I also know that for the rest of my life I will always feel the loss of Diego and the emptiness that he leaves behind. The only thing that makes me happy now is knowing that we gave him a really good life and that he is no longer suffering.

I love you buddy and miss you terribly.