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October 19, 2008. Three days ago on October 16, 2008 I lost my buddy of 18 years. You are my beautiful baby boy. I can't believe you are gone from me. Dear God you've always been there. Words fail to describe you at this moment in time sweet Gussie Cat. I love you so much, you are such a part of me. I just wish I felt you closer again. Just know how much I love you, I could say that to you forever and it would never be too much. October 30, 2008 I still just can't believe it Gussie Cat. I know it was God's time to take you, but somehow even after all the time, it is just too soon I can't talk to you anymore or kiss you or tell you how much I love you or say what I always said to you so simply. "You are Mommy's Friend baby boy". That was all you wanted I believe as you purred and purred whenever I said that to you. I"m visiting you now. You are the most wonderful faithful friend anyone could have. No fanfare just a quiet powerful presence. A lion hearted boy in a little kitty cat suit. I want to tell your stories little sweet heart and I will soon. Scottie purrs when I tell him Gussie loves him. I hope you are playing and loving our sweet baby boy Brahmie Rahmie. I hope he turned you in 10 circles when you got there to join him. He knew just how special you were and he loved you and I know he loves you now. It is my fondest wish to see you both together again best friends as you Gussie deserve the most loving friends because that is what you are sweet heart. November 2, 2008 Oh Gussie Cat, Sundays are so hard, I miss you so much today and can hardly believe you're not here, 18 years. How can I thank God enough for bringing you to me. How can I thank you enough for your precious intelligence and sense of the ironic humor always like you were laughing at how silly we were. How can I thank you for your love and devotion. I thank Jesus for the gift you are and were to me. My sweet little boy. You are amazing - you are such a part of me. I guess you weren't forever however, I need to believe you are with Him now and with Brahmies I pray and I will see you in heaven my little darling. It was so hard yesterday to empty your litter box I wish I hadn't. I found some of your fur. I remember this with Brahmies, looking for something some part of you to have with me still. I love you my baby boy. I am so glad you are no longer sick and weak. Dear God I'd do anything to see you healthy and whole again. I love you sweet baby. November 16, 2008 Oh I just mistyped 2007, Oh Gussie Cat if it were last year at this time, you'd still be here. Here is my tribute to you my little sweetheart Dear Sweet Boy, What a life well lived you had sweet Gus. Today and yesterday have hurt so much and as I'm sitting here writing this I am realizing that God needed me to see so many things about you. He needed me to see that even when you hurt and when you were weak or when you had to deal with other kitties (suddenly there were 7 one morning thanks to Miss Lucy - after being an only kitty, or many moves before we got to our house- even through a life that was no picnic you were a picture of love and grace. Don't get me wrong, you had enough spunk for 3 kitties and you yelled sometimes and bit sometimes and hissed at Lucy - you were a cat's cat and God bless you baby you went through hell some days I know you did and yet the morning you left you purred to me. You'd stopped eating, it was hard to breath and yet in your remaining breaths you purred that you loved me. The day before that, you sat on me for an hour and gave purrs, just as you had all your life. You are the very essence of the words grace and beauty. How much more precious were those purrs when you were almost too sick to breathe. And of course those needles, every morning and night for half your life, getting that insulin no more of those stupid poking needles. You took it all like a little lion, you loved and loved. The vets and their assistants saw you too. Wednesday Oct15th when I got the bad news that you were now beyond healing, one of the techs told me she'd just met you but you were a very sweet kitty cat. I remember you THAT day your last full day on this earth, sicker and frailer than I'd ever seen you. They didn't know you like I did but they all knew you were. Your friend Brahmie Rahmie was a very bright light that went out too quickly, you his sweet friend and step daddy were a constant flickering light,there for 18 years faithful and loving to the end. I guess I needed to see that you can have love and grace even when the stupid needles in your life poke you in the same spot over and over again, even when you feel too weak to stand, you get up, you walk around the house, you are happy to be home and eat and for God's sake you purr and give love. I try to do that baby boy, in your honor now especially. My little sunshine, you left just me before winter You took some of that sunshine with you a month ago on October 16th, I just need to pray now that someday it comes back. I do know I can't wait to see you and Brahmies again, my little orange boys. Oh Gussie there is a part of my heart that just aches for you December 16(17), 2008 Sweet Gussie Cat As I grow older I will catch fewer mice, My sweet little boy what can I say. I wish I knew that you felt But you were the best jumper, the smartest the most sensitive boy... An angel sent for your mom so she'd know there were angels, there was love I love you my sweet lion hearted little boy. It's July 1st, 2023 and I hope and pray you are with Mom and Dad and Brahmie and Lucy and Scottie now.. My little sweet angel, my best buddy for 18 years, love you so much. I think of a gentle lion, such grace in the face of way too much sickness for one little boy to bear. Sweet boy!! Please also visit Brahms. |
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