Thank you for all the special thoughts and comforting words. I am unable to send Thank You cards back for some reason. So I do want you to know that I do appreciate your kindness.

My life with Lights was unique. He was a horse I rode for another couple while I was going through a divorce. He was a Chestnut Arabian. He had recently been cut, so he was no longer a Stallion at the age of 7 years old. Beautiful mane and tail. The Mane to his shoulders.

A young man tried to ride him. He was having a hard time, so I was asked to try or I asked to try...I completed in endurance for 25, 35 and 50 mile events and they felt like I would be good for him...just let him be himself. We were a match.

I was lonely and he comforted me when I struggled through a divorce. So I spent my time with him. Then, after the divorce was over and I met my husband, Glenn...he was shocked at how nice horses were..that they came up and wanted to be with you.

So the couple could not afford to even feed him and I offered to pay his board and feed to get his papers and that is how he came to be my horse. I had him since 1995 and he and I rode many trails together. He was beautiful and though I tried to teach him to be slow on the trails...once he learned endurance competition...racing was in his blood and he loved it.

I did retire him after a couple of falls because I decided it was not worth it to lose a horse over a bucket that I could buy at a feed store. So we would trail ride. He could spot another endurance horse on a trail ride in a minute and it was on! Off we'd go! All heart.

The last morning, he broke he leg. I thought he was on the ground because he was colicking. He had walked a good 10 acres to lay in front of the door in 17 degree weather , so when I let the dogs out...I would see him.

Jesse , my Tennessee Waking Horse, ran circles around him to protect him as he would get up and fall down. My other horses stood at a distance a watched.

I ran for socks, cell phone and coveralls. Quickly put on my boots. I grabbed his halter and leadline and then, went to the pasture while dialing the vet office for help for colic. The answering service picked up and said that they were not open yet, but would be in 30 mins and colic was not and emergency. That is when I saw Lights get back up as I walked to put the halter on him and saw his hind leg was broken and he was walking on bone, not hoof.

I replied the hind leg is broken and this is a emergency. My horse needs to be put down. I was told colic and a broken leg are not an emergency and to call back in 30 mins. when the office is open.

I replied that I did not have time to argue. I would have to shoot my own horse and hung up.

I, then, called a friend who lives nearby and is married to a sheriff's deputy that deer hunts and asked him to come and bring his rifle. It was very hard. Girlfriends came to be with me.
But the hardest part was to tie him to a post and walk away to allow someone to shoot him and not look at him or be with him. For that I have been very angry.

But, my vets have been angry, too. They deal the with the answering service and hopefully, this will never happen to anyone else or their patients again under their care.

I am having to move forward. It is hard. I do keep seeing a Robin at Lights grave site. It looks at me through the window and boldly faces me whether I am inside or outside the house. It does not fly away. It may hop a few feet away, but it stays for now.

I am grieving. I miss my Lights, My Little Arabi.

02/10/09:

The Robin came back today and I took a picture. The Robin actually flew up to the post where I had to tie him to let me take the picture.

02/25/09

The Robin stays. I still cry. I heard Garth Brooks sing this song, "The Dance" yesterday. I couldn't hear it on the site until today. Last night friends and I celebrated cowgirls February birthdays...late, for me. Because it would have been hard to do it sooner. Then, to add to the grief, one of my dogs, Callye Rye , was attacked by an alligator. Fortunately, the other dogs attacked back and saved her. She is still healing from her wounds. Serious injuries, but a lot for one month. I go to see her every day to be sure she knows she is not being left behind. She is depressed a bit right now. Hard to lift her spirits when mine are a bit low..but I am trying.
Thank you.

04/16/09

I have not been able to come back for a while. My dog is doing better. I do still grieve Lights being gone. Hard to see the pasture with three horses. One is missing. I have his head stone which is very nice. Friends brought over a wreath for the grave site. I struggle. Another horse is available, but I am not able. It's not the same thing. I find comfort knowing he is buried here with Zippy and Frost. I thank each of you for the kind words. That is a comfort.

One other thing, I have had to learn to forgive others...who just do not know...like the answering service. But, he got out of pain as soon as possible. Thank God!

1/11/10

Callye Rye died in August. A moccasin bit her. P.J. died yesterday. So you have more company.

2/4/10

Still missing you. Tears are still shed for my little Arabi. Losing you on our special day was bitter.

2/10/10

Jesse and I rode through the woods and by the Swanee River this past week-end for two days. It was beautiful. You would have run your heart out and loved it. Jesse was full of fire. He is doing so much better since his surgery. You'd never know he had been sick. A starving dog showed up for a few meals as I was almost home. Then, she left after two days. I called her Sweetie while she was here. The weather has turned cold. Your daddy may be sick, so I am concerned for him. We go see a specialist soon. We need to talk to the kids. God puts us through trials and we must understand He wants us to glorify Him in the trials and say "Thank you, Lord". So I thank God for you. The joys we shared and even the pain we shared.

1/08/11
Lights,
This year has been hard as we lost Connie the Coonhound this Summer, followed by Hughston and then Duke died a day after Hughston in December of 2010. Woodpeckers kept showing up those days. You are still missed and I still have your pictures and theirs up. It is cold now. We did get some rescue dogs for the farm two coonhounds Bubba and Guppy. Bubba is walker hound and Guppy is a Black and Tan Coonhound. It was too quiet without them. We have a puppy that came before Hughston died, Jody, a black lab. Nothing replaces the love of any of you. My heart is big enough to love more, but I miss my old family, too. Hugs!

2/04/11

Lights,
It's bitter sweet. Horsey friends do understand as does my husband. Family forgets. But, today I spent with my husband and cowgirls, they helped me laugh. but, I still have cried quite a bit this week over you. You know we have three Belgians and I drive them on a wagon. We rescued them from situations where the owners could not afford to feed them any longer. So we still move forward, but I still have your picture when we ran Million Pines. I look at it every night. Missing you.

02/04/12

I thought I was better this day, but I woke up missing you and shed a few tears. I did have a wonderful , quiet day. I still look at your picture every day. Then, I cried again tonight when someone mentioned you. My heart still suffers that you had to suffer. But, I know you do not any more. I just miss you and so many that were around us. You could run like the wind and you kept me on my toes. But, you were such a great horse. So beautiful.

Belle Belgian had to have surgery. I am sick with pneumonia, so the MD and the vet will not allow me to care for her at this time. But, you know they are missed and I will be delighted to have them home.

Bubba and Guppy have taken very well to the farm and love the care. Bubba has finally gained some weight. Guppy is serious about protecting me.

Dolly Belgian misses her Bob and Belle as Bob is keeping Belle company at the horsepital. I probably have as many photos of my kids and grands as I do of horses loved and now, gone and as well as , dogs and cats.

But, you were the horse my husband wanted me to have and no one else would you allow to ride you, but me. You were my Arabi. Love Lights at the end of the Tunnel!

I still miss you even 3 years later.

12/16/2014 A friend's horse was put down. Her tears brought back memories of losing you. Recently, Rock died. So our sweet 13 yearold Black and Tan Coonhound is with you. Your daddy was so sad that we rescued a Old Fashioned 1 year old Black and Tan male name Todd. He came a few weeks after Rock crossed the Rainbow Bridge in his sleep. I miss you Lights!

02/04/15 I miss you Lights. You never me t Bubba, our Treeing Walker Coonhund Rescue, but noe he has either passed or been stolen. I pray he did not suffer or is with kind people until he can get home. Today is especially hard. I love you my Arabi.