I knew she was dying, the vet diagnosed her with feline renal failure. By the time I realized she was seriously ill, it was too late. My heart is just broken into a million pieces.

I thought her being a young kitty would mean she wouldn't die for a long time. She was only 7.

It all happened so fast, just a month ago, I lost my "yard" kitty (belonged to the neighbor, but hung with me). I worry I spent too much time with the other kitty, and not enough with my precious little Mazie. Not knowing she was sick, makes me so angry with myself. I can't believe I didn't notice in time. I feel so worthless. I couldn't save my sweet little kitty that trusted me unconditionally. She was so kind and loving, I feel I let her down without measure.

I can only hope she is at the Rainbow bridge and I get to see her again some day. I will tell her how sorry I was to been such a careless person. I shouldn't have let other things get in the way of spending time with her.

She used to hurry to the door when I was leaving the house. To try to get me to pet her and stay a little longer, she would twist around sometimes let out a little sound (she wasn't very talkative unless I really encouraged her). Sometimes I would sit on the step, stop and pet her. Just didn't do it nearly enough. I though we would have years together to do that. I was so wrong.

I will post a picture of her, but most of the ones I have don't do her justice. She was an orange tabby (short-hair) with big gold eyes. She had some white on her too. People who saw her always said how pretty she was. I got her and her sister when a lady at my work needed to find a new home for them. They thought Mazie was the "unfriendly" one and couldn't believe it when she allowed me to pet her immediately. I got my kitty girls 5 years ago last spring.

I have so many memories of her, and I'm sure every day will remind me of another one.
She would tuck her head in the crook of my arm when on my lap. I guess I'm just in shock.
I can't believe how much I will miss her.

I hope she can forgive me for not being there today and so many days. I will miss her forever.

December 4, 2012
It seems so long ago I got to see her little face when I came home. I miss her now and always. I so wish I could hug her and hold her on my lap. Dear little friend, gone but never forgotten!!!

December 21, 2012
3 years today. I still miss her. When a kitty touches your heart like this one did, you never forget them. She was just so sweet. She was kind of timid, so I know with my impatience and/or "lack" of time, I would walk away without taking the time I should have with her. She was so loving, just needed a chance to be "brave" and come see me. Why did I think I would have so much time with her? Just stupid of me. I will hold her in my heart forever and pray I will see her again some day.

December 21, 2015
It has been 6 years. I can't hardly believe it has been so long since I saw here little face and petted her. I still miss her, I tell her sister (Mossy, who I still have) that I miss little Mazie. Feels like so much has happened in these 6 years. If I ever make it to heaven, I hope to hold her in my arms again. :(