We will always love and cherish all the fun times and there were too many to write about. You are in heaven now our son. Rest peacefully and know you are forever in our hearts - our boy, my POOPER DOOPER! |
Mommy and Daddy
1/16/12 - its only been 3 days since you have left us and our lives are so empty. mommy and daddy miss you so much. the house feels like our hearts "empty" with out you. good night our sweet boy and we will talk to you in the morning.
1/17/12 pm - Well today we picked up your ashes our little boy. We also picked up your medical records and see how sick you really were. We are so thankful to have had you in our lives for the years we did but it's so hard not having you here with us. Now you are back home with us where you belong and will always be, by our sides. We love you our son and miss you terribly.
3/2/12 - Morning my baby, well today is 7 weeks since you left us. Mommy is sitting here at work just staring into space thinking about you and missing you so much. This week has been a really hard week for me and Mommy has been in a really bad mood for some reason. I think alot is because I miss you so much and also Mommy is worried for Nanny. She went for her next scan and we get the results today to see if she is still cancer free. So Nik if you can help Nanny to remain cancer free that would be wonderful. So many sad things are happening lately and Mommy has been so emotional. I know it all comes with getting older and it's part of life but it doesn't mean we have to like it. Mommy and Daddy miss you so much but we know you are in a better place and your health is back to normal. But we miss you our little boy so much!! Well have a great day, go play, eat and have fun. We hope you are meeting lots of nice friends up there. Until we see you again some day. We will write again soon.
7/4/12 - Happy birthday my little man, daddy is here at work and looking at your photo. We wish you were still here with us so we could celebrate your birthday but im sure your having a great time in heaven with all your friends. Please know that mommy and daddy miss you every minute of every day. It is not getting any easier, the pain of losing you is still with us. Just the other night i swear that i felt you lying between my legs on the bed. Just know that Mommy and Daddy still and will always love you and miss you. Have a beautiful birthday in heaven and make sure you dont eat to much cake and play to much.
7/4/12 - Hi Nik, Mommy didn't want this day to go by without writing to wish you a Happy Birthday! We hope you are having fun today and every day up in Heaven. We miss you so much my baby and hope you are doing ok. The same night Daddy thought he felt you laying between his legs, a few minutes later I thought I heard you jump off the bed and make that thumping sound you always made! We love you baby. Mommy is going away for a few days starting tomorrow with Aunt Irene but I will be bringing your ashes with me and holding them close to my heart. I'll write when I get back Nik but remember we love you very much. Enjoy the rest of your birthday and we'll talk to you soon. Keep coming to us because that joy of knowing you are with us helps us get through this horrible time of missing you.
12/23/12 - Hi baby, Mommy just wanted to write to you and say an early Merry Christmas! We miss you so much and preparing for the holidays just has not been the same without you. Daddy put up his Christmas decorations outside but said it was not the same, not having you inside barking at him, wanted to come out and be with him. Mommy only did alittle decorating inside this year because I'm just not into the holidays. In time I'll get better but right now I'm just down in the dumps. We're going to Nan and Pops for Christmas Eve but you will be with us in our hearts as you always are. We miss you my baby but have a wonderful holiday and Merry Christmas. Give everyone up in heaven a big hug and kiss for us. We'll again again soon but Merry Christmas baby.
01/14/13 - Hi baby, I don't want to say Happy Anniversary because it certainly is not a HAPPY one. It is so hard to believe that yesterday/last night 1/13 was 1 year since you left us and went up to heaven and rainbow bridge. Mommy and Daddy took a ride up to Mohegan Sun on Saturday and stayed overnight because Mommy just didn't want to be in the house for the weekend. I really needed to be away from the place that me and Daddy laid crying for some many hours after you left us. I know there is nothing we can do to bring you back but we miss you so much. Nothing has been the same since you left us. The house is very empty and lonely. Daddy is very unhappy at work and Mommy is starting to worry about him and also think it may be time to start looking to begin our life over again. But we will wait it out again for another few months and see if things get any better. We miss you so much Nikker and hope you realize you are forever in our hearts, prayers, thoughts and dreams. It's been a while since we've had you come to us in dreams, actions, etc. so if there's a way you can start to come to us again, please do. We love you - FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER!!!
7/4/13 - Happy birthday baby!!! Well today is your 16th birthday and we know you are celebrating it up in heaven and hope you are having a great time. We miss you so much Nik and not a day goes by that we both don't think about you. Mommy is still very sad that you are not here with us but I understand. Mommy and Daddy may be moving to Florida very soon so we can start all over again. It's going to be hard to leave nan and pop up here alone but they keep saying they will be ok so watch over them Nik, okay! I plan to see them every few months with the help of God and him keeping us all healthy and safe. At first I thought I couldn't leave this house because you were here with us but then I realized you were with us in our other condo and you will always be with us no matter where we live, here on earth, or in heaven. We just wanted to wish you a happy birthday and also thank you for showing us you are still here with us and for fixing the washing machine once again. When we do sell the house we are going to bring our washer and dryer with us because it just reminds me of you way too much for me to let go of it. Daddy did get the picture of you finished and he will be getting a tattoo done in August so he will always have you with him in a special way. Mommy is also going to get some small paw prints as a tattoo with your name so I have you with me permanently as well. I love you so much baby and still miss you deeply. Keep coming to me in whatever way you can and know that mommy and daddy love and miss you so much.
7/30/13 - Hi Nik, today is Mommy's birthday and I wanted to say hi and share a little piece of my birthday with you. We miss you so very much but know you are always with us. We haven't found out anything further about possibly moving to FL yet so for now we are still in the house. There is a lot of uncertainty right now which is very frustrating but in time I know things will work out. I can't write too much today because the amount of space we can use to write to you is getting low but I did want to say hi and tell you Mommy knows you are here with us each and every day. Daddy sent me roses today at work and it made me think of my birthday a few years ago, when we first moved into the house, when Daddy sent me roses and balloons for my birthday and later in the day we took pictures of me holding you in my arms. I'll always have the pictures and memories but I do miss my little baby. I love you Nik! Have a great day and go play with your friends.
12/2/13 - Hi Baby, we know it's been a while since we wrote to you but you are forever on our minds and in our hearts. Mommy wanted you to know that Nan and Pop had to send Kodee up to heaven with you today. Mommy is sad today Nik because Kodee was the one that helped Mommy deal with not having you around anymore and now both of you are gone. He was so sick and we all just couldn't bear to see him suffer anymore. So now you are both together again and hopefully playing and enjoying what is probably a beautiful sunny day at Rainbow's Bridge up in heaven. Please take good care of each other and all the other pets we've had and know we all love and miss you very much. Watch over each other but play and enjoy, we will all be together again some day but until that comes just know we miss our little boy each and every day. Have a great day my son.
1/13/14- Hi Nikki, Well today makes it 2 years since you left Mommy and I. Not a day goes by that we don't think about you or talk about you. We miss you more every day and things around the house have changed since you have left. When you left a part of us died with you. You are now tattooed on my leg and will be with me forever. I had the photo of you down at the shore done because it was my favorite photo of you. It was taken on the dock where you used to look at the ducks. We miss you very much and always will. Make sure Kodee is ok up there, i'm sure he is healthy and running around with you and your friends. Nan and Pop got a new dog, a little guy named Toby. He is a puppy and kinda nuts but a good dog (not as good as you though). Well i just wanted to tell you that we love you and miss you every day and we will always love and miss you till the day we meet. That is a day that i cant wait for, to see you and have you sit in my lap like you used to. But that will come in time. Have fun playing with your friends and once in a while show your presence in the house, mommy really needs to make sure that you still are in the house with us. Sat hi to Kodee for us and i will write soon.
1/13/14 - Hi baby, Mommy just wanted to say hello and let you know we miss you so very much. It's hard to believe that today is 2 years since you left us. We miss you more and more with each passing day. I see that daddy already told you to watch out for and play with Kodee and also that Nan and Pop got a new dog. He's cute, he's a small white maltese and in some ways reminds me of when you were a pup and used to run, bite and chew everything in sight. Nan and Pop aren't used to having such a small dog around but hopefully this is a good thing for them. Mommy really hasn't felt you around the house at all lately and wish you would come to us in some way. I miss you so much and each time I play with Toby I keep seeing you and enjoying all our memories from your crazy puppy days! Well I just wanted to say hi. I won't say Happy Anniversary because for me and daddy it's not really a happy day but it is a day we will never forgot. In time we will all be together but Mommy and Daddy really want to enjoy the rest of our lives together and hopefully things will become a little bit easier for us in so many ways. We love you baby - have fun today, say hi to Kodee and all the other brothers you have up in heaven and enjoy your play time but get some rest.
7/30/14 - Hi Nik, Well today is Mommy's birthday and I'm sitting here thinking about you and how much mommy and daddy miss you. It is a nice day outside and actually mommy just can't wait for the work day to end so I can start our vacation. We are going to the beach and the Jersey shore and wish we were taking you with us. Not much is new with us as you already know since we always have you with us. We just miss you and hope that you are ok up there with all your brothers and the rest of our family. Please if you can, help Nanny and Pop to be able to cope with their new puppy, Toby and also maybe you can help him out to become better behaved for them. We know he's a puppy but Nan and Pop really don't have a lot of patience left and we just want them to be able to deal with him so he becomes a better dog. Send us a sign every so often that you are doing ok because we really don't feel you too often anymore but we do know you are always with us.
10/2/14 - Hi Nik, mommy just realized that it's been so long since I've written to you, so sorry baby! We hope everything is good with you and you are enjoying your time at Rainbow Bridge and up in heaven with all your brothers and the rest of our families. This past few months have been very hectic and lots of health issues for all of us but nothing life threatening thank God! Mom has had shingles for what this Sunday will be 9 weeks and it's really get old now. Plus I broke a toe and just overall have been feeling crappy. Daddy has had a few sinus and knee problems but thank god overall he is doing much better than past years with his heart. We both have not been in great moods for the past few months and Mommy knows that because of all the things I have on my mind dealing with our home, Nan and Pop, health stuff and also still missing you terribly each and every day. I cannot believe in a few short months it will be 3 years since you left us - Mommy and Daddy still miss you very, very much. Neither one of us really feel your presence in the house that much anymore. For me, maybe it's because I should be getting on with how I feel better than I am, but Nik mommy still truly misses you. Also seeing Nan and Pop get older and aging right in front of us is bothering me as well. I know it's life and I have to deal with it but it's just hard. I so want me and Daddy to be happy but these past few months and even since Daddy had to say no to the job offer in FL last October, things have been strained with us. I genuinely do want to move to FL in the future, it's just that our financial future has to get better first. We are going to FL next Wed and will be with Aunt Irene, Aunt Billie and Uncle Eddie. Please watch over us, be with us, as you are each and every day and make sure we have a safe trip so we can return home safely and then deal with what we need to do to save our home and get on with our life. Well I know I've said enough for now, just needed to talk to my baby. Had to let you know I love you and miss you and you are forever in my heart. Daddy misses you too but he deals with things much better than me. I will write again in a few months and after things settle down for us with our house, income tax training and the holidays.
12/19/14 - Morning baby, mommy and daddy just wanted to say hi and wish you an very early Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Nothing has been the same since you left us and mommy is still very sad to not have you in our lifes. I still miss you each and every day and thought by now it would be so much easier than it is to not have you around but it still hurts so much. I miss holding you, cuddling with you, telling you "Nik stop it" or "Nik get over here", it's just very quiet without you. You were and will always be my baby and I do miss you so. But I do know I have to get on with life and realize that things change. I've just been very down lately because things just seem to be taking forever to get our house and lives back in order. I know daddy is right and it will all work out, I just wish it would move along a little faster so I can get some things off my plate and be able to get back to focusing on a happy life with daddy. Anyway baby, mommy just wanted to tell you how much we still miss you and hope you are having a great time and all healthy up in your special place. Please continue to watch over all of us and help to keep us all safe and in good health. Nan is having some bad memory issues Nik so if you can help to make her better or at least slow this entire process down to give her, pop and the rest of us a good quality of life that would be great. Miss you so baby...please come to us more often so we know you are doing ok and hear me speaking to you. Have a wonderful Christmas and we love you!!
12/31/14-Hi Nikki, Just wanted to say hi and wish you a Happy New Year and a late Merry Christmas. There is not a day that goes by that we don't think about you, talk about you and really miss you. You need to come and show yourself to us and especially mommy. She is having a tough time with some things and she could really use your help. Christmas is never and will never be the same without you being in the house. So just wanted to say that Daddy and Mommy miss you and love you very much. Keep playing with your friends and hope to see you soon...
1/13/15- Hi Nikki, just hoping that you are having a fun time playing with all your friends on your 3rd anniversary in heaven. There is not a day that goes by that we don't wish you were still with us. We miss you terribly but we know that you are healthy and safe with your friends in heaven. Please send us a sign today that you are ok and still with us. Have a great day in heaven and know that Mommy and Daddy miss you and love you more and more every day.
5/4/15 - Hi Nik, well today is actually 9 years since we bought the house and all I can think about was you when we took you to the house and you had all that room to run around. I remember you going up and down the stairs and loved the way you would just plop on the couch with daddy. We miss you very much and want you to know we always have you in our hearts. We are going on vacation on a cruise in a few weeks and will actually be away for Daddy's birthday but you will be with us, you always are. Mommy has been very busy working and also trying to help nan and pop. Nan hasn't been doing so great and we are very worried that she may have Alzheimer's but stubborn her doesn't want to see a doctor. Maybe you can send her some signs to make her realize she needs to get some help. Pop is beside himself and getting very tired and drained over the entire thing so I just keep praying every day that God will watch over them and us and keep us all safe and healthy. I know some day I will lose them like I've lost you but I do know life will go on until we are all together again. When that time comes for all of us, I hope that God doesn't allow them to suffer and we can go peacefully and no one ever has to make any harsh decisions on care or treatment. Not having you home to cuddle and just talk to while you sit with your head tilted and looking at me with your crooked teeth and smile is something I miss so much. We went on a trip 2 weeks ago for the weekend to CT and Daddy did very well. I was very happy to see him have such a good trip and such good luck, it was very overdue. Well, I'm at work and very busy but wanted to say hi to my baby. Have a great day and enjoy your friends. We will all meet again some day but until then, remember we love and miss you terribly.
7/4/15 - Hi baby - Happy 18th birthday in heaven! Mommy and Daddy are really hoping you are having a wonderful day and get to celebrate with all your friends and family up there. We miss you terribly but we know you are in a better place and all healed now. The weather here today is cloudy and a little rainy so hopefully the sun is shining bright for you up there. Things at home are ok, we got a new living room set yesterday and you would love it, very soft and comfortable. Everything else is fine, just very quiet without you. Nan and Pop are good, no major differences to speak of and all else is just ok. We just wanted to say happy birthday to our baby and miss you terribly. Have a wonderful day, run, play and enjoy.
7/30/15 - Hi Nik, well it's mommy's birthday and another day passes without you here with us. Not much is going on, just busy working and helping Nan and Pop. Nan had some surgery on Monday but is doing pretty well except for her memory problems. Toby is getting so big and is a crazy dog and you would have like him but probably thought it is too fast and playful. We miss you every day and think about you all the time. We still have all your pictures and mementos around the house and they will always be there. Well Daddy will be coming to pick me up in a few minutes but I just wanted to say hi, say I love you and miss you and share my birthday with my little boy! Enjoy your day, play with your friends and remember we love you very much.
10/1/15 - Hi baby, mommy wanted to say hello and tell you we miss you every day! We will be going away to FL for a few days starting this Sunday as long as the weather is ok because they are calling for a possible storm from a hurricane. We are really hoping we can make it out because we haven't been to FL since last Oct and need a big change in scenery. Not much else is new as I'm working tons of hours and just trying to keep up with everyday life. Daddy is good and misses you as well. We sometimes talk about maybe getting another dog but we really just can't bring ourselves to let another dog into the this house. Maybe some day when we are living somewhere else but not now, it's not fair to a pet because we would have to leave them alone too long which is something I hate we had to do with you but thank god you were such a good dog we never had to worry about you. Nan and Pop are ok but Nan is sick and having a lot of memory problems but too stubborn to go see a doctor and get any type of prescription medicine. It's really a shame because if it would help her even a little, it might make things much easier for all of us. Dad is still in his same job and I know wishing we could move but we just have to wait for another few years and get out of this financial situation we are in with the house and bills. We pray everyday you are doing well and still wish we could feel your presence a little more in the house. We do sometimes but I guess I always wish it was an everyday thing. Well Daddy is coming to pick me up shortly so I have to run but I wanted to say hi, tell you how much I miss and love you. Enjoy your days up in heaven and in rainbow bridge and someday we will see you again. We'll write again soon, please pray for all of us, pray we have safe travels, good health and that Nan and Pop will be okay as well.
1/13/16 - Morning baby, Mommy wants to say hi and I miss you. I don't really like thinking of this day because it is not a happy memory for me. It seems like forever since you have been with us and I will never forget that night when you left us. Me and daddy still think of you all the time and miss you terribly. We know you are in a better ploace and not suffering anymore but it still doesn't take away from us missing you. Four years have now passed and at times it seems like an eternity but we will all be together some day. Just know we love you and miss you. We haven't felt your presence around us in a while so whenever possible please show yourself to us. Enjoy all your friends and family up in heaven,
1/13/16- Hi Nikki, Daddy was thinking of you and wanted to say hi, this day is the worst for us because you left us 4 years ago. There is not a minute that goes by that we don't think of you. I hope you are hiving fun playing with your friends and making new ones in heaven. Maybe you can show us you are still in the house, we miss feeling your presence. Have fun running in the warm sunshine.
1/13/17- Good Morning Nikki, well another year has gone by. I cant believe that its been 5 years since you left us. The house is still not the same without you but with having your photos all around us it makes it a little easier to deal with. There is not a day that goes by that I wish you were still here with us, but I know your in heaven and feeling great running around with all your friends and not suffering. If you could please send some kind of sign that you are still with us and know that Mommy and Daddy love you and miss you terribly. You are and will be in our hearts every day until we are together again.
1/13/17 - Hi baby, mommy had to work at H&R today and then stop by nan and pop for a bit. I didn't want the day to end without saying hi and letting you know that we will never forget this date and day and most of all never forget you. We still miss you each and every day but know that you are all better know and some how that helps mommy to realize you are in the best place possible. Nan is still not doing well and pop is having a hard time but we pray daily that things will never get too bad that we can't deal. Please keep showing us signs you are here with us and know we love and miss you your always and forever, my little boy!
7/4/17 - Happy birthday baby! Mommy and Daddy wanted to say happy 20th birthday! We hope you are having a wonderful day and playing with all your friends and family. We miss you very much but know someday we will all be together. Please continue to bring us signs that you are doing ok. Also Nik, Nanny is sick and we pray everyday that this horrible Alzheimer's disease doesn't progress too much for her that we have to put her in a home or get an aide so if you have any pull to help us with this wish it would be wonderful! We love you so much baby and know we are always thinking of you.
1/14/18 - Hi baby, mommy and daddy are very sorry we are so late in writing to you. All of our lives have been upside down for many months. Daddy got badly hurt at work on 11/29 and thankfully is still here with us but needs many more month of re-cooperating and more surgeries. Nanny was so sick Nik and God allowed her to gain her wings on 12/29/officially 12/30. While it breaks our hearts to not have her with us each and every day, we know deep down she is in a much better place. She is now all healed and I know that she is up in heaven, joined by her family and loved ones and playing with you, caring for you and all the other fur babies we always owned just like she used to. My heart is so empty to have lost my mom, my best friend, but I just keep telling myself she is in a better place. While I know that's true and she is no longer suffering and free from pain, our pain is not any less. I worry so much about grandpa and pray every day that he will get through this. I have daddy here to help me through but I miss my mom terribly as there is nothing like the love of your mother. Then as things weren't bad enough, I ended up so sick but finally starting to feel better and then daddy gets hurt even more by falling from our attic stairs and breaking his right heel. This coming week is a busy one, filled with many doctor appointments and we're hoping to get some answers on dad's health and be able to move forward. We miss you so much Nik but I now need to really ask you to take care of nanny! Please make sure she is doing ok, continue to help bring us signs, signs from you and Nanny to me and dad and also to grandpa and my brother Benny. Just let us know that all is ok. We love you forever and ever and miss you so. Mom I miss you more than life itself and you will forever be in my heart, til we are all together again. Love forever and ever!
10/11/18 - Hi Nik and Mom, I'm writing to both of you in hopes you both can see and hear my thoughts and prayers. We are very sorry we haven't written, things are very busy but I know you know that. We miss you and will always love you. Life is so different for me. My heart is very heavy and empty without you but now that my dear mom is with you Nik, my heart is so much heavier. I am truly trying to cope with everything and there are good and bad days. Dad is coming along and should be going back to work by 11/26/18 which will be great for both of us so we can try to get some kind of normal life back. I'm still crazy busy with everything from home life, to work to income tax and trying to be there for grandpa. It is so hard to believe that my mom is gone for more than 9 months now. Mom, dad is doing ok but I know how much he misses you. Benny never says anything so I can't tell how he's feeling but I'm sure he misses you, he just deals in different ways. I think of you 24/7 and will never stop. I wanted to write to both you and Nikki and let you know you are forever a part of my world and life and I miss you both so much. Mom please watch over each of us and keep us all safe. I'm hoping Dad will start to go to some senior centers so he can try to keep himself busy and make some friends because I just can't be there for him every day and I will be starting income tax again soon. Well, I will write again but hoping our lives do start to fall back together. Oh ya, I'm sure you know but I had a dental problem and a dentist pulled out a wrong tooth so I've decided to file a lawsuit because I'm tired of just letting everyone walk all over me. Wish me luck and watch us Mom and Nik. Love you forever and ever. Til we see each other again. I'll write again but I'll need to remove some items from this page as we are running out of room to write. Take care and enjoy your lives up in heaven to my loves forever!!!!
1/14/19 - Morning baby, it's still hard to believe you have been gone from our lives for so long. But Mommy is happy about one thing, you have nanny up in heaven now watching over and taking really good care of you. Things are so lonely without both you and my mom, some days I just don't know how to go on without both of you but I thank God that I have daddy and pop. Life has been hectic to say the least for too many years that it just seems like we can't catch a break. First daddy had his heart attack, then we lost you, then nanny started to get sick, daddy got badly injured at work and then nanny went up to heaven. We still miss you alot Nik but we know you, along with nanny, are in a much better place. Some day we may get another pet but it will never take the place of you and it won't be while we live in NY. You are and will always be our little baby. Pop is very lonely with nan and I wish he could find something or someone to keep him busy but he is just so set in his ways and stubborn. I'm hoping nan will show him the way to give him a push to go to join these visitor centers so he can begin to meet some people his own age and start enjoying life. Have a great life up there with nanny and all her other little doggies. Love you Nik, always and forever!! Mom
7/30/19 - Morning Nik, mommy just wanted to say hi. Today's mom's 60th birthday and I'm kind of feeling sad. Miss Nanny and you and wish you were both here but I know you are both happy together so that makes me happy. Nothing much going on here. Just got back from VA Beach and a wedding with daddy and pop. Had an ok time but pop is really down and we wish we could get him out of this but we know it's hard. He misses Nanny so much as do I. Well say hi to Nanny for me and give her a big kiss.
12/23/19 - Hi baby, Mom and Dad wanted to wish you, Nanny and all the other fur babies and our family and friends a very Merry Christmas. We are doing ok but really missing you and Nanny. Nothing is really the same anymore but we all go on. I know daddy misses you as much as I do but we know you are all better and what makes me even happier is to know that Nanny is up in heaven taking excellent care of you and all our other babies. Nik, watch our us and also keep Nanny and all the others up there in your hearts and send our love and wishes. Most important is to let them all know we miss everyone and love them dearly! Give Nanny a big hug and kiss from me and grandpa. We miss her terribly but do know she is watching over all of us. Merry Christmas to you all and know how much you are all missed.
01/26/20 - Hi baby, Mom and Dad are very sorry for missing the anniversary of when you left us. Things have been really hectic with Daddy's family. Daddy's own father has been very ill with cancer and we have been spending a lot of time worrying about him and his Daddy's mom along with spending time with Daddy's family. Know we will always love you and know you are forever in our hearts. Now you have nanny and poppy (daddy's dad) with you. Please continue to watch over us as I know nanny is always taking good care of you plus watching over you and taking care of you and all the other fur-brothers you have up in heaven. We love you baby and miss you and nothing can ever take your place. Give nanny a big kiss from us and when you see Daddy's dad come over to the bridge, please give him a big kiss too.
07/15/21 - Hi baby. Mom and Dad are late on writing to you but you know you are always in our hearts. We do miss you but my joy is in knowing that both nan and pop are now up in heaven with you and taking care of you, Red and all of Nan & Pops furbabies. We miss you all more than words can even express. Mommy is so much sadder since Pop passed away. Life has really taken a horrible turn for me and I have been having a very hard time adjusting. But I know life has more left for us and hope God has many good things in store for us. Praying daddy will get a nice settlement from all the horrible injures his job has caused for him but know I must go on as life is ultimately way too short. Mom needs to retire so we can move to Florida and begin to enjoy whatever time we each have left. If not, we will still go on and be fine. We wish you were all with us but we know in time we will all be together again. Love and miss you. Give Nan and Pop a big lick for us.
1/16/22 - Hi baby, again I am late in writing to you for what is a major 10 year anniversary since you left us. My sorrow has been very deep for so many years. Both our families have been through so much for so many years but in the end when I think about my poor friend Irene's grandson LIam, I realize the things we have been through are all pretty normal for many families and all a part of living and then dying. But in the end, it doesn't make any of this any easier. I know that before 2010 we had many years of family health issues, surgeries for heart, breast cancer, Pop's eye damage and more and more. Then 2010 hit us with Dad having a horrible massive heart attack but I thank God every minute for saving him and keeping him with us. Losing you was hard enough back in 2012, then we went through so many years of family health issues. Nan started to show signs of getting Alzheimers by the end of 2014 and more signs as each year went on. 2015 Nan had her appendix out and I still think her going through that and other procedures with Anesthesia really contributed to her ending up with Alzheimer's because Nan was always a smart, sharp, intelligent woman and that disease cribbled not only her but the rest of us. Seeing her disintegrate the way she did was so heart breaking, to see my mother end up that day was so hard and sad. Mom, I miss you so much every minute of every day. Then we went through some ups and down of our own medically along with Pop and Tony's family. Tony's dad had to fight his way for many years with so many different cancers. This was another example of a wonderful man who was also taken way too soon, just like Nan and put through too much over his last years. All of these things just seem like way too much to bear but we are moving along. But after all of this loss, injuries I am trying. But losing Pop, was really hard. Being able to have the extra few years with my dad was the most precious time I could have ever had with my father and I am thankful every day for that. But losing him so fast and without having more time to say goodbye has really made me sad. I am doing better and am glad that he didn't suffer long and is now where he always wanted to me, with my mom and his wife. But if that wasn't enough to go through, then my brother/Benny had to go through his own bout with lung cancer and then chemo. And while we may not have the best relationship in the word, he is my last living blood relative and I do love him and worry about him. And now, to recently hear he isn't doing well because of this COVID pandemic and he gettinng a bad lung infection, it is just making me worry more. Well baby, now that I've spilled my guts to you about all that is troubling me, I need to tell you, I Love You and MIss You so much. While i do think getting a new puppy will help cheer my depression, it's not time. Not sure if it will every be but we first must get to FL and see what retired life will be like for us and if we will have time to devote to another puppy or it would not be fair to him. No fur baby will ever replace you. Just like you didn't replace my first fur dog, Red. You were each wonderful fur babies for me in your own and different ways and you each came into my life at the right times that i needed you. Nik, say hi to Nan and Pop and Tony's dad along with the rest of our family and friends for me and daddy. Please continue to come to us in our dreams all of you! Send signs that you are all doing good and know that we will all be together again at some time in the future (but not too soon as I want to enjoy time for me and daddy to be together). Love you forever