Memories of Casey 8/15/09 - 11/6/10
by Cindy
August 15th 2009
Casey, Its been 10 day since you have been gone. I miss you more everyday and each day I ask God to tell me why you had to suffer so much those last few days. This I will never understand. I know you forgive the Vet that lost you the Vet I trusted to protect you and keep you safe; because that's the kind of dog you were, a forgiving kind and gentle soul. But I have not been able to forgive him because it tears my heart apart to know you laid dying in the rain storms for 3 days before you were found. I can't begin to imagine your fear because you were so afraid of the rain and thunder but you were much to sick and weak to walk. Channel 4 ran a news story about you and your photo was on the news. Mommy was praying that somewhere someone had seen you and somehow I would get you back safe. The animal control found you near death and you were taken to a very kind Vet who tried for two days to revive you, you were in so much pain so he gave you good medicine to help your pain. After 2 days, you were not getting better so he felt the best most humane thing he could do was to put you to sleep to take you from your pain. That was late Tuesday evening the same day the news story came out but no one saw it until you were gone, and then they found me because of the story. I was contacted and told of your fate. I only find comfort in knowing your last 2 days on earth, you were being loved and your pain was being taken care of. The Vet who put you to sleep told me what a good boy you were, he said he knew how much you were suffering and never, not one time did you try to bite him. You never would bite anyone, you were so kind and gentle. He told me he rubbed your ears and told you you were a good boy as he put you to rest forever. I know if they would have seen your story on the news before they put you to sleep, they
would have called me and I could and would have been there with you, holding you, loving you and you would have felt safe in my arms. Casey I am so very sorry I was not there for you, I hope you can forgive me and I pray you know how very much I loved you.
Maggie and Boo Boo miss you so much, they are so confused. I talk about you a lot and somehow I think they understand. You remember how Maggie barks at every animal she sees on TV and we can't watch any shows with animals because Maggie never stops barking. Well, the night you were on TV we were laying in bed watching the story and Maggie saw you, she ran to the end of my bed and started to bark, suddenly, she stopped barking her ears went back and she began to whimper. I know she knew it was you and she was so confused. How sad we all are without you Mr. Casey.
I had a wonderful 8 years with you. Do you remember the day we rescued you. You were probably the most pitiful dog at the shelter. You were so skinny, dirty, and your eyes told a story of what you had been through. We took you home and you immediately loved us all, you showed your love with the kindness that we always saw in your eyes. It didn't take long to fatten you up, you loved to eat and you loved your chew bones and yes, you loved all the people food. Chicken and ice cream were the two foods you loved most of all. I made sure you always had plenty. You would get so excited about your morning breakfast, you would wake me up every morning before 5 a.m. so I would get your breakfast ready. I never minded, I loved you so much, and I loved making you happy.
I miss you Casey and there is not a minute of the day when I am not thinking about you. If people were more like dogs there could be heaven on earth.
There was something about you Casey, you had a depth about you that showed in your eyes. You seemed to understand more than most dogs; you had incredible peace in your heart that showed through your eyes. You followed me everywhere, I must have tripped over you a hundred times a day. I miss not having you here, sitting next to me while I am on the computer, sitting in the kitchen while I made dinner, you never got in my bed unless it was storming out and then you'd jump right up. I never minded, in fact I loved having you next to me. You had your doggy bed in my room and you would scratch it and paw at it every night to get it just right. I remember when I bought you a new bed just a few months before you died. You hated the new bed, and every night you would push it out of the way and sleep on the floor. I felt so sorry for you so I went to the store where I bought your other bed and found one just like your old bed. Yes, you were so Happy, life was good again.
Casey, you were loved beyond the words I write, I don't think I could ever explain in words how much I loved you and how much I miss you.
I have to believe that there is a place that you have gone and I must believe that when my time comes we will be together again. If I didn't believe that I could never go on without you.
I am sure that in time I will be able to think of you without tears and I am sure one day I will be able to only remember the goodness of having a best friend like you. Right now the pain I feel is still too much to comprehend. But I decided to add you to the rainbow bridge as a tribute to your life. I will never forget you and I know when others see you here they will know the greatness about you. You were one of the best Casey and I will always love you.....

August 16th, 2009
Good morning Casey, I love you and I miss you so much. Morning is not the same without you. You loved the morning, going outside, and especially eating breakfast. You would get so excited to eat. It saddens my heart to know I will never feed you again. I hope God knows how much you loved ice cream and I hope heaven is full of all your flavors. Maggie and Boo Boo miss you Casey. They sniff around the yard for the longest time, I know they smell your scent out there and I know they wonder where you are. I try to tell them about where you went they listen like they do understand.
Oh God Casey, I don't know how to go on without you. The pain and grief is so hard to cope with. I pray you will send me a sign so that I will know you are OK. Remember when Grandpa died, I prayed for a sign and out of no where came a deer. Every morning when I drive to work, I look for a deer from you my big boy. Please Casey send me a deer. I leave for work at 5:30 now because I know the deers may still be out before the traffic gets too heavy. I will be looking every morning and when you are ready, send the deer. I love you Casey more than words can describe and I miss you with all of my heart and soul. I have to know you are OK and that you are happy and playing and healthy.
You received many kind messages from people who have visited you at the Rainbow Bridge. You have many new friends looking out for you. I hope you feel my love for you. I will write again this afternoon. Until then my boy, I will always love you....
Love, Mommy, Maggie, and Boo Boo

Some day I may learn to forgive The Vet that stole your life. I know that is what you and God want but; it is so hard to forgive him. Mainly because he had no remorse for what happened to you. Oh God Casey I miss you and I love. Life is not the same without you. Please send me a "sign" I need to know you are happy and healthy.
Hey Casey, I had a dog when I was a little girl, his name was Dino and grandpa took him to the pound. I loved him so much; can you try to find him and tell him I love him, find all of my babies, Honda too and then there was Duke, he was a good dog. Tell them all we will all be together one day.
I will write to you again tonight to see how you like the recliner I sent you and if I see a "sign" from you. Until then please know I will always love you....Mommy

August 22, 2009 Hi Casey, The Bronco's are playing tonight, this will be the first game since you left. It won't be the same with out you but we will hang up your bronco shirt and I hope you will be watching from heaven. Oh God Casey everything reminds me of you. It is so sad here on earth without you. I don't know what to do to pass the day away. They seem to drag on forever. I love you buddy and I will never ever forget about you. I'll write to you first thing in the morning until then my angle remember; I will always love you..... Mommy

There are too many bad memories here Casey and in order to be free I have to go. I love you more than life and I would have given mine to save yours. I love you Mr. Casey now and forever. I'll write again tonight. Until then my best friend, my buddy, my Casey, remember; I will always love you...Mommy

10-11-09 Good morning my angle dog. I had to copy and paste your story and I saved it to the computer so I can have it for ever, I asked for more space but they were unable to give me more. I left some of the first words I wrote here but had to delete the rest so I can keep writing to you.
My buddy, my best friend, I miss you so very much. There is not a day that you are not on my mind. You have been gone for over 2 months now, it feels like forever Casey. I miss you so much, and I still can't forgive the vet for losing you. He needs to lose his license so he can never do this to another dog again ever. I love you so much Mr. Casey you are and always will be in a special place in my heart. I'll write tomorrow, until then remember; I will always love you...Mommy.

10-14-2009 Hi Casey, its me Mommy. I miss you more everyday buddy. They say time heals all wounds but it won't heal the huge hole in my heart from missing you. I LOVE YOU MR. Casey and it breaks my heart to think that that vet who lost you is getting away with it as if nothing ever happened. I am going to write him a letter, he may have forgotten you, but I haven't and I am so sorry Casey, I just can't forgive him for what he did. I love you sooooooooooooo much and I miss you more. I will tell you how much I love you until we are together again. It's almost winter time so soon I'll be changing your page. I am sending you some red roses to show my love for you. I'll write again tomorrow. Until then remember; I will always love you...Mommy
October 22, My angle dog, I love you and I miss you so much. Mommy has had a really bad week, which is why I haven't written. But trust me Casey there is not a day that goes buy without thoughts of you. You are always on my mind every minute of every day. I especially miss you when I have a hard day because you were there to cheer me up. Just to hold you made the day better. Oh Casey I miss you so much. I want to to touch you one last time run my fingers through your fur and kiss you on your head. I miss having you here, knowing everyday you'd be waiting at the door for me. Oh God Casey some days I don't think I can go on without you. I hope you love heaven and that God holds you the way I did. Maggie and Boo have not been the same since you left. There is a sadness in their eyes that I can't explain. I think they understand when we listen to your song. I know they know it's you. I show them your picture and Mags just tilts her head and seems so confused. She never barks like she does when she sees other dogs. I think she wonders where you went. I love you Mr. Casey now and forever. I'll write this weekend, until then remember; I will always love you...Mommy
Oct 23, 2009 Casey I love you. I have been listening to your song since I got home. I talked about you at work today. You'd be proud I wanted to cry but I held back my tears for you Casey. Hey Casey a little dog named Pita came to the bridge 2 weeks ago. His mom is so sad. She lives in Calif. I talked to her for a long time. Can you look after Pita, and tell him to send his mom a sign that he is OK. Take care of him like only you can. You are so big, brave and gentle. I love you to the moon and back. I'll write tomorrow until then my best friend remember; I will always love you...Mommy.
10-25-09 Just wanted to tell you I love you Casey. I am not feeling too good so I'll write more tomorrow. I miss you my friend. Remember; I will always love you...Mommy

10-28-09 Hello my angle dog. I love you. I changed your back ground to winter because we are getting a snow storm. Work sent us home for toady an tomorrow. I sure miss you when it snows the way you use to run and play so happy and carefree. Its not fair that your life ended in the way it did, alone and with strangers, I can't get past this Casey. I loved you so much. Today is Ryan's B-Day I sure wish you were here for cake and ice cream. Man how you loved your sweets.God Casey I miss you. No one but me Mags and Boo listen to your song because it makes them sad. I get sad too Casey but I love listening to your song and tending to your memorial. I am trying to forgive the Vet Casey but its just so hard, I hate what he did to you. I will never understand if I life to be 100, Hey Casey I sure hope you found Sam. I got to thinking maybe you found my Mom and Dad, if you did baby please send me a sign. Come visit me, You use to and stopped. I look for you and a sign from you everyday. I hope you are taking good care of Pita and his Mommy is doing better because of you. You are so special. Ill write tomorrow. Until then remember, I will always love you...Mommy
11-1-09 Good morning my angle dog. I find I am really missing you today, I am not sure why but it feels like you just left me, I am feeling the same grief. Casey please send me a sign. I need to know you are in heaven with God. Tell me are you with grandma and grandpa? Oh Casey I love you so much. IT DOESN'T FEEL LIKE THIS PAIN WILL EVER END. I feel so afraid Casey. I miss you buddy. Its November, and remember how I always brought you turkey scraps? I miss you and I want you to come home. I'll be back soon, until them my angle dog, remember; I will always love you...Mommy
11-7-09 Good morning my angle dog. Oh God Casey so much is happening. I know you know what is going on. Ask God to help Kelly and Ryan. You are the closest to God. God spelled backwards is dog. God sure knew what he was doing when he created dogs. So that is why I ask you to talk to God for me. I don't think he always hears me Casey, but you I know he hears. I miss you so much and I love you forever. I'll be back as soon as I get the music fixed. Until then remember; I will always love you..Mommy 11-09-09 My Casey how I miss you. Casey Mommy is sad and worried about Kelly. Please ask God if she will be OK and then send me a sign. I need a Casey sign, please buddy I need you more than ever. You know what's going on, you were here through most of it. Please my angle dog ask God to protect her and give her a chance to turn her life around. I miss you so much. I love you. I'll look for a sign and tomorrow I'll let you know if I found it. Until then remember; I will always love you... Mommy.
11-18-09 Hi my angle boy. Well you know its been a really difficult couple of weeks. Kelly made it safe to the treatment center in NY tonight and I somehow think you were watching over her. Thank you, and tell God Thank you. Casey I miss you more with every day. It isn't getting easier I miss you and I love. I need you too. Casey please send me a sign that you are OK, and that Kelly is going to live with treatment. Ask God to keep his hand on her and keep her safe. Thank you Mr. Casey. I will always love you, yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Until I write again remember; I will always love you. Mommy...11-25-09 Happy Thanksgiving my angle dog. You loved Thanksgiving, you waited all day for the turkey scraps. I sure hope you get turkey in heaven. We are not having thanksgiving this year, so sad. I don't know what happened to our family Casey. I do know I love you and I miss you more everyday. Please ask God to help us Casey. We have grown so far apart. Too many bad things for too long. I love you baby boy. I'll writ again soon. Until then remember; I will always love you...Mommy
12-7-09 Good morning my angle dog. Oh how I miss you. Life is crazy boy, our family is falling apart. I don't know what to do anymore. I am running out of hope and energy. But I do know I love you and everyday it seems; I miss you more than the day before. Please ask God to help us. I love you Casey now and forever and we will soon be together. I have a funny feeling that I am coming soon. I know you are waiting for me. I love you and will write in a couple days. Until then; remember I will always love you... mommy.
10-14-2010 Casey my angle boy, I love you and miss you so much. Its hard to believe you have been gone for a year and 2 months. I don't think the pain of missing you will ever end. I pray you and Boo are playing, running, and eating ice cream together. Casey please talk to God and tell Him to look out for Mags as she is so sad and lonely. We are going to the Vet today I think Mags will need some medicine to help her sadness. But you my boy are close to God, tell Him how much Mags needs him to protect her. Casey I know you know about Kelly again I must ask you to talk to God. Please Casey ask God that when Kelly is out of the hospital she looses her desire to drink alcohol. Please Casey that is the only way to save her life. I wish you were here so I could rub your belly and hug you. I love and miss you so very much. Please Casey Remember; I will always love you. .. Mommy
10-17-2010 Two Bronco seasons without you, God Casey boy I sure miss you and love you. I hope you and Boo are together and I pray you have found all my other babies that went before you. Casey is my mom and dad there? show me a sign so I know we will all be together again. Remember Casey; I will always love you... Mommy
10-24-2010 My Casey, how I love and miss you. The Bronco's are playing again today and without you and Ryan I don't even like watching them anymore. It is just not the same. We destroyed your Cutler jersey I thought you'd like to know and maybe get a little laugh but we hang your Bronco shirt up every game. You were the best dog in the world and I deeply miss you. You and Boo lay together and wait for me,Until then Remember; I will always love you... Mommy
10-31-2010 Hello my angle boy. I sure miss you. Another Bronco game another Halloween without you,how will I go on? I miss you deeply. It doesn't seem possible that 14 months have passed without you. I love you so much. Until we are together again; Remember Casey; I will always love you... Mommy
11-6-2010 Good morning my angle boy. I visited Ryan Thursday. Thank you for talking to God, I love you, and Mags is starting to get better. Until we are together again; Remember; I will always love you... Mommy 11-13-2010 Good morning Angle boy. I sure miss you so much. Its been a year and 3 months since you went to the bridge and I have missed you every second. I love you and I know it was you and Boo who sent the deer looking over the church at Danah's wedding yesterday. Thank you Casey, I needed a sign and you sent one. I gave you a basket of leaves, remember in the fall how you would roll in the dead leaves and they would stick to your fur and then you would try to get inside sometimes you did and you'd shake them off all over the living room. I sure miss those days Casey. I wish you were here shaking leaves all over the house. I was never mad at you. I love you and miss you. Until we are together again, remember Caser boy, I will always love you.... Mommy
Comments would be appreciated by the author, Cindy
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