by Melissa McKenzie
Today has been 1 year since I sent you to heaven baby girl. I miss you and grieve for just as much as I did last year. The pain is not quite as severe, but it is still brutal and agonizing. I have to put on a brave face for the world because no body wants to hear about my pain all the time, and they shouldn't have to. However, when I'm alone I can let it out. The grief is so raw and overwhelming sometimes I feel like my heart is literally breaking. Half of my heart and soul went with you to heaven and I will never be whole again until we are together my love. I am so grateful for the Rainbow Bridge service. These are the only people that truly understand how I feel. I feel the closest to you when I am in our bed with your blankets and tiger, next to your urn. I look at your pictures everyday because I need to see your face every day. Please continue to come see Mommy in her dreams, I need that from time to time. I hope you are happy in heaven and everyone there is taking good care of you until I can get there. I miss you so much!!! I miss your sweet howl, your happy dance, playing with you, going for walks, cooking you food, rubbing your belly, scratching you, brushing your hair, watching you hump Tiger, watching you dig to china, watching Daddy hold you like a baby, watching you sleep, snuggling with you in the bed, kissing your head, and mostly, your sweet warm kisses on my nose. I will try to move on with my life the best I can because I know you don't want me to be sad. I will NEVER move on from you or forget you. There will never be a day when I don't think of you, talk to you, or see your face. Hold on to that cord baby girl... Mommy's coming.