Casper you came into my life so long ago. I knew the minute that I picked you up that my heart belonged to you. Your sweet face smiling at me and that loving kiss you gave me, well from that moment on it wasn't just Nancy anymore it was Nancy and Casper. I took you every where that I could. My vacations and days off where planned around you if you couldn't go I didn't go plain and simple. You were sick most of your life though, you had parvo and then various other ailments along the way, you made it through them all. Vets had told me to let you go years ago because of the cost it was going to take to keep you alive, but money wasn't an issue I would have worked three jobs to pay for your vet bills and I am so glad I didn't listen to those other vets because I would have missed over 7 years with you. You couldn't eat regular dog food or anything with beef in it any longer so I started cooking your meals myself-rice, chicken and vegatable broth-you loved that so much Casper. That was easier on you than trying different foods that always made you sick and ended with us back at the vets again. You were more like a child to me than a pet, Casper I would have given you a Kidney had they said that would make you better but it wasn't to be, it was cancer and it was large. It came quickly and took you within 3 months time. I watched you suffer every day with that, some not as bad as others some worse, but you always was at the door for me with that loving smile of yours and kiss hello when I got home. I knew I had to let you go when you starting coughing up blood and it was in your stool, and your walking was becoming difficult. I couldn't make you suffer anymore. It took me numerous calls to the vet and two cancelled appoitments before I could put you to sleep. The doctor came to our home-I wanted you to be in your calm and comfortable environment when this happened. You died with me petting your head and body telling you over and over that I loved you so very much and how much I was going to miss you. I'm so glad that I took that afternoon off to spend with you before the Vet came-we just layed together snuggled up to eachother, you slept most of the time but I got to hold you and I will treasure that for the rest of my life. It's been a little over a week since that night and I haven't sleep much since then. I got your ashes yesterday which I thought would kill me picking them up, after getting over the initial shock I felt a comfort knowing you were "home" again with me. I slept with you right next to me and for the first time since you left for Rainbows Bridge I actually slept a little and felt your warmth next to me. Thank you for still taking care of me Casper, you always did while you were here and you continue to do so from Rainbows Bridge. I hope your having fun my little love, I can't wait to see you again and hold you in my arms and kiss that sweet face. Did you find Brandy Lee and Lucky yet I know you will have fun with them, you always missed Lucky so much after he died now you can play with him forever. Until we meet at Rainbows Bridge my love may your days be playfull and happy. Love-Mommy