Friends,

I am writing this to honor our beloved Oscar, and also to share with you how gifts can come in a surprising package. You can call this a sappy dog story, a love story, a people story, a story. And you can believe in God or not. Some of you will understand, some of you will not, some of you will find this trite, others will find this deep, and some will read and think I've lost my freakin mind. For others, these words will resonate; either way, I hope Oscar's story adds a new perspective for you, as it has done for us.

Sue and I have been together since 1983, yes we are old. May not look it, but old. Around the early '90s Sue returned to college. Sometime in 1992 I started on a road of severe drug use leading to an uncontrollable addiction. On May 4, 1999, Sue found Oscar roaming the USC campus. She brought him home. On November 30, 2009, Oscar was laid to rest into that good, good night. While his spirit was strong, his body became ravaged by an aggressive cancer. We are heart-broken.

I am aware many people say their pets, family members, are special. I am not trying to undermine anyone, but so is our Oscar. To say we are proud of our puppy is a severe understatement. While Oscar has his unique qualities (deductive reasoning, mastery of geometry, creative problem solving -- ask me one-on-one if you are curious, but these are for real), the many qualities listed below are simply dog qualities. I think that perhaps people too often confuse our wants with our needs, we complicate the simple things, we look too far in the future for contentment and not at what is here, and so much more. But believe or not, this dog, our beloved Oscar, gave us reason to pause and revisit some of these oversights. He gives us purpose.

Unknown to us at the time, God delivered to us a gift. Oscar has the most vibrant light, generous spirit, and gentlest of demeanors. It was just packaged in the form of a dog. A dog, not a person. In other words, a life form that is unfettered by social guidelines and free to behave as it feels. Free of "what I think you think about me", free of selfishness and self absorption, free of pride and ego, free of anger and resentment, free of greed and self-promotion, free from fear of rejection and being afraid to ask, free of being afraid to trust or trust too much, free from holding back joy and silliness.... free from all the strange fears we hold that force our human behavior. These are traits that many have encouraged, many have written about, many have claimed is the road to enlightenment. Yet Oscar just came with these traits, and despite endless exposure to human social frailties, he never wavered and stayed true to his nature. Just some of the many lessons Oscar taught us. I can go on and on with stories, but prefer to summarize.

We took gave him shelter and food... In return, he gave infinite joy, undying devotion, and unconditional love.
We would take him on a walk, just a walk... In return, he gave infinite joy, undying devotion, and unconditional love.
We would take him on daily errands... In return, he gave infinite joy, undying devotion, and unconditional love.
We would take him to the park... In return, he gave infinite joy, undying devotion, and unconditional love.
We would take him to dog park... In return, he gave infinite joy, undying devotion, and unconditional love.
We would take him to the café... In return, he gave infinite joy, undying devotion, and unconditional love.
We would take him to the beach... In return, he gave infinite joy, undying devotion, and unconditional love.
In time, we learned to share joy, dedication, and kindness to other people and strangers. Sorry, but we are still selective on the unconditional love thing.

Not having any children, Oscar soon became the center of our attention and the center of our affections. Our daily schedules began to revolve around his activities. We noticed that he seeks out new experiences, so we sought out the new and designed vacations around new experiences for him. We stayed at different hotels, different cities, different beaches -- we went to dog events, dog places, Halloween dog parades -- we learned agility and even learned kayaking.

We observed his delight with each experience, new and old. We learned to do the same.
We observed his insatiable need to explore each experience to the fullest. We learned to do the same.
We observed his constant curiosity with all life forms. We learned to do the same.
We observed his gentle and benevolent approach to these life forms... plant, animal, human. We learned to do the same.
We observed he wakes up happy and eager to start the day. We learned to do the same.
We observed him openly share his food, treats, toys, etc. We learned to share openly also.
We just observed him and found aptitude, brilliance, kindness, gentleness.

Oscar simply, just simply, yearned to be with us. Just chill and hang out. Interact. Be present. Be part of. Shortly, we found ourselves reciprocating, weaving plans with him in all our thoughts.

He likes routine. We learned to eliminate chaos from our lives and settle for order.
He gets scared when we argue. We learned to talk and communicate without high emotion.
He likes to sit on the grass and simply watch the world go by. We learned to slow down and see the beauty of existence.
He is a "bully mix" dog, vulnerable to human social prejudices and selective laws. We learned to be protective without being unproductively rebellious.
Because of his appearance, many people feared him, yet he remained friendly, mellow, and non-threatening. We learned to face prejudices against our own appearance without anger.
When he is frightened, we learned to be supportive and encouraging.
When he was sometimes stubborn and willful. We learned to be patient, yet persistent.
He does not speak the same language, so we learned to communicate through our deeds and not our words.
He likes being silly. We learned to laugh more often and not take everything so serious.
He is solution oriented, not blocked by problems. And his solutions were the simple ones, not complicated. We learned to find resolution to our trivial problems.
He is forgiving. We learned to at least try to do the same.
Again he is a dog. He is always happy. For us, this one is a work in progress.

On March 1, 2008, we adopted another dog, Kerri. Having been at a rescue for 6-8 years, she really did not know how to act. Oscar taught her everything. I mean everything. We learned to teach by showing, not just telling. Oscar and Kerri together thrived at life. We are still working on this.

In the end, we have a perfect bond, unmatched by anything we have ever experienced. A perfect relationship. A relationship where our joy was magnified by Oscar's joy. A relationship where our pain intensified when he hurt. A relationship where we sought to meet his needs before he even needed. I believe certain things are once in a lifetime opportunities. I cannot tell you why, but the packaging did not deter us when we received God's gift. That he is a dog seemed irrelevant. In many ways, that he is a dog made it easier, more adorable. Instead we were moved by his beautiful spirit. I hope you all meet such a spirit, regardless of what the packaging is. Our lives have been forever transformed by Oscar, our perspective forever broader, our goals forever simpler, our ability to give forever more selfless, our ability to receive forever more grateful, our value towards all life forms forever appreciative.

We are so blessed to have Oscar grace us. Yes, we both want him back so much. He left us way too soon. Our grief, sadness, sorrow, and pain are indescribable..., surpassed only by Oscar's infinite joy, undying devotion, and unconditional love. Good night little Oscar.

Thanks,
Nigel Jay