Our family cat Socksy Marie brought much love and joy to us.We have many fond memories of her.Even though she was sick the last 3 months of her life, she still enjoyed going outside and sitting on our deck bench.To us she didn't seem that sick.We loved her and we didn't want to admit it, after 1 and a half months she was starting to show signs of failing health. I watched her suffer and i would cry and ask her if she was alright.My husband and my 15 year old daughter didn't want to admit it was time to let her go even though it would cause pain and sadness.It was on May 4th, 2011 when Socksy looked into my eyes and wanted me to let her go. I told my husband and he said we could do it on Friday May 6th, 2011. He then changed his mind because my daughter was going to be in a horse show on Sunday May 8th, 2011.I was the who found her underneath our deck when i called her and heard leaves being pushed around. I looked underneath the deck and saw her trying to get up but her hind legs gave out,so i reached under and got her.I put her in my arms not really sure of what was going on.She was making sounds in her throat, and 2 minutes later she died in my arms. It broke my heart and i started to cry. She was really gone and the pain of knowing i would never see her sweet eyes alive with life. My baby was gone and it hurt more than i could ever imagine.I was mad at my husband for not taking her to put her to sleep.Socksy would not have to suffer and die Saturday If she had it done on Friday like i asked him to do she wouldn't have to go through the painful last minutes of her life.I missed her more than anyone in the family. The pain is bad and it hurts so much. If only i could see her one more time.I was very alone in my grieving until i called the pet loss grief support person. She helps alittle because now i am in so much grief and i know as time goes on it will lessen,but she will always be in my heart and memories forever.Missing you alot and my love for you will be forever,you are my precious baby girl your grieving, loving, Mom. I have set up a memoriam of a 3of the same picture in my room,my daughters room,and the living room and i also wrote 3 different papers to be put in my bedroom and the loving room all about our loving Socksy.