I was 8 years old and in the 2nd grade when I came home from school. It was in fall when things were just starting to get cold. My brother Johnny came home with this big brown puppy over his shoulder... He was the runt and the last baby to leave his mother... I remember giving him a bath his first day there. He was so sweet and had the softest brown eyes... He was going to be my dog, and everyone asked me "Well what are you going to name him?" Of course I was showered with suggestions, but I looked at him and said "His name is Josh!"
Years went by, I celebrated many birthdays with Josh. He was always content to lay his head in your lap and just look adoringly into your eyes... He loved a good car ride and was excellent with kids. My niece and nephew and even me would put clothes, hats, animal ears, anything we could find on that dog. He always stayed calm and gentle through the whole embarrassing ordeal.
My life became more full, and even though my time with him was less and less, it was never any less special. I loved walking him on our street and along our Tennessee River walk. He was always beside either me or my mother... but time wore on.. and time is something one can never take back.
Josh started to slow down, and it became harder and harder for him to get his back legs up and walk the stiffness out. He was still a happy dog full of love to give, and always excited to see us when we came home. But on the last week of his life... there was no more happiness in his eyes... He could no longer control his bodily functions (He was an excellent dog on not making 'boo boo's' in the house) which embarrassed him greatly. We took him to the Vet on January 14th of 2003 to see if they could ease his pain. They took him in the back and X-rayed him and told us the sad news.
We never had Josh fixed, because "someday" we wanted a puppy from him, but someday never game. His prostate had swelled and pushed all his intestines to the front of his body. The vet told us that she would do as much as we wanted her to do, but she was honest and said in the end, it will not relieve his pain.
We made the hard decision to send him on his way that day. We were told that some people like to take them home for one last night. I knew if we had done that, we would have fooled ourselves into thinking that he was ok, or getting better, or was just in a bad mood that day.
We told our vet to go ahead and we said our goodbye's to him. One thing that I do regret doing was leaving that room. I still hate myself for leaving him, he had been there my whole life, comforting me, and in the end, I was too selfish to be there for him. What was he thinking in that room full of strangers? Probably something like: Why aren't my friends here? Why didn't I get the chance to say goodbye to them? Will I ever see them again?
They came out and told us that "it was done". I never seen his lifeless body... I never wanted to, I wanted to remember him alive. That is why I didn't want to be in the room while he was being put to sleep... We brought him home and buried him in the back-yard of our old house.
We now have another chocolate Lab named Dakota. At the time when I bought him I expected him to be just like Josh, but he wasn't. I still love him just as much, but he is a completely different dog. But this time, I'm sticking with him till the end... no regrets this time!