I knew snowball had been ill for some time time. It started with her teeth 3 months ago , her teeth kept growing and she wasnt filing them down so i had to take her to my local vet were they had to give her a operation to remove a broken one and file down the overgrown ones. She was given a well balanced diet with fresh hay and straw everday and with complete access to her run and the garden in the day. She started going downhill from then on. she lost so much weight and had trouble eating we got her to the vet again a month after the op and she had to have another. blood was coming out of her mouth because the spurs on her teeth were cutting her mouth to shreds. after this she purked up alot and was eating and drinking and gaining weight although we had to keep her inside.

however things were too good to be true... 3 weeks later she really was going back into the woods. Sh stopped eating and drinking and had such a bad stomach. we had to force feed her and make her drink which wasnt easy, she was on soo much medication for pain and her stomach. When i came back from work i went to check on her and she could even walk properly she was so weak and skinny she didnt even have the energy to clean yourself.She treid walking and just wobbeled towards me thats when i kneww i had to get her to are emergency vet at 10 pm at night. The vet took her in straight away and said it was a 50 50 chance she would live. leaving her ther overnight was the hardest but nothing could prepare me for the nextday. I was soo excited about bringing her home again i thought she would make it she was a fighter. I hadnt heard from the vet which meant that she werent dead however she hadnt improved either and the vet had rung us saying we had better get there pronto. When we got there we were ushered into a consultation room and she was brought out, the medicine they had given her was not working and she was refusing the drip and force feeding, they couldnt even keep her clean she was in agonising pain. The vet said it was infection in your stomach which has spread to the heart and lungs. Her stomach was very painfull from inflamation and the build up of gas and a blockage. They said she could even have a tumour as well. we had two options the first to carry on with treatment which meant putting her under and getting a catheter on her which would cause more pain and they said she was so weak that she may not survive the anesthetic. Then the option to put her to sleep. I cried so hard i didnt knoww what to do but i looked at you and you looked at me and thats when i kneww i had to think of her welfare and quality of life i didnt want her to be suffering anymore and i had to make the hardest decision in my life to have you pts. I held you and gave you final kisses and goodbyes as the vet got the needle i held you close and you buried your nose in my tshirt. i said this is not goodbye i will see you again. you started to hop around for abit you seemed happier as if you kneww that you were going to a better place...to rainbow bridge. she put the needle in as i held you and by the first half of the first dose you had passes i will never forget the look in your eye as the glint slowly went and your breathing slowly stopped. When she listened for your heart i was hoping it was still going but no you had gone and the rest of the day was just a blur.

I am so lost and cant stop crying i hope i did the right thing as i feel i didnt i miss her and would do anything to get her back its like someone has ripped through my heart leaving it a tangled mess. each tear i shed just makes me sadder. im in deep sorrow and i truly knoww now how it feels putting a beloved pet to sleep i will never forget that moment .... we shared soo many happy memories i just cant believe she has gone its soo hard to cope i just want her back xxxxxxx