Tears covered my boy as they flowed from my eyes, and washed away all of my joy.

For the first time ever, I cried from a place that I had not known was inside me.

Not only did I cry from the from the bottom of my heart and the depths of my soul, that dwells within me,

But I cried in anguish from a deep black hole that will always be there to try haunt me with regret

Of the day that God reached down with gentle hands and took my baby boy.

Even though I can never be rid of the torturious black hole, that just a few days ago housed so much peace and love given to me by my loving Elliotte,my sweet baby boy,

I can begin to try to fill the hole with sweet memories of him and how much we both felt so much unconditional love, the kind of love that is the best.

Away I will now be able to send the pain of watching him in all of his loyality and nobleness, trying to go on just to be with me.

Suffering so, when he needed to go, wanting nothing more than to keep me happy.

Though he was blind and hurting and lost, he still gave me his kisses and never wanted to leave from my side.

After so long of being in pain,and unable to see, his mind just up and exited hidious the ride.

Dementia they called it, he was just plain lost and could never find his way home again even though it was all around him.

He would walk by day and walk by night, searching,for home while longing tore at him.

He began to cry, and howl because he was hurt and he was lost,
The fear was so painful to see in my little boss.

But through it all he did not forget me, I know because when the time came, when the decision was final
When I knew without a doubt and was through with denial,

He gave me a kiss on my lips, and I laid him upon the vets table,
My heart so heavy and my legs unstable,

He looked at me with one clear eye and I saw that he could see me and he knew me and he was ready to rest.

How could that be, some may ask, that he looked at you, when that he was blind you did attest?

My answer is simple and what I believe in my heart to be true,
That God gave me a gift, a sign for he knew,

The hurt would far more than what I would be able to take,
Had I thought that my baby did not know me and why his life I had decided to take.

God, in his love and abundance of grace, gave me a precious gift, a chance at some kind of joy,

He gave my beloved pet a moment of site, so that I would know that it was not really me, but that it was "He" who had decided that it was time to reach down with gentle hands and take my baby boy.

By,
Elliotte's Mom

Thank you Father "God" for your abundant grace!