A True Best Friend
by Travis .........................................
For almost seventeen years you stood loyal to me and always by my side. Every day was treated by you as though it was the only day; packing as much love into your kisses and tail wags as was possible. I saved you all those years ago from an unloving and abusive home and in return you made sure I always had unconditional and unrelenting love delivered to me as only a true best friend could provide.


Though you slowed the past few years and began to struggle to stand, it never deterred you from giving me your all. Our games of fetch and Frisbee were replaced by long walks and shorter bouts of tug-o-war. Soon those too were replaced by shorter walks and very long tummy and ear rubs. Finally, your once vibrant eyes turned into distant stars, still gleaming yet dim. I tried to prepare myself for what I knew would inevitably come, but each time I thought you had hit your wall, you bounced back like a true fighter and I put away such awful thoughts.


Your body began to wither though and you had lost so much weight. Diet changes helped keep your energy up for a while, but age and cancer began to tear you apart from the inside out. My heart and my soul burned with hatred for my own thoughts of helping you escape. My selfishness held you with me (maybe too long) as I was determined to keep you in my life.


When my son found two stray and abandoned puppies last week, I was met with terrible and fearful questions. Would they invigorate you somehow as family and friends told me they would? Or, would they finally give you reason to give up seeing that your family would have new dog kisses, tail wags and unconditional love? As it turned out, both happened. At first, you got a second wind and seemed almost a puppy yourself. You found your old toys in the basement and brought them to the puppies. You taught them how to make the furry monkey toy squeak and how to hold a rawhide bone with your paws instead of chewing on a table leg. That was last week and my heart was lifted.


Then, one day and without warning, you slowly, quietly and purposefully walked away stopping for a moment to look back at me as you climbed the stairs. You rested your head on your favorite pillow and your body shut down. You became a shell and unrecoverable. That was Sunday and my heart shattered.


I tried to feed you your favorite food; a big plate of hot dogs, but you only ate 4, maybe five pieces then looked up at me and sighed. You saw my tears and my shoulders shaking and then rested your head on my lap as I fought with myself on what I needed to do. You rested there long enough for me to take one last picture of you and when I snapped it I realized then that those last few months, you were truly living for me and only me. With this thought, I stood you up against your will and mine and walked you to the door. As we passed what were normally two high energy puppies, I was shocked to see them sitting quietly and obediently as though they had been trained. We paused there for a moment, you and I, as each of them one at a time came and licked you gently on the cheek as if to say "good bye and we've got this.". I held you to the very end and as the vet's injection of overdosed anesthesia spilled through your body and your light went out. I held you tightly, bathing your face with my tears and begging myself not to think of how I could do this to you. Rather I tried to console myself with thoughts of us one day running together again. Those thoughts had little soothing effect on me though and I buried you that day. I buried you in your favorite part of our yard, right in front of an Easter Lilly. That was Monday and I fell apart.


Goodbye my friend. Thank you for being a part of my life and you will forever remain in that special room my heart has dedicated to you. I will always think of you.

Comments would be appreciated by the author, Travis
 
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