One weekend a year and a half ago, my dog from one day to the next could barely walk. I was scared, confused, and learned that he had spinal stenosis. He was a pug, and I had no idea they could have those kinds of problems. My dog had spinal surgery in December 2010, but I knew that he would have limited time after that. His walking improved but he was never the same. The surgery bought me another year with him...but in February I noticed a quick decompensation. I had to put him down 2 weeks ago, on April 27th, 2012.

I miss him so bad...when will I stop crying? When will the pain go away? I was so prepared, but yet I am so incredibly sad. I woke up today crying...when I open my eyes and he is nowhere to be found...it kills me.

I try to think of the good things, the good times. I had 12 years of good times. His tongue stuck out a few inches and everywhere we went people laughed at us. He loved the attention. I try to remember the time he chewed up my new coffee table, the times he would lick my tears when I was sad. He was ready to go before I was ready to let him go. He started sleeping in the other room, which he had never done in 12 years. I just miss him so bad...

I know it will get better. I just keep looking at the doorway, hoping to see him peek his head around, hoping to hear his little footsteps...I just can't believe he's really gone.