im a 13 year old girl.. that has lost her baby..her name was dutchess and i loved her so.she had congestive heart failure and fluid in her lungs and heart which for her was hard to breath.she was a fighter.even thought she was a pit bull i loved her liek my own baby.she as 12 years old when she died.. today that i post this is 2 weeks and 4 days without her.she was put to sleep on june 12 of 2007. and no matter if it is 2008 or any more years than that i will never forget her.i look at her ashes and i cry.my father told me to try to forget the bad and think of all the good memories of her. for example we always used to play with her and she would run around and play back... but when i do think of those i just want to go outside and play with her.. but when i do i know that she cant play with me because she is dead and she isnt coming back.
i have her ashes in my room.. with only two pictures that i have of her since she died...if anything happens to those or any of her things tha ti have i dont no wat i would do.

the day that we put her to sleep i wrote this.

this is gonna be a differnet life now.
she was a dog yes,
but my dog.. she was mine.. i loved her to death...
and i know that she was suffering.
but i miss her ,i really do..
once i get her ashes, i will deffently never forget her.
i will think about her nite and day.
and i will make life like it used to be..
only with her not being in it.
and even though i know she wanted me to stay strong.
im going to cry every nite..
bc i kno that i wont ever get over this.
its was soo weird... like you knew i was sad dutchess ,didnt you?.
because how you just started to chew on the bone for a while.
and then you stopped and then they took you and put you to sleep.
my daddy said that she didnt no wat was going on.
i dont no if she did or not.
bc i think she did to know... did you girl?
but then again she prolly thought that she was going into surgry .
like u did before.
i know its gonna be soo different with out you girl.
but life is going on for me.
and it still is for you.
but its just some thoughts i get, which
are that i wish we did the surgrey.
you were a fighter.
you could of made it.or for atleast a little while
soo i could of told you my goodbyes.. other just saying i love you
and just saying ill be with you.. bc me saying that i dont no if i kept
that promise..yes thats a promise to me.. you will be with me soo i guess
i will be with you right?
but then i didnt want you to suffer even more if we did the surgrey.
yes we all wanted to girl.but we thought that it would of been easier on you.
is it? is it easier on you now that your asleep?
i want you to know babygirl that i still have your bone.
soo when ever you come back you can have it again okay?
my dad also told me to think of the good times.
wen you used to jump up and play around..and run after us.
but then wen i do it all shoots down and gets back to the bad memories..
and i think to myself.. why get all happy .. and want her to do all the
good memories because we know you cant because you are not here..
but i know even though you are not here fully.. i will think of you.
the good memories, and bad.
bc i kno that in those memories you wanted me to be happy.....
right?
ill always be happy when i think of you.
if something is wrong.
i will think of you . and you will help me right?
i tried to have funn with you .like the old days.
but i guess we all have time, where we cant play like we used to,
i remember that sunday..
you were out and you left the house.
i was soo worried about you..
i had to go look for you.
and then finally i found you.
its like you knew i was looking for you.
im soo sorry that you had to suffer this long.
but i am glad that you fought as good as you could.
its sooo hard to think of you now..
because now all i want to do is just
go outside and just play with you..
but i know that i cant.
soo i love you girl...
and i hope you no that..

i love you dutchess.

i love you babygirl... you were my dog.. and i loved you
so much..i miss you and i hope you are better now...
i will alawys think of you everynite and every day...

i hope you no that me, mom, nikki, and daddy
all cared about you.. and we still do even tho you are gone.
i kno that you will be with me every single day..
and i told you right before all this happened that i
loved you and that i would be there for you also.
soo remember that okay...

u were such a fighter...
u fought this long. and im soo happy you did..
but i wish we did this earlier.
soo you didnt have to suffer.
i kno you did..
i felt it to...
i love you babygirl

I love you dutchess

R.I.P
dutchess
june 12 2007
at 10:45 a.m

<3

but its still different without her.and if i could do anything , its to bring my pet back. and to bring everyone else back also.well jsut the people that deserve their pet back.my dog dutchess was never abused , never hit , nor never forgotten . so nothing is going to change it now. she will still never be forgotten...

soo ilove you dutchess and i always will